I need help... Had sex with a stranger and I feel awful

I reside in around SEA in the capital city and there are a lot of foreigners here. I already had a masturbation problem but I keep relapsing because I think I don't tell my problems to people in real life. Anyway, I had a habit of masturbating in the locker rooms shower after a workout and staying longer than I should especially in fancy hotel gyms in the hopes I could cruise for other men willing to have sex. This one foreign guy and I noticed each other in the lockers and suddenly had a sexual intercourse in his room.

Long story short, I had sex with a random foreigner and I felt really awful. It felt seedy following him to his room and it felt diminishing to my self esteem viewing men as sex objects and being viewed myself as one too. We did have safe sex but I'm not gonna be surprised if I turn positive seeing as the rest of the world, HIV is on decline but our country is still increasing in these cases.

I don't think I want to be touched even friendly shoulder pats for now, it feels too weird

 

From what I understand, I should get to know my personality that's obsessed with cruising? Aside from that, should I try to repress it?

 

So the problem is me trying to repress my same-sex attraction. I don't know how to express them, if ever I revealed to the people I know that I'm attracted to the same sex, it's like having a social suicide. I'm sure some people will disown, hate me for it. It also doesn't help the country I live in is quite homophobic, anyone who acts effeminate or gay is pretty much ridiculed by most people.

It's been almost 5 days since that incident, I still have these urges that I want to do it again just for the pleasure. Thanks for the advice by the way. I'm also gonna try to talk to psychologists in real life, I just want someone who actually listens to me in person and to my voice.