I'm at my worst! Need some advice guys!

Been struggling for 3 years now and my addiction has grown.
I'm 28 live with my girl lately I been feeling so weak usually when I say I'm done I can stay away from P at least for a month , in the past 3 weeks i can barely go a day .
The way I M is more extream! I have gotten in wearing my girls underwear to Anal sex today's. Guys I'm going crazy.
It's like when I'm done I don't even feel like I'm me.
It's like it's someone else.
I just need some to talk to.
My addiction is getting in the way of real life. I have so much love and family around me that if they were to ever find out about my addiction it would destroy their lives.
GUYS I REALLY WANT TO STOP THIS FOR GOOD
I cant live like this anymore.
In the past it never use to bring me down for this long but it's getting to a point I can pay attention to what's truly important.
I know I can kill this demon.
But I feel like I do need some help

 

Hey, man. I want to thank you for opening up about where you are and reaching out in humility like this. It’s truly frightening what can come to be attractive and hinder from experiencing life. The fact that you’re taking this grave issue seriously is proof enough that you can be free from your past!! I’m always down to talk and will keep you in prayer for progress in your journey. You’ve got this!

 

We are here, talk to us. You have not given up, this is good.

 

Thanks so much man. Honestly please do I have started to pray as well.
Yout guys support is well needed

 

Hey, The fact that you realize and want to stop by yourself tells me you are addicted and not as weird as you feel!

Ive done stupid things myself so id be open to chat if that could help

 

You’re welcome!!