Hello community! I look forward to sharing with U!

Hey Guys and Girls, I am a 36 YO man from Australia, Single dad with shared custody raising my 2 young children, 8 and 5 years of age.
I am here because I want to take the next step in addressing sexual addiction, pornography and the pleasure seeking distractions that hijack my time, and distort the way I perceive women. I have spent enough time with these habits to realise they are not supporting my life in a happy way. I have been addicted to all types of distractions from my teens into my adult life. At first it was video games, tv, masturbation came along, drinking, drugs, pornography, womanising, gambling, spending money etc.. the list is long!
I have also been working on myself for a number of years now through counselling, therapists, reading & learning about human behaviour, diet and nutrition, meditation and yoga. So you could say i am now at a stage where I flip flop back and forth from feeling good to feeling guilt and shame that I am not loveable and there is something wrong with me. For years i have lacked in self esteem and have looked to others for validation. That way of looking at the world gave me social anxiety. Depression & anxiety have been a way of life for me from my early teens.
A year ago it got to it's worst when from what i can tell I was suffering PTSD and constant panic attacks. I thought I was going mad and that my professional and personal life was over as I knew it. Suicide was a thought that kept circulating in my head, if things didn't get any better, life was not worth living, but the thought of leaving my children who need me was not option. I am here 12 months later completely turned around. My self esteem is growing everyday, I feel more in control, more connected to friends and family, my children especially. So, i am here to take the next step in changing my habits for the better of my own happiness and the ripple effect it will have on my children.
I am here to take this seriously. I don't want to enjoy seeing women objectified, i don't know why i do. I would like to believe that I love and respect women, my daughter, my mother, my sister, but how can I watch these videos and still have integrity in my voice?
I look forward to contributing to this community and thank you for the opportunity to be part of it!

 

Hey Ayjaydubya, I remember the threat of the Millennium Bug!! I haven't yet been down the great ocean road (crazy I know) but it's on the list! Thanks for the welcome!

 

Hey D.J., I appreciate the warm welcome!
I have been sober for a month now and I think that helps with the impulsiveness although I do struggle with ADHD and that doesn't help with that. I haven't been a big drinker for a number of years, so staying off alcohol is quite easy. I am very much into fitness and health so that is part of my plan. I have always justified the casual sex and pornography part of my life, but I now feel it just turns into a dopamine addiction that is doing more harm then good.
The real problem was with Tinder. It had become a addiction over the last 2 years. Because of my social anxiety and the break up with my wife, it has been a easy way to meet women without the pressure of rejection which would usually send me into anxiety. But that has become a swiping addiction as well. I have been off tinder for most of January, reloaded it back yesterday and now deleted it again this morning. That is when I came across this website after recognising the usefulness of joining a group to help me with this. I usually stick to a goal once I set it so I don't really have any strategies in place other then less phone time and more outdoor activities + will power. Hoping I can move forth like this.
Any other suggestions would be welcomed.

 

Cheers mate!