short check in yesterday wasn't that great, I have some trouble in my relationship every time the topic "future and jobs" is in the room I'm tired, I just want to rest for a bit, I don't know how much I'll be able to do today. I wish I could celebrate my accomplishments, my road so far, but I just feel dirty and small. There are some accusations I have to process, that I'm not stable enough, my emotions are too much, I'm not confident enough... how can I build confidence when I get critique over and over. When I feel like I moved forward and it never seems to be enough. I'm really really fed up right now. Staying strong, the urges come and go, but I won't give in, not right now, not ever.