How to take action and start conversation with girl?

sad.........i m 30yr.... i havenot kissed /touched a girl yet.

 

Feels sad bro

 

I'm 28 and went on my first date ever last Friday don't be ashamed of your past it doesn't define you take the steps necessary today to be where you want to be and enjoy the present moment if not you will perpetuate the guilt from your past and create anxiety about what the future holds I'm learning to practice it's very tough we as humans want things and people to make us happy but are true happiness lies within ourselves

 

If you mean with a known girl, just go there, say "hi, how are you", have fun with her and ask her out for what you want! The more original you think the more is good for you.
If you mean with a stranger...the same way, but i have no experience to talk about it

 

I posted some thing on "the introverts guide to flirting" might help u. I'll look for it.

 

https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/how-to-flirt.89106/

 

Ok, so a few things

Cold approaches are a skill. They are hard and scary at first. And it's possible, even with experience, to fuck them up. So practice practice practice. You are by definition approaching a stranger, so if you fuck it up, then you never see that person again. Open conversations with strangers is always about peacocking, either you or them. Comment on something. "I like your shoes. Where did you get them?" This is the real reason people put their interests on their shirts.

"The Red Wings are an awesome team, bro! Are you going to watch the game tonight?"
"You like Attack on Titan also?"

For a person that you see everyday, you can save it until you have more confidence. Not too long though. If you suspect she likes you, then literally ninety percent of your job is done for you. If you're asking about how to approach her without seeming creepy, well you didn't tell us how you know her, but its as easy as asking her questions. To start a conversation, talk other people while your around her, and turn it into a debate. Then, turn to her and ask her opinion. "How about you? Would you rather fight a shark or a bear?" Then, ask her questions that keep her talking. "Why?" Then after she's talked for a while, "You should ask me a question."

And for the love of @Ypow don't get caught up in that you're talking to this glorious creature you've thought about so often. Don't think about the individuals steps of walking either. You'll get tripped up.

You're welcome

 

There's a girl who might help...

 

This isn't even a cold approach. This girl is literally screaming out for you to approach her.

If you leave it any longer she'll either think your not interested or too scared to approach her, depending on eye contact, body language and facial expression/micro gestures.

She thinks your too scared to approach her, you'll loose value in her eyes, and your gonna make it a hole lot harder when you do, or completely miss the opportunity all together. This shit has a half life.

When you do approach her, focus most of your attention on positive, open, confident body language, facial expression, smile, eye contact etc. and tone of voice. Don't place too much emphasis on what you say. Literally look for any fucking excuse to say something to her and just role with it. Make sure your relaxed and don't tense up. Trust me on this. 55% of all communication is in body language, 38% vocal tone, and only 7% in what you actually say.

Attract, build comfort, Seduce.

 

TBH, I've never paid any attention to women teaching pick-up. That might seem counter intuitive. Fact is, what a women says she wants and what she responds to emotionally in reality are completely different things.

She'll say she wants someone who treats her with respect and someone she trusts. Next she's fucking someone who is the complete opposite of what she SAYS wants. Clearly that isn't what she responds to.

Women are not logical creatures. They act based on their emotions and backward rationalise after the effect.

She'll give a million reasons why she shouldn't sleep with a guy, and then a million reasons why she did afterwards.

A girl I slept with resently, changed her fb status to relationship the day before we slept together. That's pretty fucked up. And she was the one who called me, too.

The only advice I've ever taken is the battle hardened experience of those that have learnt it first hand the hard way out in the field sarging.

 

I think it's simple.
Just be curious and ask about who she is as a person, ask questions about her, but also include some information about yourself. Its better to be interested than interesting.
Also, don't be afraid to talk about any topic. I hope this helps.

 

Don't pray for a gf, pray for bigger shoulders to handle that feel.

 

When I talk to women it helps me to always keep in mind - no matter how attractive she is - that she's just one amongst millions and millions on this earth. Sure maybe down the road I might change my mind and see her as someone special, but imagining this kind of romantic stuff when you're first getting to know her is totally disastrous and makes guys stiff and awkward since they put too much pressure on themselves. I know from experience.

Much better to see any interaction as totally casual and fun, an opportunity to chat and harmlessly flirt a little, and maybe get to know a bit about them. Don't try and impress them about yourself, this just comes off as insecure, instead playfully interact with her and find out what she likes, preferably with open-ended questions that can lead to further conversation (look up some examples online to see the difference between closed & open-ended.) If the interaction doesn't go anywhere and she seems disinterested, fine, no biggie, just move on to the next girl. But if she opens up about herself a bit and even starts asking questions about you in return then you can take that as a positive sign and see where it leads.

 

Im learning to be in tune with my body more when I interact with people in general it was a powerful revelation for some one like me who started struggling with women and social interaction after college I notice that when I pay attention on my breath and body and feel that slight bit of anxiety to feel that energy and accept it and ease your body and breathing and whatever you wannna say unconsciously comes out because you're relaxed I'm gonna try to practice this a lot more it's all about living in present and bringing awareness to your body I use to think it's all about what you need to say and would overthink and still do but this great advice

 

I need to begin meditating again. I've found it hugely beneficial in the past. It's ALL about being in the moment.

Just a random point I'll make to back up what I'm saying. I can remember being in set when I use to go out and sarge regularly, and I'd make a point of talking absolute rubbish to the girl to see if I could get it to hook, and also maintain the conversation. We use open girls by telling them how much I love salad. Mid-conversation, other times I'd cut the thread and start talking about clocks, lol, just to see what I could get away with. I'd still get the girl. It was alot of fun. If you say anything with enough conviction, people will believe what you say and fall under your frame.

 

This. So much this. When it comes to emotional matters, women (people in general actually) NEVER say what they want that will make them emotionally satisfied. This is due to two reasons: either they don't know, or they know that saying what they want makes receiving it much less special.

Say you buy your girl flowers out of the blue. Chances are she'll be happily surprised...unless she's allergic. Then you have a medical bill, and you'll argue about finances in the ER.

Now, say you have an argument, and you ask her what would make her happy, and she says flowers, while you both are pissed. Even if you buy her flowers, it would mean nothing. She'd probably throw them at you, and now you have to go back to the ER because the flowers had thorns.

TL;DR

Don't listen to women's emotional complaints. The mere fact that she is complaining is a problem us guys have to figure out on our own. Whatever you do to make her feel better, make sure it is a surprise, and not something she yelled at you to do for her.

 

HEY !

I posted something related to your thread about " cold approaching someone today " in the dating folder. I did breath deep into your balls , feel the feet beneath you to feel grounded , spot something on her that is of genuine interest to you , a cross fit shirt , or a band tee , or a handbag brand that is against animal skinning , and just go up and say hi , ask for her name and state " I want to come up and say hi because I find you kinda cute " and talk about object of interest. Say calm , don't minimize yourself , don't prove yourself by overselling. Practise , it all starts with your inner self before you interact with anyone.

 

Never qualify a girl based of her looks. Girls get it all the time. Be the exception to the rule.