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Kissing doesn't make me aroused

Discussion in 'Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunctions' started by Svabo, Jan 19, 2019.

  1. Svabo

    Svabo Fapstronaut

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    Anyone has any techniques for reconnecting my mind with my penis?

    I've been on and off on nofap for months now. Usually I get to around day 35 and my testosterone is boosting and I feel like full of energy but my mind is just wanting an orgasm. I feel so bored and I want to cuddle and be intimate but my penis is just unresponsive. I can get it hard but I'm not connected to it mentally, like ok, it's hard but I don't feel aroused at all. That is big problem when I get intimate with girls because I can't get aroused just by kissing and everything bothers me, like I could get aroused only if I can concentrate on my penis to be hard. It's like the missing link btw my mind and penis. I did noticed that when girl is being totally sexual, like talking dirty and giving herself fully to me (without any romance, like hooker) then I become aroused like instantly. It seams my long lasting porn addiction had separated my emotional and sexual side and I can't get aroused by girl as person but only by girl as sexual object. Problem is that most of girls want things to go slowly before they want to be called "dirty sluts" in bed :/
    The thins I've noticed is that orgasm and arousal is purely mind based because in times of crisis I would turn on YT videos of girls posing in nylons (my fetish) and I would get instantly turned on and my penis would follow. It would go so long that even mild stroking would cause me to have an orgasm but in a way that I could feel an orgasm being builded up in my mind and even staring off the screen but feeling that pumping up in my brain (in the edging phase) would trow me of the balance and build up orgasm to the end and cause ejaculation
     
    justapadawan likes this.
  2. Uruvug

    Uruvug Fapstronaut

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    In my case, the kissing does get me aroused, but my penis doesn't always respond to it. I have to start some sort of physical stimulation with my hand or her hand to really get an erection (and that is when it works, because on a bad day not even that can get me hard). I do enjoy the kissing and the foreplay, but my dick doesn't really give a shit
     
    drkarim, justapadawan and Svabo like this.
  3. Reboot16

    Reboot16 Fapstronaut

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    My advice is probably going to go against "NoFap", here but if you guys are in the 50+ day range and are struggling to get an erection when with a woman it almost sounds like you're in a really bad flatline where you basically have no libido. I ran into a bit of a flatline myself during my reboot but not like this - the way I got myself out of it was masturbation - just for experimentation, masturbate a few times over the course of a 2-3 week window of time but keep porn out of it. Just have a nice imaginative sexual encounter with a female you know and see how your body responds. You can always go right back to hard mode if you want and avoid all orgasms if desired, but IMO if you guys are in the 2 month range of no orgasms and no porn and you're not feeling shit for a female, then you might need a jumpstart. :)
     
    Svabo likes this.

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