How do women feel about PE (Premature Ejaculation)?

I think it mostly depends on how you handle it, pretty much like everything. I am pretty sure most women won't like it if you break down and cry because of it, but if you handle it smoothly, heck even make fun of the situation a little bit, they will get over it. If it keeps happening then professional help may be needed.

 

Exactly what danhk said!

If afterwards you cry like a little bitch, women aren’t gonna like that. If however you can make light of the situation and add humour to it, I’m sure she wouldn’t mind, women love men that can make fun of themselves. It takes the pressure off of them a little. If it does happen then make sure you make up for it in other ways, use your hands, mouth, etc...

If it keeps on happening then there are other steps that can be taken. Like a Kegel/reverse Kegel routine. Numbing creams, thicker condoms... and so on.

 

I think the first question is when you say PE, how long are you talking? Often guys say they have PE, but then say they have lasted around 5-7 minutes, which is the average time from penetration that a man O’s, so if that’s you that’s not PE. Porn teaches guys that women want sex for hours and love it, it’s a warped view. Of course every woman is different and some do like long sessions, but the average woman is starting to count the ceiling tiles, and get bored after about 15 minutes, certainly after 30 and at an hour she’s starting to think you are not attracted to her. Not to mention, it starts to hurt. Plus in a long term relationshp I have things to do. When you have work, and kids you don’t have time for all that. I expect that all men are going to have PE the first time you have sex with them. And as a 40 yea old woman I can tell with limited exceptions that is true. And as someone who dated a man with DE, who took an hour to O and had to use his own hand, I would pick PE anyday over that. It was miserable and made me feel unattractive.

 

Hey TenPerent - Do NOT worry about PE! Make your girl feel safe and loved, then bring her to org&8zm however she likes best. After that, she's all yours to do what you want as quick as you want. Then hold her close and make her breakfast in the morning. First you must fix the DE thing! When the guy fails to org&8zm PIV, he will end up feeling unfulfilled and discouraged. The girl can end up feeling diminished as well. Believe me. The girl wants to be the reason you org&8zm!

 

As a female I only had one guy ever who had an O before his clothes came off and he was a virgin so I understood and it did not keep happening. I also dated a guy that had PE for the entire 6 months we dated, it never improved. But the issue with him was he refused to discuss it. For me I think if he were open to at least working on the issue I would be okay with that, but his refusal to even discuss it was a huge red flag not just for sex but communication overall. Being that my most recent ex had DE induced by porn I will tell you that I really tried to be okay with him never being able to reach O from PIV sex, but I just could not get past it. That was something I wanted to experience with the person I would spend my life with. I am just one woman though plenty of others could be okay with what you are describing if it was truly an issue outside of your control or if you refused to do what you needed to to stop it, meaning if your PE or DE or ED are caused by your PMO or MO and you won’t stop I think you will find less understanding then say if you were in a an accident and could not fix it. I don’t think anyone would ideally choose to be in a relationship with someone with a sexual dysfunction but many people can deal with it or get past it if you are open and upfront and I think that’s the key communication early on in the relationship about these things. I think it’s better that you bring it up before you have sex. In my personal opinion if I had to state the order of male sexual dysfunction I would most prefer PE then DE then ED.

 

You are not alone in the sense that you thought lasting longer was desirable by women I would say the majority of men think that and that’s from porn. It’s funny guys brag to each other about their stamina while their female partners are telling their friends that they don’t think their partner finds them attractive because they can’t make them o. We wonder if it’s because we are doing something wrong or is it the five pounds we just gained or are you thinking about that 20 year old that we saw earlier today. And people generally derive pleasure from pleasuring their partner so just like you enjoy pleasuring her she wants to pleasure you and when she can’t she feels incompetent. It’s like a man who can’t make his female partner O no matter what he does but worse because women are known for struggling with O whereas men are supposed to be ready to go at all times. The shame that a woman feels here is vast. And women are blamed too. Maybe you need to dress up more, be more submissive fix your hair. And using my hand or mouth is fun once in awhile but when you can only O that way it’s no longer fun. But the good news is now to do know and you’ve got time to change it.

I suspect you suffer from death grip as well as pmo addiction. Remember a vagina is never going to give you the friction and grip of your hand. One think I asked my ex was to grip my arm as hard as he would when moing and it was painful. I then gripped his as hard as I pass possibly could and he could not feel it. So recognize that a woman’s touch is much gentler than yours. Plus as I watched him moing because that was the only way he could O early on I saw how rapidly he moved his hand and knew there was no way that sex even with a spry 18 year old could replicate that. So consider this as well.

The point is you are one step ahead of most guys in that you know this is an issue and you want to change it. In my case the motivation to change was just not there for my ex. He was also 46 and preferred to be able to continue to PMO and not O in bed, than to having a fulfilling sex life.

 

Hey TenPercent - How could you not feel this way when all a guy hears is women blaming men for their inability to give women a proper org$$m. Just take a look at what women write about men. Besides PE is about the only known medical condition that is diagnosed by what someone else can't do. Sick!

 

Hi GG - I'm personally going on 900 days of NoFap. Needless to say, I'm about as anti- porn as they get. But I believe the primary cause guys think they don't last isn't porn. Rather it's because that's all they hear and that's all they read. Females and journalists have squarely placed the blame on men for the failure of women to orga$$m. In my way of thinking, guys like TenPercent need to reclaim their ability to be sexually heathy and women need to person up as well. Stop blaming men for the failure of women to own her own thing.

 

Where do you read that women squarely place the blame on men for their failure to orgasm? I’m not saying that some women don’t do that but it’s certainly not “all you read.” The single biggest reason a man cannot make a woman O (presuming it’s his fault as it often has nothing to do with him) is not PE, or any failure of anything the man is failing to do in the bedroom, nope it has to do with his failure to listen. The only men who could not make me O refused to listen when I told them what I needed. Instead they continued to do what they did to their exes, what felt good to them or what they saw in porn. If a man is willing to listen to a woman then he can almost always make her O. It’s men who place the emphasis on their penises not us, we don’t need them to O. What does “person up” mean what are you asking women to do?

 

Hey GG – As you can tell given my nearly 900 days with no PMO, I am a big proponent of NoFap. Seriously. You asked - where do I read that women squarely place the blame on men for their failure to orga$$m??? For starters, your very reply proves my point by blaming men. So, men just don’t listen well according to you, and this explains it. What a simplification.

But the topic was TenPercent’s rationalization that his DE was at least partially tolerable because ‘lasting longer’ was so massively desirable by women. After searching a couple of the top internet medical sites and even some of the more popular women mags, the drum beat is that PE is one of most (if not the top) male sexual dysfunction. DE is often completely ignored!

How many men belittle NoFap.Com and fail to research PMO, because they rationalize a man with DE is ALWAYS better than a man with that wretched PE. Men deserve some understanding, too, and they don’t need all the criticism in the form of psuedo-science-articles and magazines authored by pop culture journalists masquerading as experts. You can agree or not. I don't really care which.

 

Oh your post said 500 days with no PMO, but 900 or 500 are both still amazing so congrats, but for all your success you seem very angry and bitter towards women. I never said “men just don’t listen.” I said that the circumstances that I have experienced where men could not bring me to O as well as those of most of my female friends is where the man did not listen to what the woman wants, meaning in bed. My belief is that communication as at @+TenPercent says is the key and that if communication is present in a sexual relationship, that most things can be overcome in bed. Did you see the part where I said “presuming it’s his fault as it often has nothing to do with him?” How is that blaming all men? Other women may have other explanations for why a man cannot make them O, I do not know. I am just telling you the experiences that I personally had, and they were rare, most guys DID listen to what I wanted and needed as I listened when they told me they same. I agree with you that PE is the number one condition and DE is often ignored. If you do further research you will learn then when it comes to men seeking treatment for DE it is almost always precipitated by their female partner. Men rarely seek help for it on their own, becuase they don’t think it’s an issue. It is also very understudied in the research as opposed to PE. It could be that its less common, or just that men don’t come forward with it unless a partner forces them to. Personally I would take PE anyday over DE. I think a lot of men rationalize DE is not an issue, but I don’t think they get it from reading cosmopolitan magazine, I mean after all how many men read that? I don’t read that crap or if I do it is for pure entertainment. But PE based on actual legitimate research studies is a lot more common. And I furthermore don’t think that women base their sexual pleasure on what cosmo says. If more men have PE then more women discuss PE. I actually think DE will be more researched going forward due to the increase of PMO addiction.

 

Hi TenPercent - Speaking for me, my path to recovery was not littered with concerns about diagnostic codes. Not everyone needs a clinical diagnosis or DSM manual to know if PE is a concern. Most just know it’s something that’s negatively affecting a relationship with someone important. I focused solely on stopping all PMO and building a relationship with a woman who I loved and loved me enough to patiently help me in my struggle against DE. The last thing we worried about was PE. It was a tactic that worked wonderfully!

 

Not so. In my view, your post plainly linked a woman's failure to orga$$m with the man's failure to listen. It was very clear. See above. But that's not my point. I just think all this discussion about PE does not serve men very much. It just helps them rationalize why DE is an acceptable condition and reason to discount NoFap. Let's get off the drumbeat of PE as exemplified by all the popular literature, blogs, forums and magazines. I don't follow this NoFap.Com site to hear sad stories about PE. It's better to focus rightfully on the dangers of PMO and give hope to all the many, many young (and old) men with ED and DE. BTW the NoFap calculator below says 500+ not 500. I presume it's because it maxes out when a person like me reaches 500 days. As of the time of this post, my actual count is 991 days. I have an app on my phone. I just checked.

 

No it does not. You are picking and choosing parts of my post rather than reading it as a whole or reading app of my comments together. Are you bitter and angry towards women or am I misreading that? Because there is some clear anger in your post.

Many men develop PE as a result of pmo addiction so I think it’s totally relevant to discuss it on NoFap. You can of course choose to not read those stories if you don’t find them helpful and I do agree that the literature needs to address DE more.