I need help about accepting myself.

If you have restrictions do calisthenics. No special gear is required. Convicts conditioning is a good book to start.

 

You've made serious progress against one of the most addictive drugs in modern history. Strengthening your physical body would be nothing.

 

Bruh, as someone who was motivated by you many times in the past, I got a question. Are you scared to get physically stronger?

 

So you have self acceptance issues and you haven't done anything that would lead to developing that acceptance.

You know what to do. You just haven't been doing it.

You're basically rationalizing your way out of doing something that's scary, difficult, or uncomfortable. There's no guarantees in reality. It's all uncertain. You can put in a lot of effort and risk into something and it might not work.

I think that's what you're missing. The ability, willingness, or desire to do something that might not work. To take a risk on something that has no guarantees. Personally, that's where a lot of my self respect comes from. Taking a risk (whether or not the outcome turns out in my favor) is one of the many things I can be proud of. Because uncertainty can be scary. Because life can be scary. And if you decide to go for what you want despite the possibility of things not working out... I don't see how you wouldn't respect yourself more.

So put less importance on outcomes or the possibility of things not working out. Put more importance on doing things that would make you proud no matter what the outcome is.

You may not be a porn addict, but you have some of the same behaviors / mindsets of one. Namely... the need for certainty / instant gratification / comfort / simplicity / guarantees.

 

You can gain progress now, if you do like 25 push-ups right now. Write it down, and set a higher goal for tomorrow.

 

Find something more important than the possibility of failure. More important than the possibility of succeeding even.

Rather than trying to reach the peak of something or to cross the finish line (completion mindset). Think more of a growth mindset where the goal is to improve (and enjoying that progress / development / journey) rather than to finish something for the sake of getting it over with as quickly as possible. The ultimate form of completion is death. Life is all about growth. Find problems you enjoy solving rather than avoiding problems all together.

 

Infra you crack me up so hard some times. This one .... Lool ! Epic sarcasm and truth boiled down into a magic pill.

Love this.

As far as loving your self .... I struggle with this but for for the opposite reason.

I have everyone telling me how great I am and I seem to discount it by their relationship to me.

For example my wife says I’m cute I say—- well you’re my wife you’re stuck.

My mom says I’m handsome and an amazing dad , I say... you realize I’m your legacy you can’t say otherwise.

And in it goes to where the only ppl I believe are strangers.

I would say this, the gym is a good place for you to learn how to love yourself. But so is a dance class. Also a place I have found to enjoy myself is in the barber shop. Lol. Also i have a music group and we try to do stuff in public. Doing that is nerve racking at first but you get a special high from it. A good one because you are helping others. If they have homeless feeding or if you play an instrument Just set up nearby and jam.

You need to appreciate who you are without all the accolades I’ve found.

 

I think the first thing you need to do is accept that you are human.
You are a human: you need to eat, sleep, excrete waste, have a desire to reproduce, etc
There are also flaws with being a human: irrational anger, jealousy, burn out, laziness, etc
When you accept these you can start to accept that somethings are out of your control.
It sounds like you struggle with feelings of adequacy and self worth. Know that these feelings are part of being a human and many if not everyone feels it. You aren't magically going to do something that will change these feelings because it is inherent in who you are. But what you can do is accept it and tell yourself " I feel this way but x,y,z suggests otherwise".
Good Luck