is fantasising about sex the same as watching on porn?

It is exactly the same neurologically. In fact, you should probably take some time to understand the brain mechanics. Porn=hypersexual thoughts, hypersexual thoughts=dopamine high. Dopamine high for years=addiction, or sensitization of the brain to porn, and desensitization to reality. The fantasy/porn correlation is especially important during the hard 90. During the reboot, we have to avoid not only porn, but all thoughts of sex, because just the thought alone results in a dopamine rush. There has never been a porn addict. This is porn induced dopamine addiction. We are addicted to the rush of dopamine when we think of sex, and nothing makes us think of sex like porn, not even sex.

 

I developed a "distraction technique." This is a combination physical and mental act designed to keep a 2 second sex thought from becoming a dopamine drenched sex opera in your head. Remember, the most efficient reboot avoids using artificial sexual stimulation, of all kinds, even thoughts and fantasies, because by avoiding them, you are avoiding your drug of choice, the dopamine high that follows. Ok, I increased my physical exercise and study during the reboot. I gave myself other things to do, other things to think about. This may be oversimplifying it, but, read a good book. Avoid all potential triggers, meaning a lot of PG movies and ads that use sex to sell. Difficult, but if you try, you will find you really can avoid exposure. My distraction technique though was this: when the fantasy came, I sucked my tongue off the roof of my mouth and made a tick or tusk sound, while mentally repeating "no no no." About a thousand times a day. Be conscious of what your drug is, what your problem is, and what you are avoiding. Currently, due to porn consumption, you are highly sensitized to sexual thoughts, meaning they lead to an easy dopamine rush. By the end of the hard 90, if done correctly, you will have largely desensitized to that mechanism of reaching a dopamine high. Also, get out around people. Put yourself in places where accessing P is uncomfortable. While you are out there with them, interact. A lot of us use porn, consciously or not, to avoid human interaction. You need to push outside your comfort level. Porn is the ultimate comfort food for a porn induced dopamine addict. As Alexander Rhodes says at the reboot camp: you need to get comfortable with discomfort.

Hope this helps.

Peace.

Will I AM.

 

The book Every Man's Battle teaches us to "bounce our eyes" which is obviously not a habit we're used to, but unfortunately it basically boils down to self control. While your fantasizing isn't the exact same thing as watching porn, I'd say its definitely just as dangerous because that's what most, if not all men do when we watch porn is fantasize.

 

The Truth .

 

Tony Lister has an awesome video in which he discusses methods to stop fantasizing. Long video- over 1 hour, info is in the last 15 min.

 

m.youtube.com/watch?v=P2cr2J