I Need All The Help I Can Get (Shemale Porn)

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Mudkip2214, Aug 12, 2018.

  1. Mudkip2214

    Mudkip2214 Fapstronaut

    For more backstory just read my other posts. I just relapsed about 10 minutes ago.
    I'm so obsessed with my sexual orientation. I can't let it go because I don't believe I'll ever go back to "normal" (normal not meaning just straight, but who I was, I don't have anything against gay people)
    I don't want to live like this, I don't want to die, I just don't want to live like this.
    I understand that I shouldn't reinforce the idea of me failing but my lack of motivation (for anything) and lack of anyone irl to talk to is devastating.
    I read all these stories and everyone is disgusted with it afterward, I don't get disgusted with it unless I did something apart from just masturbating to the material.
    I had an anxiety attack after taking lsd about 2 weeks ago which made me realize how much I hate my life (not suicidal) but my apathetic state/social anxiety make it hard to change it, I don't even know where to start.
    I stay in my room pretty much all day just watching (non-pornographic) videos on my computer. I fucking hate it. I've read almost every success story but they only help me for a little bit. Like it wouldn't be bad if I KNEW I was gay because then I'd know something, but I'm stuck in this stupid limbo that seems to be never ending. I'm so disappointed in myself whenever I do it then think about my family, I feel like a disappointment to them. I wish I never fucking checked to see if I was gay or bi, it ruined me.
    Please help.
     
  2. ReleaseMe

    ReleaseMe Fapstronaut

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    My advice to you is to first, get up and get of our your room. Go for a walk, run, hike, bike ride, or anything else outside. You’ll be amazed at what some fresh air can do for you. Secondly, don’t worry about disappointing other people. Do what makes YOU happy. If you’re straight, great! If you’re gay, great! Just be true to yourself.
     
  3. Mudkip2214

    Mudkip2214 Fapstronaut

    That's the issue, I don't know what I am and it's awful, the porn use makes me "happy" in the moment but afterwards I fall back into the pit of hopelessness and sometimes it I get pulled back into reality and despair while doing it.
     
  4. ReleaseMe

    ReleaseMe Fapstronaut

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    Well that’s the beauty of not knowing what makes you happy...you get to discover it! Go out and try new things. Don’t sit in your room alone. Go explore the world and find your happiness! It might take a bit to discover what your passion is, but eventually you will.
     
  5. Mudkip2214

    Mudkip2214 Fapstronaut

    I'm hoping that I can change it all in my last year of high school, I really hope it will help, thanks for the encouragement.
     
  6. ReleaseMe

    ReleaseMe Fapstronaut

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    You are welcome. You are young and have your whole life ahead of you. Hang in there and keep up on this site. I feel it can really help!
     
  7. Freddiefox

    Freddiefox Fapstronaut

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    After you stay away from PMO your mind will be able to right itself. Then and only then will you know what your real tastes are. Most likely the same as they were before this problem.
    Make a plan and schedule, stick with it. Keep reading here and learn. Admit to yourself when you are slipping up and fight it.
    Find new things to do, a hobby, learning something new, sports.
    Get out of the house and away from being alone with a screen to tempt you. Be around other people, famufa friends.
    You can do this.
     
  8. 19m

    19m Fapstronaut

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    hey im in the exact situation you are and porn has messed up our mind . i sctullay am out of highschool bt always in my toom as well other then when i work . but if your not attracted to men or trans girls in real life then your not gay or bi . i figured that out i just tested myself the ither day ehich i shouldnt have jn real life but men dont make me horny at all . just think of it as homosexauls can also get this where they think they are straight necause of the porn use as well . just lay off the porn and youll go back to normal . i did a 110 day streak and ny shemale fetish was barley there still couldnt get it up for women that much but it may take more then 90 days !
     
  9. Mudkip2214

    Mudkip2214 Fapstronaut

    Thanks for the encouragement, I'm going to fix this when school starts back up.

    Congratz on the 110 day streak, your encouraging words are very helpful.
     
  10. 19m

    19m Fapstronaut

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    thanks that was about a month ago and couldnt stop it’s like for me it’s the last thing i have to give up . i gave up on an amazing women when i was uounger , got rid of all my friends , now this , time for me to change because that women is the only person i care so much for and want to be cured before i get into something serious with her again
     
  11. Mudkip2214

    Mudkip2214 Fapstronaut

    I wish you luck in your attempt, you can do this.
     
    nef likes this.
  12. Uncomfortably Numb

    Uncomfortably Numb Fapstronaut

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    The circumstances of your life may be different to others on here but your symptoms are just the same as everyone else.
    Don't be a slave to it... why are you in your room? Get out and do something even if it's just going for a walk... and on that walk say 'good morning' to people... one of them might just say it back and I guarantee you will feel better instantly!
    Build on that little success
     
  13. 19m

    19m Fapstronaut

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    thank you very much !
     
    Last edited: Aug 13, 2018
  14. nef

    nef Fapstronaut

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    room ? do this write the most powerful quotes large and bold on a paper and stick everywhere on walls
     

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