I miss the light

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by SyrusDrake, Feb 19, 2017.

  1. Clean Plate

    Clean Plate Fapstronaut

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    I'm diagnosed with Major Depression, and ive only had one girlfriend in my life and I think when she broke up with me is when I developed depression and I've never fully gotten out of it. Its been over 5 years since that happened and I'm over her, but can you believe I was so sad that moment she broke up with me that I never asked her why, all she said was "Can we just be friends?" A couple of weeks later she already had a new boyfriend, I felt so hurt then, I started talking to people way less, basically depression took over. Now i'm 23 and I'm getting back into "The GAME"
    Also you can't wait for women to approach you, because it'll rarely happen. You have to approach a girl you like but don't show too much neediness because she will get turned off by that. Play this game for the next couple of weeks to handle approach anxiety to some degree; Whenever you make eye contact with a woman hold the eye contact until she looks away first, its hard im still doing it but im getting better. If she looks down and smiles then shes feeling something that you made her feel in a dominant way, you then may feel the urge to approach her. Do this for a week. There's a book i'm reading to Improve your "GAME" with women, too much info to tell you though, and I got no time to.
    Also find a girl that you can "click" with try not to go for a woman that you want only because shes "HOT"(My advice) unless you just want to get laid, your problem. It's hard when you find out the girl you like is dating someone else, but try not to think about it (that's the easiest way youre going to get out of that depression) Like the guys here said there are literally countless woman out there, who knows you might find another girl who will have a better personality than the girl you have a crush on, trust me you need to move on for now. Remember never limit yourself because youll never Improve "because I have terrible approach anxiety" thats your negative belief system and you are the only one reinforcing that negative belief system. Good luck!!
     
  2. Deadlihood

    Deadlihood Fapstronaut

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  3. Lyart

    Lyart Fapstronaut

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    So.. Is that your excuse not to act for the better ?

    - Learn how to fight anxieties
    - Try to build up a healthy mind set
    - Go see a doctor

    There are always options
     
    Clean Plate likes this.
  4. SyrusDrake

    SyrusDrake Fapstronaut

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    I've heard of this before and tried it for a little while earlier this year. 99% of people are either staring ahead, on the ground or at their phones and don't even establish eye contact. 0.5% will immediately look away and the rest give me a weirded out look. I've never had a girl smile at me on the streets.

    I know. The problem is that I've always been told that sexuality is bad and deplorable. So if I "click" with a girl, if I like her and respect her, I can't see her as a potential sexual and romantic partner.

    My depression has been around for far longer than I've even know that girl.

    No offense, but I absolutely hate the "plenty of fish in the sea" advice... :s

    Uh...I currently am seeing a therapist and working every day to challenge and change my mindset. Surprisingly, healing mental illness is a process and I won't magically be better just because an impatient person on the internet told me so.
     
  5. Clean Plate

    Clean Plate Fapstronaut

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    I know its hard not to be depressed, but I have depression everyday to for no reason (Thats what a mental illness is duh) but if you don't start to change your mindset you'll always be pessimistic. Also what lyrat said is true Have you ever heard of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy or CBT, as your therapist about it, I took a course about it, but my Depression seems to be treatment resistant, so eventually I might try Electro Convulsive therapy or have a cingulotomy. I'm getting off topic with this but I'm also a drug addict who has been clean off of any abusive drug for over 1 year and 3 months now, If you are doing drugs or PMOing then that might be the reason for your depression. Im barely 556 days PMO free so it's too early for me to tell if thats the reason for my continuing depression.
    I used to be like you never being open to new Ideas and giving up but I never settled for less, stop making bullshit reasons up and open your eyes to new ideas, also that statistic you gave was wrong, it's actually 2 in every 10 WOMEN(not "People") will make eye contact with you. "99% of people are either staring ahead, on the ground or at their phones and don't even establish eye contact. 0.5% will immediately look away and the rest give me a weirded out look. I've never had a girl smile at me on the streets."- Try that game out for a DAMN WEEK and Stop thinking so damn negative (youre only sabotaging yourself to fail if you do, I guarantee you ONE girl will look down and smile.

    "Surprisingly, healing mental illness is a process and I won't magically be better just because an impatient person on the internet told me so." -Take my advice from a person who also has depression, I'm glad I never died when I tried to kill myself because I wouldnt know the things I know now If I didn't keep an open mind, that's depressions weakness trust me.
    "The problem is that I've always been told that sexuality is bad and deplorable. So if I "click" with a girl, if I like her and respect her, I can't see her as a potential sexual and romantic partner.- Sexuality is nature/normal but too much and you come off as a pervert. What are your goals with women? If you like her and respect her you'll always be put in the friend zone, the sad truth and youre doing that to yourself too(thats why you can't see her as a potential sexual and romantic partner).
    Also Depression = an imbalance of Logic and emotion, meaning logic loses and emotion wins. Some of your reasons for not approaching women and how you see yourself are illogical if you really think about it, challenge those negative beliefs you got instead of outright believing them.
    so anyway I stopped complaining and I'm glad I did, because I'm starting to feel better now at this point in my life than Ive ever had(with depression), think about my advice and don't even think about complaining(that negative/depressive cycle about oneself can be controlled!) to my post without thinking thoroughly about what I've said, good luck bro.
     
  6. I just saw this but I'm confused too lol
     
    HopefulChristian likes this.
  7. Deadlihood

    Deadlihood Fapstronaut

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  8. Deadlihood likes this.
  9. Deadlihood

    Deadlihood Fapstronaut

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    Lord Zelda was his first(?) username used online.
     
    Lazarus Shuttlesworth likes this.
  10. SyrusDrake

    SyrusDrake Fapstronaut

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    Uh, I think you might have misunderstood me. I did try that "game" for almost a month. No girl ever even looking at me, let alone giving me a smile isn't some pessimistic expectation, it's just what did happen during that month...
     

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