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In a dark place

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by RandySpanky, Aug 17, 2017.

  1. RandySpanky

    RandySpanky Fapstronaut

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    Hello Fapstronauts,

    I've been PMO'ing since I was 12, I'm 21 now. I heard about NoFap years ago but I never thought I had a problem. Until I started dating this wonderful, amazing girl who I am now engaged to. I am convinced she is the love of my life, yet I've lied to her countless times about my addiction. On many occasions, I thought I had lost her for good but she kept sticking with me, against her best interest.

    I joined NoFap a month ago when I first confessed to her that I had watched P for a long time after I said I wouldn't again. We set up the account and badge together. I never engaged with this site and its resources because I told myself that'd it'd be easy. My streak lasted 2 or 3 weeks before I relapsed. I've relapsed a few times since then, ranging from Instagram pictures to a binge last night. She caught me the first few times and I just told her about last night, which she already suspected.

    I think I might've finally pushed her away for good this time. I hate myself for lying and hurting her so many times. I need to get control of myself. I'm scared of who I'm becoming and I think I've finally hit bottom. At least I hope so.

    Any support would be much appreciated.
     
  2. Septimus

    Septimus Fapstronaut

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    Welcome Randy, I'm glad you're here.

    I'm sorry about what you're going through with your fiance, I will pray that things work out.

    The good news is, you can turn around (although it's harder than people realize; this addiction is cunning); and you can be a better man. The other good news is that lots of guys just like you are here. I hope you keep coming back.
     
  3. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    Welcome to NoFap where you are amongst friends who are here to encourage you and sometimes challenge you but not judge you.

    The enemy is here to steal, kill and destroy. What are your current strategies for combating the enemy called PMO?
     
  4. RandySpanky

    RandySpanky Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the support guys.

    I read through your advice compilation thread yesterday, D.J. It was very helpful. Currently, I'm doing pushups every time I get an urge. I'm opening the blinds in my place to make sure it's always well lit. I want to make sure I come to the forums at least once a day. Focus my energy on work and hobbies.
     
    D . J . likes this.
  5. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

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