Is this a flatline

Discussion in 'Partner Support' started by lucee, Nov 7, 2018.

  1. lucee

    lucee Fapstronaut

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    Hi new here .2 years ago I realised my partner of 32!!! Years was a PA I think he became addicted maybe .about 6 years prior to this .He had severe PIED and we hadn't had proper sex for about 2 years although we were still intimate. anyway I was distraught. I only found out because I thought there was something phychicaly wrong and searched Google until I eventually found this site I couldn't believe what i was reading he admitted he had been watching a lot of P but never thought it would be a problem to stop so he started talking ED pills so we could have sex until he got better but continued to PMO for the next year and a half I kept finding out again and again He always lied and never admitted anything until I couldn't take anymore and told him to leave. He left for 1 day then we talked he broke down and promised to change so we went to couples counselling and the next 3 months were amazing he was so loving he said and done all the right things. sex
    Immediately got better cos even the pills were starting to loose effect.I had my man back . then the inevitable happened I was prepared for a relapse . I knew to expect it but what was so devestating was he never told me I had to confront him again. I thought we had at least got to the honesty stage then another relapse 1 month later. again I discovered it and had to confront him .so for the next month or so we had sex sometimes without the pills and it was ok but the strange thing was the times he used pills his erections were actually weaker than without until he ran out of them.then ED really set in until the last time we tried and he was really hard for about 10 mins then went completely limp WTF...this hasn't happened since 2 years ago He said he has done nothing but I am highly suspicious. But I am just wondering if this could be a delayed flatline now because the pills stopped his body from recovering naturally? Whatever the cause I told him maybe he just needs longer to recover and to go sex free for at least 4 weeks anyway I can't face going back there trying to have sex with him when he has ED I am now struggling to even cuddle him although I know we should to help the intimacy . until I know he's not lying.i am just so confused and can't accuse him cos I have no prove this time.but I also know he now knows how to cover his tracks and he is now an expect liar.
     
  2. NF4L

    NF4L Fapstronaut

    I can’t speak for your SO, but I can speak about my 2-3 weeks of my flatline experience. For me it was characterized by my penis feeling like nothing more than dead useless flesh. No erections, no feeling, just numb. It was strange considering I Md usually once a day or more. To be honest though, I was still able to perform when the time arose. It just took more intimacy and stimulation than usual. What really defined my flatline was overwhelming apathy. I didn’t care about anything, had no opinions, and was pretty much disinterested in everything. I hope that provides some insights for you. Considering your partners age based upon the time you’ve been together it could be natural ED, to find out if he is a candidate for hormone therapy or something similar.
     
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  3. lucee

    lucee Fapstronaut

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    Thank you NF4L for responding I know I need to take age into account. But although my SO is 53 he is probably fitter than some guys half his age,his job requires constant walking, He climbs mountains as a hobbie (We live in Scotland) and he is slim with no physical health problems and if it was age related ED I expect it would be more consistent, not rock hard one day and then totally limp 3 days later with an on going pattern, anyway I guess time will tell but I do think the pills have just complicated the situation and possibly masked the side effects of PMO, so I just want him to do this naturally and save them for a later date. I know he may well be telling the truth, but this is what happens after lying for so long.
     
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  4. Jennica

    Jennica Fapstronaut

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    Oh, Scotland! Absolutely loved visiting I would love to return one day! Not to side step the thread but Scotland is my most favorite place on earth! The pictures of Edinburgh did not do it justice when I saw the city for the first time with my own eyes!
     
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  5. Trappist

    Trappist Fapstronaut

    My SO has been pretty patient with my PIED as it has taken some time to subside. I’ve got 10 years on your husband and 10 months sober. In the beginning I would loose it half way through. We minimized goal oriented sex. I never took the blue pills, though which may mask and complicate recovery I hear.

    Things are improving.

    Re any lying, keep talking and listening and maybe your observations will tell you the answer.
     
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  6. lucee

    lucee Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for showing your appreciation for our country. I love Edinburgh 's Victorian and gothic architecture,the old winding cobbled streets steeped in history and very atmospheric but I also love the mountains and lochs and quaint little villages
     
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  7. lucee

    lucee Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for sharing this it does give me more hope,I have been patient, but I suppose my SO just needs more time to recover, it's just so hard to stand back and watch something that you have no control over, but I am learning to do this now otherwise I think I would lose my mind
     

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