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I’ve figured it’s about time to do this.

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Faithe, Apr 16, 2019.

  1. Faithe

    Faithe Fapstronaut

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    I have looked at this website every now and then for the past few months and I think it would be good for me to finally get involved in this community. So, I guess just to introduce myself:

    I’m a 17 year old girl and I have struggled with an addiction to PMO since I was about 9 years old. I got my first computer for Christmas when I was about 9 and I ended up discovering, well, you know what. I didn’t understand it, but it made me feel that “certain way” and I tried imitating it. And I think that’s pretty much where the addiction began. By the time I realized what I was actually doing, it was too late. And so I’ve been addicted for about 8 years now, and for about half that time I didn’t go more than 2-3 days without PMO or MO. Sometimes it happened every day. It wasn’t until recently that I have really tried to reboot. Sometimes I go 2 or even 3 weeks without it, but not much past that. And for some reason, my urges have become stronger and more invasive and I have relapsed much more frequently than before. Sometimes the thoughts distract me from class lecture and I have to excuse myself from the room. I ended up relapsing again about an hour or so ago, and I was so heartbroken. I told myself, “Enough. You have to change something.”

    I think joining this website will help me feel some accountability and help me overcome the addiction. So many of my childhood and teenage years have been consumed by it and I just want to have my life back. I want to enjoy the little things again and not feel this sick feeling of guilt and disgust with myself. I want to be able to enjoy sex with a possible future husband and not feel dissatisfied or guilty. And most importantly, I want to do this so that I can get right with God. I’m so sick of repenting every day for something I know I can control. He has gotten me through my hardest times in my life and I feel awful knowing that I’m still not taking proper care of my body like I should. I’m a daughter of God, and I want to feel like it. I know that this journey might not be a smooth one, but I think it’s one that I need to take.

    I’m so thankful that this website exists. :emoji_slight_smile: I really hope that it helps me.
     
    jw2021 and (deleted member) like this.
  2. nef

    nef Fapstronaut

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    Welcome to this forum try to find partners in female category maybe you find male ones too I didn't know about girl addiction better ask girls for help nevertheless it is never late to start so let's begin I'm sure you will able to defeat it and regain your confidence for a better self
     
    Faithe likes this.
  3. Hello and welcome! I sure wish I figured all this out when I was your age. You’re very wise! I’m glad you’re here. There are plenty of wonderful and knowledgeable people here to help you along the way. Maybe try journaling in the “women in reboot” section. I wish you all the best :)
     
    Faithe likes this.

  4. I love the quote you said: “ I hate repenting for something I know I can control.”

    For we are more than conquerors in Christ.

    I want to encourage you, I have been on this site for a grand total of 4 days and I am trying not to beat myself up for not having a consistent streak but if you want to replace the activity with something positive I have found focusing on what I eat, measuring my weight or anything to take care of my body puts me in the path to care about myself and face this monster.

    You can do it. Phil 4:16
     
    Faithe and Deleted Account like this.
  5. Faithe

    Faithe Fapstronaut

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    Thank you so much! Yes, I know we are all in this together, even when it’s tough. I trust that Jesus can and will give me the strength. And thank you for the suggestion :)
     
  6. Faithe

    Faithe Fapstronaut

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    Thank you so much! I will try journaling with the other girls in the future. Thank you for the suggestion and support!
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  7. welcome to the forum faithe! :+) good luck on your journey
     
    Faithe likes this.
  8. Faithe

    Faithe Fapstronaut

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    Thank you so much!
     
    Coffee Candy likes this.

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