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I've lost faith in myself

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by lantti, Dec 7, 2017.

  1. lantti

    lantti Fapstronaut

    As the thread says. Thing is, I've meditated today, and thought about work and working and why it's giving me negative response. I came up with the idea of "I just don't do it because I don't have enough strength to do it". That's what I think just before I give up.

    Now I thought about that too, and figured put, that I have physical qualities to do so, It's just that... I've lost my faith. I don't really believe. Thinking even more, I figured out, what was so that I didn't believe in. It was myself. I don't know how many times I've failed, how many times others have failed me, how many times I've got screwed over to be in this state: I really have zero faith in myself. I've tried so much and all in vain, working has become something of zero value because of this.

    Mind you, I do believe in things and I am spiritual. Problem is the continuous failures and disappointments. I have no reason to believe in me. It's a serious hindrance... Any help in regaining my belief in my work?:)
     
    Jynx likes this.
  2. Ginee

    Ginee Fapstronaut

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    Maybe you should try exercising...allocate some time in your daily schedule to sweat it out and flush away all the feelings of dissapointment and failures...for me i need someone to keep me going to exercise...but everyone is different..dont stop believing in yourself
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  3. lantti

    lantti Fapstronaut

    I actually found the answer:) I need to succeed, that'll return my belief:)

    But you're right, exercise, routines and hard work is the key. It's just that sometimes I lose belief in these things...:( World distracts me from those thoughts that I really want to think.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  4. Ginee

    Ginee Fapstronaut

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    Just keep on believing success will come to you as long you want it and work for it
     
  5. Mankrik

    Mankrik Fapstronaut

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    I found myself in a similar situation awhile back. I had lost touch with who I was for a long time and had been making poor decisions. I'll spare the details, but I was at my lowest low and realized I had to change. I decided to do something drastic to set a new precedent for myself. I had been ignoring the positive aspects of myself by drowning them out with short term pleasure. I took all the bad things I had and threw them away to have a fresh start. It was sort of symbolic of my commitment to change. I had acquired over the years lots of things that were hard to get and hard to replace that served my addictions. The glass I used to smoke, the fake I used to drink, and the fleshlight I used to PMO. I was only 16 at the time so it took me lots of time and effort and money to get all these things but I decided that all that work had only set me further back and it was time to get my life on track. I threw all the stuff into the garbage and began a nofap streak that lasted 240 days. Since then I have never looked back and thank myself everyday for having the sense and the discipline to free myself of these vices before things got even worse. You can't change the past but you can change the future. Perhaps doing something drastic can prompt significant change in your life.
     
  6. dustyfields

    dustyfields New Fapstronaut

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    I think you are being too hard on yourself. I think we all are guilty of that but what’s really helped me is realizing failure is just part of life. From all the math tests I failed in high school to my continuing failure to not jerking off to porn so much. I always try to maintain the will to try again.
     
  7. Stay far away from social media, it'll bring you down bro.
     
    EyesToSeeEarsToHear likes this.
  8. EyesToSeeEarsToHear

    EyesToSeeEarsToHear Fapstronaut

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    Check this out.

    Maintaining a simple, easy daily schedule will do wonders for your self esteem and peace of mind. Believe me I've been there.

    Schedule your bedtime and just stick to it, do the same with your wakeup. You'll see how much that alone will clear up your mind and day.

    From there feel free to schedule more aspects of your day as you see fit. Breakfast, work, lunch, recreation, light exercise, bedtime.

    Sticking to any one of those daily will really put your mind at ease.

    You will feel your mind relax and trust more just because you are being consistent with something :).

    It can be the quickest, easiest thing in the world. Just maintain the routine and you'll actually feel the peace of mind I'm talking about.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  9. Arc12

    Arc12 Fapstronaut

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    You lose only when you give up ...
     
    Knighthawk and FeelingFine like this.
  10. FeelingFine

    FeelingFine Fapstronaut

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    Most of us probably felt like that, praying for it to go away and to be protected from those demons. One you store up and refrain, you get stronger and the demons lose their effect. They get tired then leave because their targets no longer allows themselves to be targets. Think of them like a psychopath you know just egging you on to do something. They can't take it when you say, "no."
     
    Knighthawk and Arc12 like this.
  11. eliterexor

    eliterexor Fapstronaut

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    I don't know if this advice will work on you. Everyday you wake up have even 5 mins to be grateful. Thank someone you should be thankful for even if they didn't hear it. After that make 1 goal for this day and try to achieve it. Maybe you want to help someone who really needs help or etc. Minimize your time in social media, I feel that too that the world distracts and we feel low but we should not compare ourselves on what we saw on social media or in tv or what we hear or what we see. WE ARE UNIQUE!
    Always be the best version of yourself. Before going to sleep with a journal on what is the positive things you done today and make a goal that you should do better on what you do next time than today. Most of all don't forget to PRAY
     
    Empty Red Cloud and Knighthawk like this.
  12. Thomas Pawlowski

    Thomas Pawlowski Fapstronaut

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    I went through the same thing for a while. What helped me was not dwelling on my past or my mistakes. If I do something wrong I move on. I don't wait and dwell on it, not even for a second. I forgive myself and move on straight away. I do make plans to change my habits and such. The past to me is something to study and be aware of, but also keeping in mind that it no longer exists. Reality is only in the moment.

    I also believe if what you are doing isn't working it may not be you. It may be that you just need to change your strategy entirely. I think we get caught up to much in what we would like reality to be vs what it actually is. I may not be the superman I thought I was when I was younger, but thats ok. I am a good person capable of achieving good things and so are you.

    I think the people that don't get better are the ones that give up because they don't like to fail. Failing is good, because you can't get better without it. I know I'll be successful eventually. It may not be now or tomorrow but I'll get there.
     
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  13. Thank you for the encouraging words man!! Keep inspiring & keep going!!
     
    Mankrik likes this.
  14. Jynx

    Jynx Fapstronaut

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    Hey there.
    I feel you. I used to be back there in the phase you are right now or so...
    Its your mindset. No matter how hard you work or the overtime. If your mind cant conquered t the drawbacks and negative side effects you will literally fail.

    Know the game is won in the mind.

    Try to workout, exercising and a good dieting.

    Love your work as much you fail...
    Try harder. Failures make you know your flaws.
    Use that and comeback stronger.
    What if you fail ten time or 20x. You still come back every time trying. That's almost winning part.
    And just wait and pray over to god.
    Put God first in the thing you do.
    And see the difference.

    Ping me back.

    Peace.
     
  15. lantti

    lantti Fapstronaut

    Okay, I've been thinking that self-belief issue I've been having. Now:
    I get the hint. I need habits. I need to firstly eat in proper times, sleep in proper times and exercise in some habitual manner. I've already started by stopping night eating and getting to bed in time. Exercise then again is different kettle of fish. I myself like computer, like using it, but it does make exercise seem like chore. Chores in general have become more enjoyable, thanks to no-porn. For MO I need to start doing something physical, like going to the library or something, and for that I need to have eating/sleeping cycles in place. Sitting in front of computer will not cut it.

    Oh man, I love computers :D It is going to be hard to restrict them, or doing something else.

    Do I look like I'm giving up?;) More so, I just don't believe I can continue this way no longer, something needs to change.

    What part of it in specific? something like facebook or twitter, or perhaps youtube? 4chan type of board, or something else? Dating apps?

    I myself use rarely any of these, only exception being youtube, and that I use to listen music as much as i can, with occasional news feed... but mainly music. I tried to buy MP4 player from the store, to have some easy access to music without having phones or computers involved, but it turned out they don't sell these anymore (and you can't download music as much as you can find it from internet)o_O Nofap site itself is social media, and to be quite frank, it's good place to get set into right mindset.

    Giving up youtube, I've tried that, but got so upset in 5 days that I've just relapsed (to that too :D) Ideas are welcome.
     
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