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Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Kman20, Mar 28, 2019.
Anyone who started off with one or even no friends and now have their own group ? How’d ya do it ?
Most of the times when I meet someone new is based in my will and practising the language I study, one of the best ways is speaking it, so I enjoy when I'm waiting for the class or in class when there's nothing happening to talk with somebody, they cooperate, after all, they wanna learn and practise as well.
Also, at university or work, I use to talk a lot and try to get them as colleagues, to have someone to talk or for a network, people who can share opportunities of job or something like that, like talking about things at the local you work/study, asking what function the person do there, if I know a little bit of the area or a term in the area of knowledge of him we talk about, where do they wanna do/study in the future...then both get used to talk sometimes and it turns to something normal, and then a friendship can grow.
Also I talk a little bit of what I like when I meet, like videogames, or something I know it could be a nice point to start a conversation. I always ask to people for example what they did in vacation, which was a few weeks before here, if they did something cool you kinda ask things correlates, one thing I saw years ago and helps me is "Let the people talk", specially about something good, what they like or did which was good. If they are searching for opportunities and you know something, share to them, they will be thankfull. Small and occasional talks leads to a feeling of "I know this guy, not a strange anymore", then it goes naturally.
THAT'S WHAT I DO, at the end, I have people to talk and be with in the three places I am most of the time, university, job and parallels courses. There's a plenty ways to get a group, I'm sure you'll find your best way.
You have more work to do
Search me o, Lord, seeif there is anything offensive to you in me.
Jesus will get you ready for friends and provide them when youre ready
Long time I thought I had friends. Until I stopped inviting them. I discovered that I was the one who keep the contacts.
My wise grandmother told me once: "Let God show you who your friends are".
Nowadays I lost the illusion to have many friends, but feeling much better being my own friend, with God at my side.
My church gives me opportunities to connect to others. And in my daily work, my clients gives me these social contacts.
I've no group, but I'm content with the contacts I have.
Talk to people. Don’t care if some will reject you. You will find friends. Go to coffee shops.
For me it was finally getting my first girlfriend and then occasionally going out with her friends who in a way are technically my friends now. But I personally find having a “group” of friends overrated, most people who have friends will tell you that they really only have 1-2 people they actually consider friends. I’m also a shy/reserved person by nature and I’ve never even wanted a group of friends. I’m content with just going out my my girlfriend and that’s it.
Perhaps it’s my age, I’m going to be 27 soon and my priorities now are more about making money and getting ahead in life than wanting a group of friends..for me that is so highscool in the sense that I believe adults for the most part don’t have large groups of friends, and that it’s typically something asssocisted with younger adults. But I understand others are different in their desires and I respect that.
I said something sarcastic, they laughed and the rest is history.
I think a girlfriend would be a lot harder than growing a social circle. I barely have one or two friends irl either.
Lol go DEEPER
I try to be funny too. Making people laugh is a good way to make friends.
I've managed to find friends via online dating. That's not the intention, but sometimes you find you're not the right fit for a relationship, but you'd like to stay in touch anyway. And it also provides the possibility of them introducing you to other people.
I think online dating would be fun but I think it’d also be detrimental to a Fapstronaut and on what my goals are. How was the experience for you ?
It's been dire lately. But I've met some decent people in the past. It can be problematic from a NoFap perspective though as some of the profile pics can be a little provocative, which is OK in isolation but the cumulative effect can potentially be triggering.
Yeah, I trust myself to not be triggered but I still find it detrimental. I do think it’d be fun to meet up with attractive girls and talk to them. Could grow my social skills and dating exp (which I currently have zero of) but do not want to jump into bad waters. Seems that the general consensus among nofappers is that dating apps are bad.