Looking for any advice on how to restructure some connections with my girlfriend.

Hey UraniumMouthwash!

I feel you man. I'm in a similar situation in my relationship, and also have similar struggles on how to work on it. I cannot make it past 3-4 weeks either, and it seems to build a wall between us every time I relapse. I feel that her support & faith in me decreases each time. And I cannot seem to grasp the importance of this yet. I just hope we won't keep this up until rock bottom hits, and the woman decides that she's worth more than to stay in a relationship like this.

Best of luck to you in healing!

 

As a young woman who is struggling a lot with my boyfriend's habits I would say one of the best things you could do is just to be open about your progress and struggles. It might not sound very helpful but if nothing else I feel as though the openness shows your willingness to work through it and that you care and are invested in her. Hearing it can be incredibly painful indeed but at least it is honesty rather than lies and deceit which is of course also painful. If you try and talk to her about it in a sensitive and patient way that in and of itself shows care and attention in a way she may feel she isn't getting personally due to of your struggles. I hope this helps if even a bit!
Best of Luck!

 

Salter, can you go for professional help? I recommend this to anybody! Therapy works if you find a good one. It will make you reach deep inside yourself to find out why you do it and it will give you more accountability if you are face to face with a human instead of a computer. It's great to have these forums but still not as great with face to face admission and sharing.

 

The advice here seems like very good advice to me. You have to be open - but of course that doesn't mean providing every little detail - 'I've relapsed but I'm back on the wagon again' is good enough.
Give her all your internet and phone passwords, or make her your internet nanny. Now here's a shocking thought. Quit all internet and social media. You'll be fine without it. You'll be less triggered and have much less opportunity. I've taken internet off my phone and it's been amazing.
Or, tell her your username and invite her to look at your reboot log. And if you don't have one, start one.
Lastly, 3 weeks is a top effort. Well done. Try to make it to 4 weeks this time.