How to make women like you and stuff

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Selix, Jul 13, 2019.

  1. Selix

    Selix Fapstronaut

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    I came to a point in my life where I connected fully with myself.

    now there is this one girl in the same floor of my office who really locks her stare at me and that makes me feel unconfortable and makes me check my face for stuff, she even smiled at me and I saw from the eye angle that she was "fixing" her hair and maybe even her bra while I was getting a coffee from the coffee machine but I'm not sure

    now she ignores me and I'm like wtf did you stare at me in the first place?

    does anyone of you can link me something useful to do some research or give me some advice?

    and yes I have absolutely no clue how to deal with or make women like me.

    I want to step up my game and stop crying like a little bitch that I dont get any girlfriend.
     
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  2. properWood

    properWood Fapstronaut

    Doesn't sound to me that you are fully connected with yourself, otherwise why would you react so anxiously around another person (in this case a woman)?

    Forget about making women like you; if they make a move, then react. Going after women will steal your attention away from other things that make your life worthwhile. I don't know of any famous person that says "I'm happy I made so many women like me" or "my life is now fulfilled, I was liked by 20 girls".
     
  3. eryuz

    eryuz Fapstronaut

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    dude she was giving u hints but u missed it. she thought that youre a real MAN a you would step up and approacj her but you didnt, i dont know why. that is some IOI and u shouldnt miss it. but its not late, you should ALWAYS try. go ahead and approach her, ask her wow i’ve neer seen you before or get a cup of coffee and go to her desk. just approach like a REAL MAN and try to get what you want. dont cry like a 5 years old girl(at least theyre cute man youre not lol) go and get her TIGER! go! dont wait!
     
  4. RobbyGo36

    RobbyGo36 Fapstronaut

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    I'm a bit torn on how to respond here. If this chick works in your office, its basically not a good idea to hit on her. Things could go south for you if she finds your advances unwelcome and you end up in a HR sexual harrassment meeting, putting your job on the line. Even if things go well and you guys date for awhile, what if you break up? Now theres tension and emotional spillover into the workplace. It could get ugly, and you could lose your job. There are a few more scenarios that aren't coming to mind, but believe me, they all end with you losing your job. Just accept that any sexual harrassment situation that involves you (a man), is a situation where you are at a severe disadvantage and could lose. Its just the way things are.

    On the other hand, you sound like a young guy with not much work experience and if you think she's worth your job, then go for it!
     
    Last edited: Jul 19, 2019
  5. eryuz

    eryuz Fapstronaut

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    maaan... youre thinking too much. thats not how it works
     
  6. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

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    What's causing you anxiety and hesitation is that you want to manipulate things so that you attain one specific outcome with this one specific person. You're looking for a guarantee / perfect method / a technique that can't be rejected / an ideal set of circumstances, all of which doesn't exist in reality. So your ideal image of how things are supposed to be is conflicted with how reality works which creates resistance. Your mind becomes overly cautious, excessively careful, and plays not to lose. Therefore you freeze and go on a journey to find the magic fix before taking any action. An action that is simple and clear, but your mind wants to make it more complex and scary than it really is.

    Your ego tries to protect itself. It doesn't want to be rejected. It doesn't want to fail or make mistakes. It doesn't want to look bad. So it comes up with all sorts of scary images in your head to prevent you from taking any action.

    The short term solution? Allow her the choice of what she wants to do and allow yourself to go for what you want. It's her choice whether or not she wants to accept your invitation into your life. Do something bold and daring that might not work. Accept that there's no guarantees and go for what you want anyways. Let go of your immature need to control everything. The people most successful with relationships and social interactions are those that are comfortable with possible rejection and negative experiences.

    The long term situation? Become someone that you like rather than trying to force others to like you. Allow others that don't like who you are to move on as quickly as possible while being receptive to people that are interested in who you are. Be around people more. Interact with them more. Not just women. Young and old / tall and short / big and small / male and female / etc... all sorts of people... you'll eventually realize that women are people just like everyone else and that you don't have to be so afraid of others so much.

    People are drawn to those that have self respect rather than those that need validation from others.

    As for being good at interacting with women... become someone that's very good with women that like you for who you are and very bad with women that don't like you for who you are. The problem happens when you try to get everyone to like you and thus acting like someone that you're not in an effort to convince others to validate you because you're unable to validate yourself.
     
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  7. RobbyGo36

    RobbyGo36 Fapstronaut

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    And you're not thinking enough. Workplace relationships do happen all the time, but I've not heard of many that ended well. Hence my advice. Best not to shit where you eat. Plenty of other places to find women (and men).

    If you're in a job and you're in your teens and early 20s, this may seem like needless advice, but it does matter. It happens all the time. It doesn't look so cute when you're out on your ass at 50 for trying to chat up the temp, and then having to explain that at your next job interview. So, best not to start now.
     
    Last edited: Jul 13, 2019
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  8. Selix

    Selix Fapstronaut

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    this is what I needed... thanks a lot

    thank you for this point of view, I wasnt thinking everything through
     
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  9. greenishmoon

    greenishmoon Fapstronaut

    A beautiful yet simple arrangement of words. I think this is spot on, OP, you should take that advice (well, I should at least!).
     
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  10. lvcas

    lvcas Fapstronaut

    elevate, you’re brilliant. This is essentially the gist of it. I wish you the best of luck, OP.

    lb
     
  11. mgz069

    mgz069 Fapstronaut

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    You dont "get women to like you".
    This is some bullshit advice from the "pick-up line" and "trying to be alpha" community.
    Do yourself a favor and read this book. Models: Attract Women Through Honesty
    It's the exact opposite of what you have in mind.
    There is no correct sentences to say, no proper lines, no posture and body language control, no psychological tricks, nothing!
     
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  12. It seems like she is interested (sending you signals), but is now moving on because she thinks you're not interested (because you didn't make a move.) I would try talking to her. Don't think of it it like you're going to make her like you. This is manipulative and it's probably causing all that anxiety (way too much pressure on yourself.) You don't approach women to ask them out or to get them to like you. You approach to talk to them to find out what they're like. I would look at it like it's practice, to get over that fear of talking to and approaching women. Baby steps.
     
    mgz069 likes this.
  13. Augie

    Augie Fapstronaut

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    Lots of great advice on this thread.


    For some reason whenever I hear the sentence “how can I get women to like me?” I think of a used car salesman asking his colleagues “how can I persuade clients to purchase a lemon?”
    1FDBD020-3F8F-43D5-B861-91C5DB369C41.jpeg
     
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  14. mgz069

    mgz069 Fapstronaut

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    i think of this
    [​IMG]
     
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  15. properWood

    properWood Fapstronaut

    Joey Tribbiani: "How you doin'...?"

    joey.jpg
     
  16. Selix

    Selix Fapstronaut

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    well I hereby admit that I am not ready for this yet

    I'll let her go and I am gonna "fix" that anxiety problem of mine

    at least now I'll get noticed by women :D
     
  17. Jimmy Johnson

    Jimmy Johnson Fapstronaut

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    I have read a book called "Make love great again" by Deanna Lorraine. It gave me some insight on the matter. I personally have been interested in getting a girlfriend. But that won't happen if I don't talk to any women. The book claims a man should project confidence.There is also a lot more in the book.
     
  18. greenishmoon

    greenishmoon Fapstronaut

    Good. At least you solved that.
     
  19. didodido

    didodido Fapstronaut

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    Forgive yourself for not being perfect.
     
    RobbyGo36 likes this.
  20. lolos

    lolos Fapstronaut

    Read the book of pook. Also don't shit where you eat.
     

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