I am successfully doing Nofap but I'm alone

Hey great that you're doing so well with your NoFap streak and also with putting yourself out there! Every time you go out and talk to girls you're gaining experience. The girls that you talked to but it didn't work out, that doesn't matter, they don't matter. What matters is that you're getting better. You're getting more ready for when the time does come.

One criticism: You sound a little bit needy. A waman isn't going to complete you. Just keep doing what you're doing, keep improving, that's all that matters

 

This. Your neediness was almost palpable while reading this. And I know exactly how that feels, don't get me wrong. I've been there many times in my life and I am not blaming or shaming. Just to be clear.

But it is important that you know that. Generally speaking, that kind of neediness consciously and/or unconsciously repels people.
It's not healthy. And in fact, it actually attracts malicious narcissistic or anti-social people who can sniff that kind of thing out 12 miles against the wind. So be careful.

Again, I've been there for many years and know how aweful it feels and how badly you want to get out of it.
Some days I just gave up and tried to accept that I will probably never have a fulfilling relationship.
And it's not like you can simply flip a switch and just not feel needy all of a sudden.

But what does help is what you are already doing man. So keep your chin up. It's going to happen. Consistency is key.
It helped me to tell myself over and over again that I am bound to build connections in my life if I keep at it. Preferrably with a good plan haha
Remember that all of us crave connection with other human beings and it is completely natural to do so. Just like it is natural to feel hungry if you have not eaten in a while.

And even though most guys don't want to hear that because they are hella thirsty, especially when it comes to the neediness (but also for so many other important reasons) it is extremely helpful to just build connections in general.
And best if you start building a small group of guys around you with similar interests.

I wish more guys would do that instead of going right for the girls. But I know all too well how alluring that is haha
But what SuperFurryThing said about waman is super true. Please consider that.

If you need any more help or someone to talk to just send me a pm. I am happy to talk and help where I can.

Best wishes for you on your journey man!

 

Keep trying.

 

Humans are social creatures; if that weren't the case we would be solitary, like tigers and bears. It is only natural that and we crave affection and companionship, and get upset when we feel lonely.

Like you, I've had a major confidence crisis recently, and I understand I'm not going to attract anyone in this condition. I've given up on relationships until I get other aspects of my life sorted, though I realize it will be months, years even, before I'm 'good enough'.

As above, keep trying. It's all a man can do really.

 

I am in that mindset right now, where i am desperate for a girl, but one thing i realized is usually when i feel like this i am usually unhappy about something in my life, and that leads to these feelings. Because when i was at my best before i relapsed recently, i had no desire for a companion, and i am unhappy about a lot of things right now so that is likely why the lonely feeling came back.

 

Try reading dating advice books and watching videos on this by both men and women. It has helped me tremendously.

 

Recently, I've heard it put this way: Arthur comes around and pulls the sword out of the stone and thinks "Now I've achieved my destiny and everything will change!" But then he realizes that he's still Arthur and nothing is different except he now has a sword. (source in case you'd like to see more words of wisdom like this)

It's easy to set our mind on a task and to try to accomplish it, but in my experience, it's never as satisfying the day after I've achieved my goal as I thought it would be. Rather, it is in the daily successes and experiences that leave me feeling the most fulfilled. It's awesome that you are getting out and interacting with people! Enjoy that time and live it! Don't be sad that the day ends and is over, but rather be glad that it happened and look forward to your next adventure each day.

Best of luck!

 

This is the best way I've seen someone put it.

What everyone is saying is true, neediness is unattractive to most women (not going to say all). I just got rejected from a date I was looking forward to and feel crumbling inside. I've never been an avid user of forums and yet NoFap is something I enjoy coming to and reading about other people's experiences. And it all has to do with connection. I starving for a meaningful relationship with someone, and probably even friends. And I am also making an effort to go out more and find that.

It's natural that you want to connect with someone. Go for it, do it. Just be confident, not needy, even if it's what you desire the most out of everything in life. Find people who you can connect with, and maybe you'll end up in a relationship with someone where you both connect at a deep emotional level.