Lost decade...

Hi guys,

I’m 30 years old, been fapping for about 18 years. It started about once per week and really rolled up to once or twice a day at one point.

I’ve abstained from fapping before, but that usually was just to tease myself before the next fap. 5th December 2018 is the first time I’ve decided to do a noFap for the sake of better mental, physical and spiritual strength.

My main motivations are to control my motivation thru controlling my dopamine levels. Be more alpha male than the socially awkward wall flower I’ve been so far in my life. And also to focus more on my spiritual path.

This is not just an experiment, this is the real deal. I will be observant of the changes that my body, mind and spirit goes through. I don’t mind documenting it if someone can guide me to the correct forum and I would love to have an accountability partner if anyone out there can be so kind.

So far, it’s been 5 days. No random boners yet lol, but there is a marked increase in energy levels during few hours of the day. No drastic change in motivation levels but a lot of learning has happened about the negative effects of fapping. My mind however was almost a constant X-rated movie for the last 4 days, today... not so much thankfully.

The urge to exercise has started and curiousity about how to improve my sleeping habits is on top of my mind. The general helplessness I had about my life (very stressful job) is fading away and I have a more positive outlook about my future coz I’m making a positive change.

Spiritually, my attempts at meditation are getting more serious as the realization that I should not be trying to “silence” my mind... rather an unmotivated and directionless observation of my instantaneous consciousness results in the correct state to begin meditative inquiry.

Wish me luck!

 

Thanks so much for the reply!

I will look up Sigma Male for sure!

Ur absolutely right, I am an introvert but when I meant “Alpha” I don’t mean the stereotypical macho man... I meant just “feeling unthreatened” and “being more assertive” ... it’ll be nice to be more confident while talking to stranger ladies too.

Thanks again.