Hi. I ordinarily start by sharing my name, but I guess we kind of shy away from that here. I haven't decided how often I will write, but it seems like daily is a decent exercise, with a short entry. I'm a Christian. I was exposed to porn at the age of twelve, developed an addiction beginning at age 13, and confessed my sin to a close friend at the age of 18. I am 23 now. The road to recovery has been bumpy, unpleasant, and at times discouraging. Part of this has to do with my family history. There was a divorce, and I strongly believe that my mother couldn't love me fully because I reminded her too much of my dad. (He stayed in my life and invested in me and inspired me to a career in illustration.) These past few weeks I've been writing a letter to my mom to try to speak my mind about some things and try to repair the relationship. This has been one of the worst, most unpleasant exercises I have ever participated in, and it's been honestly terrifying. I plan to talk to my dad too. I am a Christian. I believe that spiritual creatures, good and bad, are active on the earth. I believe that evil spirits torment and frustrate men of all kinds, particularly men who are trying to break free of sin and become more effective for the kingdom of God. The letter that I am trying to write, I believe, constitutes such an exercise to breaking a stronghold. My worst relapses and unstable periods have happened around major growth periods of my life, as well as your bog standard addictive manias and stress breakdowns. These past couple weeks especially I have become unstable, and have wasted several mornings before work on pornography where I would normally be investing in my craft of illustration. I have been in communication with my wife about my addiction since before we even started dating. She has been an encouragement in my worst and lowest times. She does not know about my most recent relapses, and I have not broken to her that I want to abstain from sex for a while. I have been starving my heart and spirit of the empowering experience of friendship since starting a new job. I haven't talked much to good family or friends, and I believe that it's been another element of my crumbling posture. I'm reconnecting to the world around me. I'm putting up new fences. I am reaching out and trying to grab hold of the lifeline and start climbing up again. It's time to stop. I'm glad the world is seeing porn for the vicious thing it is, rather than let it go completely unchecked. I'm glad I don't have to feel alone or strange. Let's go forward.