Here's Why NoFap is Essential for Spiritual Growth

That's an interesting angle... I never thought of that, but now that you're raising it it seems spot on.

I used to hang out at a spot where they'd bring in belly dancers, and though that was more for entertainment than what original belly dancing must have been intended for, there is something in those contortions of the dancer's body that is almost... Transcendent...

Nice one!

 

I clarified in the post "in general terms". In the first part of my post I said "partner" meaning both man or woman. As I have only had sex with men I can only offer my perspective IN GENERAL TERMS. statistics also show women orgasm infrequently during sex and it is easier for men to orgasm.

I swear people are looking for reasons to get offended. The amount of ego in this thread is crazy!! Anyway with that in mind I no longer feel as though I can fully express myself so I will bow out of this discussion. My very best to everyone on their journeys

 

My reply to you was not me having a go at you, sister. Try not to see it that way

I was making a point, and I was not offended at all, was just in disagreement. I know you've only been with men. I'm aware of that. It's just how the comment came across. You said it's difficult to get men to connect, and you said women want connectedness (it makes it sound like men don't). I'm not talking about the orgasm part. I just disagree altogether that more women want an emotional connection more than men. I completely disagree with that. It's nothing to do with ego. I'm talking from experience, and from other men I have spoken with.

I can't talk for all men, but some men become detached solely because of how badly they've been treated by some women in the first place. I just do not agree with the general consensus that men are less emotional, or are less sensitive than women. Different men and women around the world portray different characteristics altogether even just due to the culture alone. It's about how the man has grown up through childhood and what he's been taught, and sometimes it's also to do with how close he was with his mother. A lot of men who grow up an only child (like myself as well), generally tend to be more sensitive towards women, or men who grew up in single parent households.

My gripe is not with you. My gripe is with the general consensus that women are more sensitive or more emotional.

Don't take it personally. I love and appreciate everyone here. If I disagree with you, its not a personal attack to you. It's just conversation, and would like to think I can still get along with you, or anyone I happen to disagree with on the forums
We're all just throwing our points across, that's all.

 

I was asked to comment on the David Deida passage which I did. How can you disagree with opinion and perspective? After all it is my own and no one else's. Next time try saying something like "my perspective is this" and then telling us about it. I love hearing others perspectives. You flat out told me to stop generalizing which I felt was inappropriate because obviously I am generalizing as I am providing an opinion not facts. I cannot express myself without being general. I don't have all the facts and don't have all the answers, all I have is my own perspective....it is all anyone has.

The thing is I assume not all women are emotional and not all men are emotionless. Just like I assume not all dogs like walks and all cats like milk. I cannot offer facts unless I am omniscient which I am not!

 

There's no need to be angry. Relax.

I'm really confused. You just admitted to generalising, which is what I found to be the problem in the first place.
It would have been more correct to say "It's difficult for 'some' men to connect". I have absolutely no problem with anyone sharing an opinion, but generalising is not the same as sharing an opinion. Generalising is unfairly lumping a certain group all into one category. Most people on this site are guys, so obviously if you generalise something about men, most likely, one of us will say something, especially if the generalisation is inaccurate.

I disagreed with the generalisation you made. It would make more sense to say that 'some men' are addicted to orgasms, and that it's easy to make 'some' men orgasm.

It may sound like I'm nitpicking here, which really, I'm not. I just feel that those simple changes would allow your statements to sound more like a perspective and an opinion. To say that men "in general" this and that, is unfair, as are most generalisations. I politely asked you not to generalise, not to attack you, but just for the simple fact that generalising is unfair, as it lumps me and other guys into a particular category which I just do not feel I am apart of.

I'm not trying to argue here, I just think that we can sometimes word things a little better.

 

The points I made must have gone over your head. No one is trying to be politically correct. Of course everyone is allowed freedom of speech. That's not the problem. I just think that we should be careful in making generalisations. How is that hard to understand?

I'm also bowing out of this discussion, as it's just getting stupid.

Have a nice day.

 

@Limeaid and @AlltheRageBackHome...

Your bowing out is much understood. We wish you both well and trust that you'll ultimately become the person you're striving to be.

Before you go though, just a parting shot from me...

You know, this statement has been ringing in my head. At first I felt bad, because at some level I knew I contributed to this, but ultimately I decided to really reflect on the context. I realised that you are quite right Limeaid, while I cannot speak for any other member of NoFap, I can definitely speak for myself. I am full of ego and it was very egotistical of me to think that a "peaceful thread" could ever be developed. I mean, this is an open forum where people can come and air their views anonymously after all. "How on earth did you ever think a thread about radical spirituality could not get out of hand Alpinist!?" said the voice in my head. I pondered about my own conduct on this thread, which was at first very protective of this notion of "all -peace/no-disagreement approach" and I realised that it was folly and fanaticism because it's just impossible like what @RyanRVA pointed out; we're all human beings on a journey of self-healing, recovery and rediscovering self-love - there was bound to be differences and various attachments.

With this in mind I decided to go deeper... "So which of my egos was I starting to get comfortable with?". What caused such self-deception? Which ego in me first filled me with enough pride to think people can become absolutely understanding of each's differences overnight, what was it in me that felt bad that our members were clashing instead of unifying on a so-called 'spiritual thread'. In the Treatise of a Revolutionary Psychology Master Samael Aun Weor speaks about acquiring a permanent centre of gravity. He asserts that instead of one, the average human being has several egos, each with its own idiosyncrasies and agenda. From my personal experience I believe he's right and so I just wanted to thank you for making me remember why this thread was started in the first place. Thank you for being honest about your views good and bad and reminding me of the great work that I still have to do, the ultimate aim of all of this - Self-Realisation.

To @Limeaid, I must remind you that you're an amazing wife and your husband is one fortunate Fapstronaut to have you by his side. You're even willing to create a profile for yourself and enter the Fapstronauts world just to support him - wow!!! Keep it up. To @AlltheRageBackHome, let's stay in touch buddy - all the best with finding your soul mate!

Thank you both for making me realise that this is really a journey with challenges along the way, with people of differing views along the way, with potential clashes and negative emotions along the way and thank you for making me realise that such cannot be avoided. Thank you for reminding me to not forget to work on my own egos and that all of this is ultimately about inward freedom. And that Freedom must start with me and no one else.

Peace be with you... Fare well!

On Ego's Master Samael Aun Weor says:

"The sad part of all this is that we do not possess true individuality. If we had a permanent center of gravity we would then truly work... There are so many excuses in these matters, so many evasions, so many fascinating attractions, that it usually becomes almost impossible to comprehend the urgency of the esoteric work. Many people live inside of us; we are never identical. Sometimes, a selfish person manifests through us, other times an irritable person, in any other instant, a generous, benevolent person, later on a scandalous one, a slanderous person, afterwards a saint, then, a liar, etc. Thus, inside of each one of us we have people of all types, “I’s” of all species. Our personality is nothing more than a marionette, a talking doll, something mechanical. Let us start by acting consciously during a small portion of our day. We need to stop being simple machines, even if it is for at least a few brief daily minutes. This will have a decisive influence on our existence. When we observe ourselves and do not do what this or that “I” wants us to do, then it is clear that we begin to stop being machines. A single moment in which one is sufficiently conscious as to stop being a machine, if it is done with will, tends to radically modify many disagreeable circumstances. Unfortunately, we live daily a mechanical, routine and absurd life. We repeat occurrences; our habits are the same; we never want to modify them. They are the mechanical tracks on which circulates the train of our miserable existence...

We need to observe the “I” which we have captured at a given moment; it is urgent to see it in each of these three centers of our organism. If we are alert and vigilant, like a watchman in time of war, while relating with other people, we can then discover ourselves. Do you recall at what time your vanity was hurt by someone? Your pride? What was it that upset you the most during the day? Why did you have that vexation? What was its secret cause? Study this, observe your head, heart and sexual center... Practical life is a marvelous school. So, through interaction with others we can discover those “I’s” that we carry within our interior. Any annoyance, any incident can lead us through inner Self-observation to the discovery of any “I,” whether it be of self-esteem, envy, jealousy, anger, covetousness, suspicion, calumny, lust, etc. We need to know ourselves before being capable of knowing others. It is urgent to learn to see others’ point of view. If we place ourselves in the place of others, we discover that the psychological defects that we attribute to others exist in abundance within our interior. To love our neighbor is indispensable; however, in the esoteric work, if one does not firstly learn how to place his own self in the position of another person, one cannot love others".

Source: Treatise of a Revolutionary Psychology

 

@RyanRVA : I'm glad you enjoyed The Perfect Matrimony. I was reading The Revolution of a Dialectic and The Treatise of a Revolutionary Psychology and I noticed how direct and unapologetic he can be. What I enjoy is that its underpinned by conviction and he substantiates everything he says with not only knowledge, but also personal experience.

"Do your work, then step back.
The only path to serenity".
-Verse 9 Tao Te Ching

Lao Tzu's words are so inspiring! I think he really captures the great dichotomy that so few truly comprehend. Artless Art as they call it in Zen, Non-attachment in the Vedic traditions and being "Wise as Serpent yet as innocent as a dove" as Yeshua the Christ put it. Very few reach that state - where one comprehends being and non-being simultaneously. The particular quote I've noted above reminds me of Karma Yoga, an area of my spirituality that I'm really focusing on now - its so easy to get swallowed by "the demands of the day" though.

Thanks for the feedback Ryan. Its one thing to read Master Samael or Swami Sivananda's work, but its another to hear it from someone who is alive today and living it and sharing their experiences as they go along. Today I met someone I once was intimate with, I was overcame by a rush of sexual desire that frankly scared me. I could just feel the energy, if i had said - lets to go to my place right now and ravish each other, she would have smiled and started talking dirty right there and then.... Fortunately I didn't but the way the encounter disturbed my emotional balance - wooh, its kind of scary. After 255 days clean, rebooting my system and brain and having a balanced sexual desire which I have managed to transmute and keep in my control day in day out and then to be suddenly so overwhelmed by my horniness caught me off guard. It made me realise how far I still have to go bro, I mean I can't imagine what it takes to penetrate someone you love and not do anything, it must be really weird for both of you in the beginning and must take serious will power - the orgasm can be really tempting. Thanks once more that feedback, it just shows us the possibilities brother - keep it up!

On the Dream...
What an awesome experience! The power of dreams... The ancients knew it Freud knew it, Jung knew it. There is something that happens in dreams and there are different levels of dreaming. Your dream just spell out victory!!! Somehow your subconscious is with and I think your wife's participation in this all is also adding to the impetus. "Where two or more agree - I am there with them" says the Almighty. Dream Yoga is one of the advanced from of spiritual practice - I think you're describing a taste of it. When is dreaming and becomes conscious that their dreaming and actually brings their will into the dream and fulfills that will, rather by beig blown about by the subconscious, that is a very important yet preliminary state on the path to true dream yoga. The more you can awaken your consciousness in dreams the more you awaken your consciousness overall. Only the body and brain needs to rest during sleep, but your soul, that life force which animates you never sleeps. What you've just demonstrated here is the power of focusing ones will and consciousness during the day and during sleep! You're truly spiritually gifted my man, things that others work for years for are happening to you quite quickly - more fire to that! Just a question here, when you and your wife are transmuting, do you chant a mantra or pray or something or do you just lay there in silence? Is there any interaction, do you visualise anything etc? i think that will be helpful to many of us.

On WISE (LOL - WISE, you have a sense of humour my brother)

Please do update us, how to you feel now?

I've never heard of that happening. The only emission I've seen someone have have while awake was in the first release of American Pie when Nadia is about to do Jim and he releases before they even got started - LOL. It is quite unexpected but it seems like that movement stimulates one's thighs and groin areaquite a bit so it makes sense that something like that could happen. Hey, its only your first month and it was completely involuntary without any visual sexual stimulation as what would happen in a dream so its just part of the transition process.

Overall your progress is great Ryan, its refreshing to hear such good news and great experiences. Please keep us updated...

 

Check this 10 minute video on Sexual Transmutation out... Any thoughts?

https://www.emergingsciences.org/zeitgeist-and-the-myth-of-the-sun-god/

Or go to the YouTube video direct here:

https://www.emergingsciences.org/blog/

 

That really helps bro!

This exactly how Master Samael describes what authentic transmutation is like. The seminal energy is pulled up to the brain from the genitals and then it activates the crown chakra. Thereafter it is drawn towards the heart and activates the heart chakra - with a statement like that, I know you're truly on to something.

One other thing @RyanRVA , how did you get involved with Taoism? Through your wife or choice? The perspective you offer is fresh and it shows the pragmatic potential that lies within the Taoist teachings beyond the transcendent and divine poetry that lao Tzu offers.

 

Hmmm... I see Brother.

I'm with you on the intellectualising the Tao. all great Masters have said the same thing - it is not external to you, it is not complex and scientific, it needs no riches, requires not physical strength - all it requires is Selflessness. Annihilate yourself and then you will see that death (of the little personal me) is actually life, that weaknesses (humility, meekness and selflessness) is the greatest strength, that deep pain and sadness (that comes as a result of the death of ones selfish desires and thoughts) is indeed the greatest joy!

Anything but this for me is mere child's play and fascination with universal phenomenon.

"Let the would-be student of “higher things” look to himself and beware of self-delusion.
If he is given to uttering words that deceive, or to speaking evil of others – if he speaks in
insincerity, envy, or malice - then he has not yet begun to study higher things. He may be
studying metaphysics, or miracles, or psychic phenomena, or astral wonders – he may be
studying how to commune with invisible beings, to travel invisibly during sleep, or to
produce curious phenomena - he may even study spirituality theoretically and as a mere
book study, but if he is a deceiver and a backbiter, the higher life is hidden from him. For
the higher things are these – uprightness, sincerity, innocence, purity, kindness,
gentleness, faithfulness, humility, patience, pity, sympathy, self-sacrifice, joy, goodwill,
love – and he who would study them, know them, and make them his own, must practice
them, there is no other way".
- James Allen

Many ignore the basics, seeking to be great masters of energy and metaphysical phenomena while ignoring the striving for righteousness, selflessness, nad purity of thought and being so that the Tao, Non-attachment, The Kingdom of Heaven, The Atman that which is eternal and loving within can be realised.

This is the power of transmutation! It puts in your hands, the most coveted energy source which can enable human beings to approximate towards the divine... The fire of the Divine Mother Kundalini.

On what you were saying about having a clear and balanced mind above, and the quote from Lao Tzu tell me if what James Allen says below about Equal Mindedness is not exactly the same thing! Sure it might be in different language and prose, but the essence is the same! That's why any seeker who looks, really looks will find regardless of culture or geography or religion or tradition. Hence the Eternal One - Yeshua the anointed Christ said: "Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened to you". What is this it he is talking about? is it not the Tao, is it note divine state of Zen, is it not the Non-attached state of supremacy that Krishna speaks of to Arjuna, is it not the Kingdom of Heaven? He did ot say if you are my follower and you seek you'll find - he said anyone who seeks will find, to anyone who knocks the door will be opened. He also said "The kingdom of God is not coming with signs to be observed; nor will they say, 'Look, here it is!' or, 'There it is!' For behold, the kingdom of God is within you." This is the eternal song of the Saviours and Sages of mankind - what you seek, oh hungry and thirsty humanity is within you, all you have to do is to really look for it and in order to that you have to become selfless!

"Equal-mindedness
To be equally-minded is to be peacefully-minded, for a man cannot be said to have
arrived at peace who allows his mind to be disturbed and thrown off the balance by
occurrences.

The man of wisdom is dispassionate, and meets all things with the calmness of a mind in
repose and free from prejudice. He is not a partisan, having put away passion, and he is
always at peace with himself and the world, not taking sides nor defending himself, but
sympathising with all.

The partisan is so convinced that his own opinion and his own side is right, and all that
goes contrary to them is wrong, that he cannot think there is any good in the other
opinion and the other side. He lives in a continual fever of attack and defence, and has no
knowledge of the quiet peace of an equal mind.

The equal-minded man watches himself in order to check and overcome even the
appearance of passion and prejudice in his mind, and by so doing he develops sympathy
for others, and comes to understand their position and particular state of mind; and as he
comes to understand others, he perceives the folly of condemning them and opposing
himself to them. Thus there grows up in his heart a divine charity which cannot be
limited, but which is extended to all things that live and strive and suffer.

When a man is under the sway of passion and prejudice he is spiritually blind. Seeing
nothing but good in his own side, and nothing but evil in the other, he cannot see
anything as it really is, not even his own side; and not understanding himself, he cannot
understand the hearts of others, and thinks it is right that he should condemn them. Thus
there grows up in his heart a dark hatred for those who refuse to see with him and who
condemn him in return, he becomes separated from his fellow-men, and confines himself
to a narrow torture chamber of his own making.

Sweet and peaceful are the days of the equal-minded man, fruitful in good, and rich in
manifold blessings. Guided by wisdom, he avoids those pathways which lead down to
hatred and sorrow and pain, and takes those which lead up to love and peace and bliss.
The occurrences of life do not trouble him, nor does he grieve over those things which
are regarded by mankind as grievous, but which must befall all men in the ordinary
course of nature. He is neither elated by success nor cast down by failure. He sees the
events of his life arrayed in their proper proportions, and can find no room for selfish
wishes or vain regrets, for vain anticipations and childish disappointments.

And how is this equal-mindedness - this blessed state of mind and life - acquired? Only
by overcoming one’s self, only by purifying one’s own heart, for the purification of the
heart leads to unbiased comprehension, unbiased comprehension leads to equal
mindedness, and equal-mindedness leads to peace. The impure man is swept helplessly
away on the waves of passion; the pure man guides himself into the harbour of rest. The
fool says, “I have an opinion;” the wise man goes about his business."