Just looking at beautiful women makes me cry now

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Ji83j, Jun 11, 2019.

  1. Ji83j

    Ji83j Fapstronaut

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    Hello, I don’t post as much as I’d like but I’m closing in on 30 and I’ve never even held a girls hand, not a single kiss either or relationship of any sort. I’ve never seen a naked woman in real life, only online and recently I’ve been getting more and more emotional.

    I try to stay away from looking at such images but I’m legitimately starting to cry now when I see certain photos of nude women in provocative poses showing everything fully naked. It’s just a sobering reminder of what I’ll never attain, what I will never have. It’s like someone cutting an onion.

    I cry myself to sleep also.
     
    hd47 likes this.
  2. MASTER MONK

    MASTER MONK Fapstronaut

  3. SirErnest

    SirErnest Fapstronaut

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    That's ok.
    You should probably find a therapist to help you (and maybe just your doctor), and at least take up healthy habits like jogging, yoga, meditation. Things that in time will make your life better.
    You're here, so you are trying!
    And stop looking up pictures of women!
     
  4. Women are stupid sacks of meat just like you and I, only your lizard brain tells you they're something special.
     
  5. SirErnest

    SirErnest Fapstronaut

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    Sacks of meat with the ability to plan and improve.
     
    TheBaeLessWonder likes this.
  6. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

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    You've stated what you would like to happen, but what have you been doing to work towards those things?

    What do you do and don't do on a daily basis that has prevented you from having this?

    How often to you meet new people? How often are you outside of the house / work? What activities do you do that allows you to interact with others?

    Tell me this... because most people that complain about a lack of relationships in their life is because they sit around watching tv, eating junk food, and waiting for their life to magically change on its own.
     
  7. Joshua Tree

    Joshua Tree Fapstronaut

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    You say you cry yourself to sleep...
    How much more are you willing to suffer before you decide it is time to change things up? You are the only one in controle of your situation; decide how you want that situation to look and make small efforts toward to create that situation or keep going the way you are doing right now and ask yourself "where will i be in five years time if i keep up the same behaviour? If you find it to hard to take first steps, seek help.
    One last tip: stop feeling sorry for yourself, it won't get you anywhere.

    It isn't easy. But nobody ever said it would be. The best of luck to you!
     
  8. escape_the_drug_

    escape_the_drug_ Fapstronaut

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    bro your mind is capable of achieving anything even the ulgiest most pathetic guy can get a 10/10 girl to sleep with him if he understands the infinite capabilities of the human brain you can achieve anything
     
  9. Occasionally it's good to cry because it gets all your emotions out but it's not good to cry all the time. I can relate to cry when seeing photos because in the past I've done that.

    No, please don't try to a wife. It will be so bad if you do. Try and find a good therapist instead.
     
  10. Coffee Candy

    Coffee Candy Fapstronaut

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    E0155ECC-1106-4791-8B5D-358DEF888C72.jpeg
     
  11. MASTER MONK

    MASTER MONK Fapstronaut

  12. Ra's Al Ghul

    Ra's Al Ghul Fapstronaut

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    Have you turned into Elliot from the movie Bedazzled? lol
     
    BrazilianUser likes this.
  13. 20100

    20100 Fapstronaut

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    Just pay a hooker
     
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  14. Ra's Al Ghul

    Ra's Al Ghul Fapstronaut

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    lol; a bit blunt, but okay. Hahahaha
     
    BrazilianUser likes this.
  15. fapequalsdeath

    fapequalsdeath Fapstronaut

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    Ye listen to this guy! he got some good stuff to say. But for real, I've been in ur situation with the exception that i can't cry... even if i force myself to i can't for some reason, which i don't think is good to be honest. So cry my dear fellow there's no shame in it. The shame would come if u don't change urself and keep crying, idk what's it gonna take, cuz with me this is also an issue but I hope that somehow I'd overcome it. Fuck i probably won't :(
     
    BrazilianUser likes this.
  16. Ra's Al Ghul

    Ra's Al Ghul Fapstronaut

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    don't be an Elliot:
     
    BrazilianUser likes this.
  17. StayClean&Proactive

    StayClean&Proactive Fapstronaut

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    Get yourself out there and interact with people. Go the different events and programs. Step out of your comfort zone. Stop sitting in front of the tv and eating bullshit. Spend time with friends. Start talking to different women.
     
    BrazilianUser likes this.
  18. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    I used to do the same thing, but I stopped and now I see beautiful women (Fully clothed) and think that I have the potential to be with one of those. Feeling sorry for yourself will never fix any kind of problem, it will only make it worse for you.
     
  19. Awedouble

    Awedouble Fapstronaut

    @Ji83j you still with us?

    True fact: There is a 12 Step recovery fellowship called Emotions Anonymous. I don't know much about it, but it's interesting to consider it's possible to be, in some sense addicted to emotions themselves.

    You did say in your OP that it has to do with the idea that you'll never be with a beautiful woman. I've had similar moments, and for me it's been relatively brief but I do recognize it as the same emotional experience, but it's not based on that same idea of not having anyone. Actually, I don't even think it has that much to do with them as a person or even as a body.

    The rest of this may not mean much to you currently but more broadly speaking for the forum in general, I think it may have evolved into feeling the tragedy of the human condition. The same woman I find attractive may have an eating disorder, a traumatic background, or both. Whether I or anyone else who may care and understand may have anything to do with her she may be a workaholic and be looking for love in all the wrong places.

    I mention all this because from what I can tell, it's actually very common when you peer underneath the surface just a little and know what to notice. I mean that's just a sad state of affairs. So I guess what I've decided to do is to have a broader focus rather than try to focus on any individual, whether that's myself and my own fulfillment, a SO (likely in some form of codependency) but just to make a difference in the world. As far as I can tell, that will actually be something significantly different from what whole bunch of people are doing in the world.
     
  20. Angus McGyver

    Angus McGyver Fapstronaut

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    I was in a similar situation as yours only 2-3 years ago (when approaching 30) and although I had kissed a handful of girls at the time and also had the potential of serious relationships with a few of them, those occasions were rare and I was a quite broken, desperate and despaired man overall. Much of it due to the severe poisons and negative thoughts I had fed my own subconscious mind for years. No wonder why things never seemed to work out, progress and go my way.
    During the autumn of 2016, I was hitting the infamous rock-bottom mentally and it was not until New Years Eve two months later that I actually decided to stop self-pitying myself and deal with my struggles like a man, even if it would be hard and take a long time to master and overcome.

    Said and done, at this day (at age 31), I have been PMO-free for almost 500+ days and been facing my demons eye to eye and feel better and more confident than ever. I am not where I want to be yet but I am aware that doing the necessary and overwhelming changes take time and won't be done overnight. Remember that there are thousands of examples of success stories across the globe in which men in their 40's and even 50's and 60's who previously had lived lonely, poor, bitter, and frustrated lives could turn them into the opposite, despite not having as much time left on this earth.
    They wanted to make the most of what they had left and I don't think that anyone of them regret the tough work they had to put in, despite the struggles and pains it took.

    The questions is: What are you willing to put in and sacrifice in order to turn your life around?
    All big lifestyle changes are forgone by a long journey with many small steps and road-bumps along the road and one thing is for sure: if you never act on these desires, they will never become true but if you do at least try, you will get one step closer for every attempt, even the failed ones.
     
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