Hermits, solitaries, aspiring monastics

Hey all,

Does anybody else feel the intense desire to live a largely solitary life, or is anybody already doing so? I have for many years and am currently learning to break the conditioning I've been exposed to re: the idea of isolation. Isolation is something that other people experience but for me, I feel more alone and isolated the more I am around people.

Above all other life paths I respect that of the hermit, the mendicant, the monastic. It's one thing to 'see through the veil of appearances' and another entirely to be so resolute in that belief that one chooses to pursue that as their primary goal in life.

I have decided to begin, in earnest, the path towards finding my hermitage and living in the way that I feel I am meant to. Of course I'll have to work but for the most part, I want to sit in silence and devotion to what I see as Truth, the natural world; symbiosis rather than attempting to control my environment.

The internet's a good thing for those such as myself (so long as the use thereof is restrained-) over the last few years I've found a few communities and sites populated by people who feel just as I do- given that we're in the vast minority of people, knowing that one is not alone (just as in this community,) in desiring contemplative silence above all else. It turns out that most hermits still entertain guests, engage in the world etc- they simply choose to live alone and dedicate their private time to devotion rather than worldly pursuits.

I wonder how many others like that populate this forum? I'd like to keep in contact and discuss things which are incredibly difficult to research-- things such as how to find a suitable home, maintain a living etc.

 

Oh, the irony

 

Thanks for the replies all, it's cool to see such varying perspectives. @Awedouble - I think you've hit on a core issue there; even when connected in social groups etc I'm increasingly finding that people are defaulting to their devices more than they are interacting with each other. Even a social gathering has become fodder for online posting for a lot of people. There's definitely some pain in solitude, but for me I find it helps me when I do go into the world. I won't deny that mental health plays a big part of my withdrawal from the world, and I'm spending an awful lot of time on here where I could be strengthening my resolve to feel boredom etc.
Reminds me of a Bright Eyes lyric- 'I'm completely alone at a table of friends/I feel nothing for them/I feel nothing; nothing'

@drac16 - I respect the evangelical view, I feel that the evangelical churches achieve a lot of the aims of monasticism in having such a vibrant and close-knit community- simplicity, Godliness, helping the poor, being in close contact with the trinity through worship and morality. Through practices such as tithing, volunteering and community services (soup kitchens, opportunity shops etc,) the practice of poverty (which isn't what it means in modern parlance,) obedience and submission to the Lords' will are achieved. In that way I feel that evangelical practice often approaches that of the monasteries but in full view of, and integration with, the world. Thanks for replying!

@My Best self - I've ascertained that I'm really not fussed about having a family myself; the only thing that's stopping me from becoming a novice is respect for my parents really- I feel that it would be very hurtful to them for me to do that at this point, so I'm going about finding ways to live to my ideals but also to respect the amount of time, love and resources they put into bringing me up.

I feel that there's a good middle way out there and at the end of the day my fathers' wishes are quite simple- he doesn't care if I live in the bush in a shack somewhere so long as I have income and don't end up completely destitute in chasing my dreams.
I think that's completely reasonable really; he's put a lot of thought and love into letting go of his own ideas of what I should be, so I feel it's a good thing to give him the pleasure of having at least one of his children become a well-integrated member of society. Unforunately my other sibling has chosen the complete opposite.

Have you heard of the concept of being an oblate? It allows one to take up a Rule of life in cooperation with a spiritual advisor, but doesn't forgo the possibility of having a family etc. It allows one to live in the world but make an official pledge to service of the Lord in daily life. I'm currently working at developing my own Rule, something I can live to long-term with authenticity and without forsaking my position in society. As much as I want to become a monastic it feels like that's my own will and not currently that of God. I would only make a mockery of monastic life at this point anyhow- I have a lot more work to do in regards to living simply and in line with my interpretation of scripture (Hindu and Christian,) before I could make such a life move.