I'm new!

hey everybody! Forgive me, I don't know all the terms and concepts of this website yet but I'm joining because a few hours ago, I (24m) was intimate with my boyfriend (22m) and was really excited because I hadn't orgasmed in about 5 days, but had edged 1-3 times a day in the last 3 days. After bringing myself to climax with him, my testicles seriously hurt (and still do) and I was shocked because I thought an orgasm would be much more pleasant after I had successfully not climaxed. Research afterwards brought me here. I've been watching porn VERY regularly since I was 12, so over half of my life. Since I became regularly sexually active at 19 I've noticed moments of ED that have left my confidence shaken. I've confronted this addiction before but after this painful incident I think I'm ready to begin taking it seriously. I'm happy to see that there is such a genuine community of likeminded people who feel similarly.

 

Unfortunately, my strategies are just willpower at this point. My boyfriend and I have talked about this before and we've expressed that this is something we both want to work on, so I believe I could ask him to keep me accountable, but he's not perfect and I don't want to put pressure on him. I would say my main coping mechanism right now is change the basic routine of robotic bedtime "fap then nap" by reading or doing something up until I turn off the light