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I feel like I lost everything

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Yusuke7711, Oct 28, 2017.

  1. Yusuke7711

    Yusuke7711 Fapstronaut

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    I lost my girlfriend of 2+yrs last year and have never been able to cope with it. She was my world and now I feel like I lost everything. I've tried moving on, tried meeting new people whether it be to date or to be friends with me only having a little luck with the latter. I feel pretty worthless and at a lost for what the future may hold for me. I hate the situation I'm in and the only reason I'm in it was because of a nasty porn addiction that ruined my otherwise great relationship. If it wasn't for that I would still be in a perfectly happy relationship.

    All I see now is everyone else happy in relationships and I am sitting in the sidelines watching and hearing that everyone else's dreams come into fruition as I wallow in sadness. What am I supposed to do and how can I stop hating myself for ruining the good thing I had? Someone please help.
     
    FollowYourBeard likes this.
  2. Hi Yusuke7711!

    It's heartbreaking to hear your story, losing a significant other can be devastating. Being lonely at that time is even harder. Jung used to say to people who lost a job or sth like this, great! Let's open the champaign! There is no better time to change than when everything is not as it supposed to be.

    I am here for you! Everything will be ok, just hold on and do some inner work with me.

    You are brave trying to fight off the thing that broke your life in the past! That's the right thing to do!
     
    Yusuke7711 likes this.
  3. TotalLifeChange

    TotalLifeChange Fapstronaut

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    I know this can be a bit counterintuitive, and use this at your own risk, but I'll share it in case it helps.

    Emotions can be classified in a scale, depending on how much energy those emotions give you.

    If you are depressed, anger and hate will give you more energy than depression.

    Here's an exercise, you can do it in writing or in meditation if you like. If you are not used to meditate, just write it down on paper but try to think and feel what every sentence means.

    01. Write a list of 10 (or so) reasons why you are depressed, just like you shared in this thread.
    02. Write a list of 10 reasons why you are angry at her.
    03. Write a list of 10 reasons why you are angry at yourself.
    04. Write a list of 10 reasons why life will go on nevertheless.
    05. Write a list of 10 reasons why you want to move on.
    06. Write a list of 10 things you have fun doing (not P, obviously.)
    07. Write a list of 10 reasons life is worth living.
    08. Write a list of 10 things or experiences that relax you.
    09. Write a list of 10 reasons you can be courageous.
    10. Write a list of 10 reasons you are willing to take control of your life.
    11. Write a list of 10 examples of you being an intelligent, calm, and wise man.
    12. Write a list of 10 reasons why life is amazing.
    13. Write a list of 10 beautiful things in life.
    14. Write a list of 10 things you are grateful for in life.
    15. Write a list of 10 things you love in life.
    16. Write a list of 10 reasons why you are a powerful man.
    17. Write a list of 10 things you look forward to.

    If you are tempted to do the exercise, don't be lazy and skip steps; take your time and do it exactly as I described. Just focus on the next list, one at a time.

    Let me know how it goes.
     
    Yusuke7711 likes this.
  4. Yusuke7711

    Yusuke7711 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks I'll try doing this later.
     
    TotalLifeChange likes this.

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