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I miss jerking badly....

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by Deleted Account, Jan 13, 2019.

  1. I’ve been in a relationship for over a year now, and naturally, I was no longer able to solo masturbate after we moved in together a couple months ago. I then started NoFap a month and a half ago. I sometimes really miss just being alone and playing with my dick. Feeling all of it, every area. Stroking it and getting off by my own hand. We know our own bodies so well. It’s so difficult giving all of that up for a relationship and NoFap. I don’t miss the porn at all, I just miss having a solo connection with my penis. I remember now when i was younger and first starting jerking and how great it felt. It’s making the NoFap even more difficult. I feel kinda depressed today because of it. I miss that alone time with my cock. I can fight the urge easily now, but thinking of the old great times me and my buddy have had together, makes me want them back.
     
    nerd_lean likes this.
  2. There is that.

    Missing an ‘old friend’
    is not uncommon.

    It is a clever way to sooth;
    Yet a “piss poor” friend is that.

    Try focusing on the good things
    you are bringing in.

    Remind yourself of the crap PMO brings; write this part down.

    Feed the things you want.
    Walk away from
    the things you don’t
    Want.
     
  3. ClaritySeeker

    ClaritySeeker Fapstronaut

    How about having sex? I'm wondering, what was your reason for starting NoFap?
     
  4. I was doing hookups and jerking to porn before the relationship. It hurt our intimacy the later things went on in the relationship. I had to be manually stimulated to even get a boner. I wanted to be able to get hard just at a thought or beginning of intimacy. I don’t have a clue what it’s like to have real intimate sex. And yes the NoFap is becoming a problem right now. Because I’ve been in the “dead zone”. No libido at all now. I’m waiting on the reset. I have to go through this no matter what. Or I’d never be at my sexual peak in this relationship. Our sexual part would always suffer. I had no choice but to clear out the past bad stuff that was affecting my brain and penis in a negative way. It’s all very complicated and difficult...
     
  5. Philgr47

    Philgr47 New Fapstronaut

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    I know exactly what you mean. I have also always cherished my private relationship with my penis. Even in the best part of a relationship, I need to be jerking it from time to time. I figure it is a way of connecting with my introvert self. I dont know if that makes sense...
     
  6. I’m trying not to. I used to jerk it multiple times a day, but not get off. Because of my relationship. I didn’t want to get off if we were going to be sexual later in the day. I cherish my relationship with my dick too lol. I miss the days when I’d just whip it out any time and get off. Any time I want, anywhere I want. Just play with it. I know I can’t do that anymore though. I love my dick, and balls. I’m in withdrawals now, not being able to do stuff alone with them.
     
  7. We’ve talked about me doing this NoFap, my past and the fact I don’t feel anything sexual right now. It’s not easy. Especially when your partner has no sexual issues and starts feeling like you don’t like them anymore...
     
  8. We’ve talked about all of it. There’s understanding there.
     
  9. ClaritySeeker

    ClaritySeeker Fapstronaut

    Give it some time, it takes time to reboot your brain. Hang in there. I also wouldn't edge it'll lead to PMO and take longer to reboot. Good luck Gambit23
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  10. The Wrestler

    The Wrestler Fapstronaut

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    Why is it a trade - masturbating for a relationship?
    What does the significant other think of this?
     
  11. Because in my mind, I need to save myself sexually for my partner, for when we have sexual activity. We both do it. This is NoFap isn’t it? I’m not sure why not jerking is even a question here.
     
  12. I am open with my wife and she is with me. We learned a few years back that we both masturbate. I don’t think it surprises your wife or gf to learn this. Also if you jerk off a while before sex you can last longer.
     
  13. The Wrestler

    The Wrestler Fapstronaut

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    Not everyone does it that way. I've given up porn and feeling bad about myself, not masturbating.
     
    ClaritySeeker likes this.
  14. ClaritySeeker

    ClaritySeeker Fapstronaut

    I do the same thing. No P, M infrequently without fantasizing.
     

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