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Is okay to healthy masturbation without porn?

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Whitemyger34, Jan 22, 2019.

  1. ClaritySeeker

    ClaritySeeker Fapstronaut

    It's great that you don't watch P, but it's not good that you are fantasizing because this will cause the same reward/addiction centers in your brain to activate again and causes you to sexually objectify your friend. So if you can do M without fantasizing that would be great. And it's good if you don't overdue it.
    That's a normal response when you feel tired after O, next time do it before you want to sleep, nice side effect. Anxiety is probably more related to the addiction and that's not normal.
    Never
    Both you and your friend make great points.
    I kind of understand you, I have a fear of STDs as well. What are you worried about specifically as a germaphobe?
     
  2. I just don't like the germs of others and I don't trust that people will be clean so I'd rather just keep to myself.
     
  3. ClaritySeeker

    ClaritySeeker Fapstronaut

    So not STDs?
    If you're worried about general germs from touching, I wouldn't be, it helps build up your immune system. Kissing/sex/sharing food is different. Touching is good.
    But if it's just in general, I think a therapist is definitely a good idea. Your life will be much happier with someone else in it, even if you're an introvert. We were designed to be social creatures, it protects against depression, a shorter life, lower quality of life, etc. The longest living civilizations have a good social support structure.
    Good luck my friend.
     
  4. Masturbation is known in Christian circles as the "solitary sin". You may think you are doing something that just involves yourself and so it couldn't possible be bad - This is actually not the case. The working definition of masturbation is the conscious manipulation of the genitals to receive pleasure (let us not debate words though). Because it involves lust and lust is a perversion of love. Love, as God intends it, is meant to be expressed primarily outwards and this applies particularly to sexual intimacy. There is also a love that we should have for ourselves but masturbation is not meant to be an expression of that kind of love. So from a Faith perspective, no, masturbation is not ok.
     
  5. Yes STDs and I've heard that some people got cancer from having sex... I'm not putting myself at risk for anyone. I'm perfectly happy being by myself... people keep telling me that I need friends or a gf/wife to be happy yet so far I've been really happy being by myself.
     
  6. @Brokenman123 — please take care to differentiate between, on the one hand, rational avoidance of illness (avoid someone with a communicable disease and don't have sex without a condom), and, on the other hand, a phobia.

    So, let's start with the facts (something that our politicians avoid at all costs).

    Solid research has shown us that the avoidance of all germs is in fact unhealthy for you. The body teems with germs on the inside and outside — you have ten times as many germs as you have human cells! Each organ has its own specialised set of germs. Even the skin on your inside elbow has a different set of germs from, say, the skin on your shoulder.

    The vast majority of these germs are neutral; in other words, they do nothing.

    Of the remainder, the vast majority are symbiotic — "good" germs that are there to help us. For example, they help us to digest food, and they aid our immune system to fight off "bad" germs (it's in their interest for us to survive, because when we die, they die).

    The tiny remainder is harmful, and the immune system + symbiotic bacteria easily dispatch most of those. Only the minutest portion of those are actually dangerous.

    In short, if you were to magically kill all of the germs in your body, you would die.

    So, now onto the perception (which politicians love and which your phobia causes).

    It runs like this:

    "Aargh! Germs! They'll kill me! Aargh! Run away! Avoid people! Aargh!"

    Of course, commercial companies love this. They produce cleaning products that "kill 99.9% of all known germs." The fact that using these products makes no difference to using plain soap and water is carefully ignored by the advertising. (Why? Because soap and water also clean off the germs, and then all of the germs, which float around in the air, land on the cleaned surface again within seconds.)

    You can't "catch cancer" from sex. You can catch a certain virus, which can (in rare cases) cause cancer in women, so some countries have started a vaccination program for this.
    "Blue balls", the informal name for this pain, comes from having semen generated (usually from feeling sexually excited). Without ejaculating, it causes a dull pain in the testes.

    As long as the man refrains from excitement (e.g. masturbating without orgasming, watching porn), that pain goes away usually in a few hours, because the body reabsorbs the semen (some men think that this is "semen retention" and creates positive energy. There's no scientific evidence of this).

    But if the man continues (especially edging, which is masturbating to almost the point of orgasm), that pain can get pretty bad.

    That generally happens only when men have severe PE, which is a treatable condition, usually with something like hypnotherapy. Otherwise, it happens only as a nocturnal emission (a "wet dream" or "nightfall"), and for some men never at all.

    In such a case, yes, masturbation — without porn and without fantasy — is suitable. But this should be done only after the addict is sure that he won't relapse.

    Correct. Some ex-addicts can handle it, but others who are still in the trap can't.

    As I said above, the best prevention is not to excite himself with fantasy or porn, and anyway pain goes away by itself.

    Again, correct. It's an invalid comparison. It would make better sense to compare abstinence from porn and masturbation with abstinence from recreational drugs such as coffee, alcohol or crack.

    The only validity of the comparison is that sex (not masturbation) and eating (not overeating) are instinctive, automatic processes in a physically and mentally healthy person.
    Legally, you're probably supposed to tell him to leave it alone as he's underage!
    Medically, the best thing is to explain the options.
    1. Leave it alone. It will release when his body needs it while he sleeps. If he's in pain, he might be watching porn or masturbating; it's not normal to feel pain in such a young child who is sexually innocent.
    2. Masturbate only when needed. Warn him of the dangers of excessive masturbation, and of fantasy or porn while masturbating.
     
    ClaritySeeker and Coffee Candy like this.
  7. Look, you presented some good facts in your post but there are too many risks involved and I'm not gonna risk my health for a few minutes of meaningless pleasure with another person and actually I heard that the number of people who get cancer from copulation is increasing.
     
  8. That's fine, @Brokenman123 . As I said, you can allow your phobia to control you, or not. It's entirely your right and your choice. But only one of those choices is sensible. (And, no, you cannot catch cancer from sex, even from unprotected sex.)
     
  9. ClaritySeeker

    ClaritySeeker Fapstronaut

    How about all the babies masturbating, are they sinning too?
    I think you're talking about HPV causing cancer. The chances are low and you can get an HPV vaccine. Plus, you don't need to sleep around, just find that 1 person you like and stick with them forever and your chances are pretty much 0.

    https://www.cancer.net/cancer-types/penile-cancer/statistics
    "Penile cancer is uncommon in the United States and makes up less than 1% of all cancerdiagnosed in men."
    Most of this is probably occurring in people who have riskier sex.

    Don't let this very uncommon thing scare you away from happiness. At least see a therapist and talk about it with them.
     
  10. How can babies masturbate if their genitalia isn't even fully developed yet?
     
  11. ClaritySeeker

    ClaritySeeker Fapstronaut

    https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/23488732
    Girls who masturbate in early infancy: diagnostics, natural course and a long-term follow-up.
    Rödöö P1, Hellberg D.
    Author information

    Abstract
    AIM:
    To evaluate the natural course, onset, diagnostics and long-term follow-up masturbation in infant girls, which up to now has only been described in case reports.

    METHODS:
    Nineteen consecutive healthy, masturbating girls, diagnosed in early infancy between three and 15 months, were followed up for an average of 8 years. All were diagnosed in the same Swedish hospital between May 1996 and June 2010. Ten girls were videotaped and/or directly observed while masturbating.

    RESULTS:
    Mean age at onset of masturbation was 10.4 months. The diagnosis was based on history taking and clinical observation. Parents reported that masturbation ranged from a few times a week to two-to-fifty episodes a day. Twelve girls had stopped masturbating when this study was written, after a mean duration of 66 months. Their symptoms and diagnostics are described in detail.

    CONCLUSION:
    This is the first follow-up study of girls who started masturbating in early infancy, with a mean duration of five-and-a-half years. Diagnosis may be difficult, but with awareness and knowledge of the condition, a normal physical and neurological examination, a detailed history from the parents and, in particular, video documentation, it can be settled without extensive investigations and the parents reassured.
     
  12. You obviously haven't had children. Their genitalia are… large! It was a bit of a shock to me when I had my first child.

    But even if their genitalia were small, how would that stop them from playing with themselves? Obviously they can't masturbate to orgasm, nor do they try to do so.
     
  13. Babies ------- are not yet at the age of reason. They cannot wilfully sin. But we are all born into sin... what is termed 'original sin'. With the predisposition to sin. You don't have to teach a child to lie or be manipulative ... they will do that on their own. Once the child attains to know right from wrong they are held accountable.
     
  14. Honestly, I've met adults who were unable to reason :)
     
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  15. ClaritySeeker

    ClaritySeeker Fapstronaut

    Too man excuses, glad I'm not religious...
     
  16. Even in the law... there is a distinction between a wilful premeditated act e.g. 1st degree murder and manslaughter. One must posses 'mens rea' = mental culpability plus the action to be convicted of 1st degree murder. If you accidentally kill someone you are still guilty under the law of the land of manslaughter. In religious doctrine there are also these distinctions... you can sin knowingly and in ignorance. God judges according to your state. Everyone else is doing it, isn't an excuse.
     
  17. ClaritySeeker

    ClaritySeeker Fapstronaut

    In my view and in the view of science, healthy M is fine/healthy/natural. Even the creator of NoFap writes:
    https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.p...cessive-masturbation-can-be-a-relapse.175311/

    We agree to disagree and that's fine. You have religious reasons and I have logical reasons
     
  18. Apparently it is possible to get cancer in the throat from oral sex. It is still a mystery to me as to how this happens though (I haven't looked into, but I mentioned it to a doctor and they agreed it was possible.
     
  19. Religious reasons can have a logic too. You can have both logical and illogical arguments in the realm of religion. It stands to reason haha.
     
  20. Thanks for the correction. I learn something every day!
     

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