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Made it 3 weeks before relapse now I'm flatlining. Help!

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by Kvothe1318, May 11, 2017.

  1. May 11, 2017 #1
    Kvothe1318

    Kvothe1318 Fapstronaut

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    The title says it all. After I relapsed all the improvements I noticed have vanished and I'm deeply flatlining. Also having sex dreams constantly. Is this normal? Did I ruin all my progress I made? How do I tell my GF?
     
    Kvothe1318, May 11, 2017
    Kvothe1318, May 11, 2017
    #1
  2. May 11, 2017 #2
    MadHatter

    MadHatter Fapstronaut

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    Welcome to the brotherhood!

    No true progress is ever truly undone, in my opinion.
    NoFap is a marathon, not a 100-meter dash.

    Improvements are over-rated, somewhat. Some people go into this journey, expecting immediate results. If there are any, they may leave as quickly as they came. Remember that achieving a true re-wiring of the brain takes time, patience, and persistence. Those are the things which bring the most benefits and improvements.

    Perhaps try not to dwell on what you have lost, but rather on what you are interested in gaining from your journey. Stay positive.

    As for "is this normal?" having dreams is normal, of course, as is flat-lining at some points. I am no expert, but it is possible you are repressing your sexual urges, so they come out through your subconscious. I have no idea. How do you feel?

    How to tell your GF? that is completely up to you, and you alone.
    I have no grasp of the specific nature of your relationship, its length, or level of commitment.
    Honesty is good, and it can bring freedom, but you have to pick your moments.
     
    MadHatter, May 11, 2017
    MadHatter, May 11, 2017
    #2
    sheep4ryan and sparkywantsnoPMO like this.
  3. May 11, 2017 #3
    sparkywantsnoPMO

    sparkywantsnoPMO NoFap Moderator & Yeoman

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    Does your gf know you were rebooting? Does she understand how addiction recovery works and that relapse are possible? If these are true, be generically honest with her. You don't have to give details, but let her know what your triggers were, what you're going to do to avoid those triggers next time, and that you are still committed to beating this.
     
    sparkywantsnoPMO, May 11, 2017
    sparkywantsnoPMO, May 11, 2017
    #3

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