I need MAJOR help Stopping Sissy/Femdom Hypnosis

I have been into sissy hypnosis for about 3-4 years now. At first, it was extremely "fun" and stimulating. In the beginning, I didn't think I was doing any harm to myself whatsoever. Being "absorbed" into the trance was an easy way to escape life, physical pain, and mental pain (ADHD, depression, Bipolar etc). Over time, day after day, engaging in this sissy/feminization/hypnodomme porn my views on sex, life, selfesteem, confidence, self-love really took a turn for the worst. Several years have gone by, and here's where I am today:

I feel numb, and "dead" inside. My anxiety is through the roof, and I just can't manage this addiction anymore. I've been in a state of denial for a while now thinking that this stuff couldn't cause any "damage" but how I'm feeling/thinking is showing otherwise. I now have generalized anxiety disorder, and I feel as though I have brain damage as a result of looking at all of this negative, harmful material. One thing that doesn't help is some of the hypno videos/audios have titles such as "Fry your brain" etc. I just feel absolutely defeated by this crap and I don't want to dig any deeper anymore. Mentally, this is my "bottom."

One thing that has not helped my addiction is that I take 60 mgs of Adderall per day to manage severe ADHD (This is a essential med for me because I take several other psych meds that cause low dopamine; mood stabilizer, antipsychotic, and a benzo. Without an upper, I suffer from severe restlessness, tight muscles, and severe sedation). Prior to looking at sissy hypno, I was doing fine. Now my daily routine consists of being super hyperfocused obbsessed with preparing for a "sissy session" by spending hours at a time downloading videos and being "stimulated" by using software like photoshop to "enhance" the sissy hypno videos to make the session even more intense. Anymore, the orgasm isn't even the best part at all. The chase and preparing for the session is the actual "high." Another thing too is that I'll "edge" for several hours at a time while seeking out novelty from several videos (multiple windows/tabs open) and being stimulated by searching through multiple hypno videos for hours at a time while edging.

Anyway, I just wanted to give you all a history of my addiction to sissy hypno/femdom. I've been in denial for years, and this is my first time posting to noFAP. I'm posting out of desperation, loneliness, worthlessness, and depression. I used to think that I was depressed or "socially awkward" around women because of my psychiatric diagnoses but I can now honestly say it's all because of the porn addiction.

So, the question is: How do I undo all of the negative programming that this stuff has placed into my mind? I do have some knowledge of the subconscious mind, visualization, affirmations etc. I've read books such as The Secret, You Can Heal Your Life, The Power Of Your Subconscious Mind, Holographic Universe, Law of Attraction, etc.
I've also read the AA Big Book & The NA book. I've read these books replacing the word Alcohol or Drugs with Porn/Sex so it's relevant to my addiction.
I guess I'm looking for an anti-sissy script that I can either use OR make my own script. I just need to be pointed in the right direction. Also, is there any professional hypnosis tracks that deal with this specific issue?
I know that listening to a hypnosis/affirmations track is not going to be the magic bullet that is going to cure everything overnight but I believe it would help. I've just got to work with it and take action by going to SAA meetings daily etc.

I do know this much: I believe that whatever thought/belief/or suggestion has done; it can be undone. With God's help, I just need the strength & guidance to help undo all of the negative poison that's been placed into my mind.

I apologize for the long post, but I am very desperate for help (Sometimes desperation can be a gift). I'm glad that I can share with people like you who may know the pain I'm in and the fear I feel. It feels good to know that I'm not alone, and that there is hope for me.

Thanks for your help & advice,