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How do I deal with visual triggers?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by RedSoxNaut, Jun 11, 2017.

  1. RedSoxNaut

    RedSoxNaut New Fapstronaut

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    I have had this question for a while now. When I walk through, say, a mall, the whole place is usually littered with pictures a scarcely dressed women (at least here in Hungary) and being a recovering addict when I see them I obviously have an urge to look at them. Although I'm usually succesful in turning away, it quickly becomes really tiresome and physically turning away means your mind is still constantly occupied with porn. All of this just gradually builds up and sometimes ends up leading to a relapse. What do I do to deal with visual triggers with less effort?
     
    EvolvingPrimate likes this.
  2. you only get to look one time, for 2 seconds. Or something like that. Soon as you notice you are looking, just look away.
     
  3. Metal Bat

    Metal Bat Fapstronaut

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    Avoid triggers like the plague.

    That's all you can do.

    I understand you perfectly. It's as if every trigger undermines your willpower. I feel the same. But we must handle it. If it was easy, we wouldn't be here.
     
  4. favre4ever

    favre4ever Fapstronaut

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    This is the sexualized world we live in unfortunately... Not much you can do but to be proactive about it. I think once you develop the habit of not looking you won't even think twice about it eventually.
     
    White Sheep likes this.
  5. LKT

    LKT Fapstronaut

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    I agree one you get into that horny state I think it ruins it

    Like this guy said, once you notice that you're looking, look away.

    Over time you'll be like

    *sees scantily clad model in lingering/beer/whatever ad
    *meh and looks away

    eventually this will become easier
     
  6. awakening now

    awakening now Fapstronaut

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    Never mind billboards, it is seeing actual women walking down the street / on public transport that I find the most triggering! Especially now that the weather is getting better.
     
    EvolvingPrimate likes this.
  7. Rhys0

    Rhys0 Fapstronaut

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    I find this the exact same. Yeah sure there are your other triggers where there will be pictures of girls in stores, but the one that affects me the most, I will have to agree with you and say that actual women are a trigge themselves. Even today for me I was at a shopping centre and multiple times I would see an attractive girl, so I would look away. But then I would find myself later looking back to where she was standing and I feel horrible for doing this.

    I know that all I have to do is just look away and focus on something else, but every time my mind is telling me "look behind you" nagging me to do so.
    But I know that we can all do this. We just have to push ourselves and look away, and every time we do so, it will become easier and we will become stronger.
    Keep pushing and you will succeed.
     
    EvolvingPrimate likes this.
  8. KrmGrn

    KrmGrn Fapstronaut

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    The problem for me isn't seeing an attractive woman, it's when I start intently looking and fantasizing that there's a problem.
     
  9. awakening now

    awakening now Fapstronaut

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    Like just now I was headed into the train station when I saw there were two girls in cut-off denim shorts like 50 metres ahead of me. So I power-walk the distance so that I'm just behind them. Then I notice one of them has a bit of a fat ass, and anyway they're with two guys I imagine are their boyfriends. So now I feel bad in all kinds of stupid ways.

    That's the kind of conditioned behaviour that doesn't serve me & that I need to quit doing.
     
  10. EvolvingPrimate

    EvolvingPrimate Fapstronaut

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    exactly my problem too. I end up on P & M usually because it's the real women that I may or even may not interact with me that send me on that path of demise. I see them, I "undress" them, which isn't hard sometimes as they're wearing "painted" on pants, I can't stop thinking about it and BAM! Another fail rolls by...
     
    awakening now likes this.
  11. Third_Eye

    Third_Eye Guest

    Just distract your mind from the urges and triggers. If the environment that you're in gives you triggers and urges, get away from it.
     
  12. Fiftyish

    Fiftyish Fapstronaut

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    After you are triggered, try your best not to go straight home or any place where you might have the opportunity to M... Hopefully, trigger will pass in a few hours...
     
    Third_Eye likes this.
  13. suddenly jealous

    suddenly jealous New Fapstronaut

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    Actively thinking of the eventual pain looking at triggering stuff would cause me helps most of the times.
     
  14. Barnabas_

    Barnabas_ Fapstronaut

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    I have once heard this: you are not responsible for the first look, but for the second yes.

    What helps me additionally is a reminder to be faithful to my wife, including beaing faithful to her in my heart.
     
  15. ZenAF

    ZenAF Fapstronaut

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    So what I'm about to write comes out of genuine curiosity.
    What kind of people do you want to be? Because it seems like you all want to be monks. I have the impression that you have been fighting your porn addiction for so long that now any lustful thought is deemed as bad and needs to be avoided.
    To me there's something pathological to it, like you tilted completely into the other extreme. But then again I don't know what kind of life you want to lead.

    Men are supposed to be triggered by hot women on the street, they're hot women. Not porn! Does that cause sexual thoughts? Yes. But as long as you don't go to the nearest toilet and start jerking off, or as long as you don't spend freaking 10 minutes thinking about a trigger, where's the problem exactly? Why can't you separate experiencing eroticism in the world from having a porn addiction?

    Personally I think a man needs to be strong (mentally even more than physically) so he can bare his own suffering and help bare and alleviate the suffering of others, so he makes life better for everyone. If you can't even walk through a mall without being scared of pictures hanging on the wall or women in denim's walking by, how are you strong?

    Again, I don't understand this way of living you're practicing that's why I'm a bit judgemental. So maybe you can shed some light on your behavior and how it's gonna lead you to having a better life than you had.
     
    4DCreator likes this.
  16. safa61947

    safa61947 Fapstronaut

    This guy revived a post from almost 2 years ago. Don't expect any answers.
     
  17. mghyper17

    mghyper17 Fapstronaut

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    u have to take this from your mind as soon as u can. i dont think see it accidently for 1 sec will change something. good luck m8
     

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