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Let’s just start from the beginning, it’s easier that way!

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by SwingerAddict, Jul 25, 2018.

  1. SwingerAddict

    SwingerAddict New Fapstronaut

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    Greetings everyone...

    I’m a married white male, 36 yrs old, father for three, hard working, career dedicated professional. My wife and I have been talking about the swinger lifestyle for almost 7 yrs now, mainly I who is the sexual freak in the relationship. My wife was a virgin when I married her so it’s hard for her to overcome the anxiety and fear of being with other men and women in front of me. So I turn to porn and fap nut away!

    When I was younger and earlier in our marriage, I would often did myself cheating on my wife because I just wasn’t getting the sex I wanted at home. Not because she didn’t want to but because she wasn’t mentally prepared to have sex for pleasure, more for procreation. I would purposely let myself get caught when I got tired of the lady so that my situation at home would get tense to the point where I had no choice but to let the other women go. Still it didn’t help my sex life. We tried swinging in 2010 and that flopped on us. Had a bad experience and we put it on hold. That killed me big time and then I went back to sleeping with other women. 14yrs into my married, I stopped cheating on wife and said to finally once again, I’m done cheating on you so let’s just cheat and fuck others together. So we decided to try the swinger lifestyle.

    I wanted to better my life and decided to quit smoking cigarettes 1yr ago, smoked for 20+yrs. I do suffer from anxiety and depression, am a medical marijuana patient. I’ve been heavily smoking MJ for 4 yrs now and has helped maintain my stability for the most part. Now that it’s legal, even easier to consume higher doses when wanting. It definitely is affecting that part of the brain because I always feel euforic and horny. When I can’t get sex, I get depressed, when I get depressed, I burn MJ and FAP FAP FAP away!!!

    Yes, three nuts, back to back is my tempo. We find it extremely difficult to find other couples to play, which I allow to depress me. My wife works odd hours at times and never has the weekend off to be able to go out and meet other couples, who wants to date on a week night? So how to fulfill the void, watch foursome porn! I wake up at 6am and have 2 hours to myself to do whatever and love spending the time just rubbing myself and masturbating.

    Lately I’ve noticed I cannot get a firm erection, my penis feels numb and tingles at times, I’ll feel slight pain and tenderness in my ballsack, upper groin area and at times even on my inner thighs. Could this all be poor circulation related? I’m not too physically active and I work in a very high stressed environment, another factor to my high desire to escape work and fuck my wife but it’s either she’s not home or the kids are home, so again I fap away!

    Last week, I had nutted 5 times within two hours and later that night went to hospital. Pain was harsh. It was so embarrassing explaining to the doctor my daily routines. Fortunately for me he said doesn’t look like anything is swollen so you should be fine, just relax on the excess “wear and tear.” My fear has helped slightly but still not enough. Not touching myself is the harder than not having a cigarette. I’ve said a lot , never thought I’d come out this way but I guess I need some help and someone to talk to in a form less embarrassing.

    Thanks for reading....
     
    Electraflier likes this.
  2. TheProcedure

    TheProcedure Fapstronaut

    Hey @SwingerAddict , welcome to the site ! Glad you're on here, this is an awesome community that's changing my life.

    So, just want to make sure i'm on the same page - what of the things/habits you mentioned do you desire to change or let go of?
     
  3. Welcome @SwingerAddict. You are at the right place to fight your addicton. But your story sounds hard for me. Did you already try fighting your addictons on another way? I mean it doenst sound like your woman likes the swinger thing, does she? Just some thoughts.
     
  4. SwingerAddict

    SwingerAddict New Fapstronaut

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    This is my first stop.... I would really like to find myself to stop fapping completely. It’s sooo hard not to touch myself... even if it’s for just a quick 30 seconds. Secondly I’d like to not have sex and swinging on my mind all day long.
     
    Electraflier likes this.
  5. SwingerAddict

    SwingerAddict New Fapstronaut

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    No I haven’t tried to fight it other ways... and she does like the idea, and loves exploring other women herself, just at an extremely reduced pace!
     
    Electraflier likes this.

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