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How I Discovered Porn and Masturbation and it's Effects on me

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by LifeTransformation2017, Apr 22, 2014.

  1. I've been a NoFap member since December of last year, but I never told the story of how I discovered porn. So I was on twitter and at the time I was following this guy. I'm not gonna say his name, but we shared some of the same interests and he seemed like a cool guy. So anyway one day he retweeted this picture of a naked girl and I was amazed by it. I believe I was 13 at the time and I had never seen what girls look like without clothes on. So after I saw this picture I wanted to see who originally tweeted the picture and it was tweeted by this porn account. I still remember the name of it, but I won't say the name because it might cause some of you to relapse. Anyway I went to this porn account and viewed some of the other girls and it was like a whole new world to me. I loved it. However I did not masturbate to these pictures. I discovered masturbation later on, but when I saw that picture it gave me an amazing feeling that I've never felt before. Then when I discovered masturbation it was like heaven. It was like the best feeling in the world. At this time in my life I wasn't addicted to porn or masturbation. I only masturbated once in a while when I felt really horny. I never thought it would become an addiction. I continued to occasionally masturbate. Most of the time I didn't masturbate to porn. I would picture the girls at my school slowly taking off their clothes until they were completely naked. Then I'd masturbate. This continued for a couple of months. I consider last summer the time when I seriously became addicted to masturbating. I'd masturbate in the bathroom or when I was home alone. Sometimes I would even go out to the woods near my house, get completely naked and masturbate there. Then I started watching porn more often and became addicted to that. I tried to quit many times, but I couldn't. Then I started high school and because of all my stress from school I started PMOing even more. This lead to me becoming socially awkward. People have even said that my personality has changed and I don't feel like I'm the same person I was before I became addicted to porn and masturbation. Porn and masturbation has also effected my academic performance at school. I used to get good grades all the time and now I'm getting Cs and Ds. Porn has changed my life dramatically and I want it to be the way it was before I discovered porn and masturbation.
     
  2. Thanks for sharing your story. It is a typical example of how our curiosity is kindled and how we are gradually drawn into a pleasurable habit which finally becomes a life-changing addiction. One aspect of this is how you went from masturbating in a locked room (bathroom) to getting naked in the local woods and masturbating there. Take heart from the direction of travel, which is now toward self-control, greater confidence and normality. Keep going dude.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Apr 22, 2014

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