Is religion a must?

Remove the religious aspects and there are still countless reasons to quit. Just from a humanitarian point of view, how many women are abused in the making of porn? Especially with amateur videos, the viewer really has no idea if the acts are consensual or not, or if the girls are of legal age. Also, no matter how you flip it, watching porn is objectifying women.

 

Good question. In regards to this addiction, I think a middle course can be plotted between religion and atheism. It's a course that both parties can also find helpful, for P addiction obviously has no monopoly on unbelievers. There are just as many believers here suffering from the modern scourge.

The middle way is humanism. It goes to the humanities in order to inculcate in us various forms of belief and aesthetic appreciation [A common theme here is that addicts are vulnerable to P addiction due often to doubt and anxiety]. Art, poetry, literature and philosophy are prescribed in order to develop our taste and judgement. It re-enchants the world for us. This way is all about education. Notice that puritans can lack this aesthetic development as much as the more secular-minded... and this reveals a general lack and void that lays at the heart of modern culture.

Now I have religion [I am Catholic], but I think there a practical dimension to tackling addiction. It is about dealing with our nature, not our mind. And art is a thousand times more effective here than any ideology.

The Inland Sea Knows No Tide

...The inland sea knows no tide.
In Roman villas on Greek isles,
In luxuriant shades they reside,
In Mediterranean style...

I dream in anticipation,
For the seas are calm tonight,
I relax my navigation,
To stare at a sky star-lit bright.

For long familiar with the place
As a destination far off,
Three months ago I left my base
To battle through the troughs.

I make my way by Moroccan coasts
Straight aiming the Gibraltan rock,
Atlantic winds will brag and boast,
To drive my bark back toward the docks.

I didn’t deign to dally at ports,
Nor anchor too long in safe harbor.
Even when I were out of sorts,
Such was the strength of my ardor.

The beckoning lights were sirens no more,
To lure from the long ventured goal,
And I sailed between the closest shores,
By barriers, and shallow shoals.

A few more days, the end is in sight,
Then a channel passage fast-flowed,
There I'll keep my instruments tight,
Once through all's sweet and slow.

Yes, the sea is strangely calm and bright,
Reflecting stars disguise the break,
On nights like this what's more to like,
I could mistake it for that lake.

 

Yes, this is the problem with the modern church today. It lacks the substance of the old classical culture, and instead lays a mere veneer of Christianity over a secular life. This is why so many Protestants/ Puritans struggle with porn today; their passions are uneducated, they have never developed good taste. The Reformation essentially declared war on art. Being the first ideology, it thought it could simply repress passion with rational control [fanatical fervor]. But we all know how passion will break out if unbridled by art. In my opinion, all art is the sublimation of Eros.

 

And this is the beauty of all the theistic religions. They are not philosophies; they take you out of your head, out of your ego, into belief of something beyond. Poetry is also like this, in so far as it creates belief. You find yourself re-engaging with the reality of the world. There is no inner and outer, but a unification of all polarities in a sober symbolism.

P use is like a black hole, a collapse into yourself.

 

And, additionally, megaman, haven't you and the other boys go to Your Brain on Porn website?

 

Just a note here - skeptical and religious are not mutually exclusive. I think a lot of people (not saying you do) so strongly are 'into' their identity as 'rational person' or 'scientist' that being irreligious is part of their persona.

But the ironic thing is many irrationally turn things into religion - like science or reason - (think of the way people people use the term 'science' now 'science says' ... really? ) both are worthy but both are VERY limited.

You might think about religion or setting aside religious time to spend studying the scriptures of a faith ( or go through many) and use that time to contemplate the existence of God - which doesn't mean you have to believe him.

Now all that said, obviously there are plenty of nice atheists, there are plenty successful ex alcoholics and other addicts who are not 'religious' , but to me, it's not just that you can live that way, its that life is more full CS lewis said something to the effect 'if people knew what a joy it was to believe they wouldn't see it as constraining "

 

Yes, I'd agree with this. Perhaps radical belief also requires radical doubt today. What do I mean? Well, think of faith like a clearing. The mind today is so cluttered with so-called knowledge, there is no room for faith [actually the mass mind of today is based on faith in Knowledge]. Criticism is the crucial element [Socrates and Kant are useful here]. My critical reason then operates like a chainsaw to remove the clutter. And only then can the sun shine in.

 

This point of identity is interesting. With logic we know things by identifying them as one thing opposed to another. The knower also must have an identity, which is the rational ego, and then this must, unfortunately, be opposed to other forms of knowing/ meaning such as religion. Yet, a person who is religious or poetic need not be opposed to rational and scientific understandings of the world [which are always changing anyway]. It is more a case of this AND that... having a superabundance of ways in which to understand the world, in contrast to the mind reduced down to the one level. In my opinion, this superabundance in thought is crucial in overcoming addiction because it re-connects us to our passions, and liberates us from our ego. Addictions are in the passions not the mind.

 

Excellent point.

 

Yes, that was my first experience reading about the effects of porn on the brain. In 2014 I recorded and edited a podcast with a guest counselor who spoke about sex/porn addiction, and he'd seen a huge spike in clients since internet porn became widely available. That was where I first found out about Your Brain on Porn. I was sitting there with headphones on, a porn addict myself, hearing that maybe porn use wasn't normal like I had heard my whole life. Later I went and checked out the site I realized this sounds a lot like me. It's a good place to help you understand physiologically what happens to your brain. Once you know what's going on physically, it's easier to recognize your primal brain trying to play tricks.

 

It's easy to do this because as a viewer, we're completely disconnected from the reality on the other end. I watched it over and over without a second thought for quite some time. Later, I started hearing about sex trafficking, something I thought only happens in third world countries. I found out surprisingly, Houston, where I live, is a central hub for sex trade. Quoting from a fact sheet which I've included a link below, "Human trafficking is now recognized as the second largest criminal industry in the world.” It's easy to zone out and see these girls as just objects for your pleasure, but they are real people which may or may not have a choice. I don't have statistics on sex trafficking in the porn industry, but I'm willing to bet it's part of the problem.

http://www.htcourts.org/wp-content/uploads/TX-HT-Fact-Sheet-2.13.13.pdf?Factsheet=HT-TX

http://concernedwomen.org/images/content/factsheet.pdf

 

Definitively not. Stick with science.

 

The problem with science is it can only talk about the brain. In the humanities, you can talk about the self, the sense of self, the way we view ourselves, self-consciousness, over-coming etc. It is in the nitty-gritty of the first person that we need to work our way out of an addiction. A 'third person' view from nowhere just does not cut it.. and gets us nowhere.

 

Science talks about personality as well.

 

I came to Nofap with unfulfilled dreams, sweet promises from childhood, I couldn't seem to realize no matter what I did. I realized, though, that my sexual fantasies were actually the reverse of those dreams - there was degradation where I dreamed of uplift, a kind of begging in squalor whereas in the rest of my life - my real, practical, larger life, I aspired to heroism. So I was always conflicted with myself - a house divided - a car driving 45% in reverse, eking along forward. One doesn't have to look at fap stuff as inherently, objectively, wrong or attach it to dogmatic moralizing. But compare it with your bigger, fuller, aspirations. If you think fap fantasies - your dreams of convenience - are holding you back from your greater, better, long-term dreams, then go see how you might sacrifice the lesser for the greater. I don't feel I need religion in this scenario.

 

Not at all necessary. Can be completely overcome in a variety of ways. Find what works for you.

You could look into spiritual routes as well, but be careful about what you take in. If you're looking for a broadband connection to God, Christians can be the biggest blockage (in other words, they can be assholes). But personally I genuinely believe that a relationship with Jesus Christ and a home in an authentic church community can be an incredibly potent way of overcoming challenges.

Good luck with it. You'll get there one way or another.

 

I sense a very deep and sincere question. Neither the atheist of theist knows what he is saying, definatly there is a creator but how far would you have to look for it. If you follow others they may lead you into a pitfall and leave you there. The trick is to find a path most comfortable to you.
Anyhow untill you'r dieing die you will have to put effort into your petty existence (as far as it is now) , nothing but your will power and strong charachter to stick to your guns will help you to overcome that. OFcourse support and teamwork goes a long way.
Goodluck, !