1. Welcome to NoFap! We have disabled new forum accounts from being registered for the time being. In the meantime, you can join our weekly accountability groups.
    Dismiss Notice

Got a Girlfriend, I think I am rebooted

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by FapFapFapNoMore, Mar 2, 2018.

  1. Hey bud just skimming the replies; I think an open relationship will do almost as much damage as porn. I don't see the point in forsaking porn to pick something like this up. Both devastate intimacy.
     
    Eleanor, SanityOverVanity and GG2002 like this.
  2. Good job dude, approaching girls is no easy feat. Just one question: what's the success rate of your approaches? Like how often do you find yourself having a "successful" approach?
     
  3. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    2,007
    3,391
    143
    That was exactly the point I was trying to make.
     
    Eleanor likes this.
  4. FapFapFapNoMore

    FapFapFapNoMore Fapstronaut

    126
    146
    43
    It takes time and dedication...at first I was a wreck. I couldn't open my mouth. I mumbled, stumbled, and nervous. But it really takes practice to get good at it. It also needs preparation and knowledge and mindfulness meditation to be able to pull it off. out of 5 approaches...sometimes I get 1 date, sometimes I get 3 dates in a week. in 10 approaches, I get about 4-6 dates. It really depends if I flirted, made rapport, and stirred up her emotions on my approaches. I don't intend to keep any of the women that i don't find interesting. Some dates were lame, like...she had no sense of humor or can't relate with her etcc(I blame this on myself, I need to do more research on relatable subjects)....I think beautiful women, are bored out of their mind because guys are too scared to approach them...one of my dates, was a straight up 10, she said most of the really good looking guys she dated, did not have a sense of humor at all. Women actually prefer men with confidence, wit, and sense of humor and has life going on for him...etc...
     
    HipPete likes this.
  5. FapFapFapNoMore

    FapFapFapNoMore Fapstronaut

    126
    146
    43
    I agree, but my life is good right now. I didn't watch porn for 71 days now...because I substituted it with working out, cold showers, going to college, working on my game (pickup), getting a job to buy a car and a house...having an open relationship...well life is good right now and I'm happy and that's all I care about. 4 years ago I was living in my parent's basement, wacking off to porn, socially inept, not progressing in life, nobody cared about me....all because of NoFap and Pickup, I got my life straight up and back on the road. Why would I would want something less right now? I am happy where I am and my gf is happy where she is. We support each other, she's open in having threesomes and she WANTS it. sooooo......how is that so bad?
     
  6. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    2,007
    3,391
    143
    Sometimes we need to get burned personally, and make mistakes in order to see “how it is so bad.” That time is not here right now for you, as you don’t want to open your mind to it, but the time will come, and hopefully not too many people will be hurt in your wake.
     
    Eleanor likes this.
  7. FapFapFapNoMore

    FapFapFapNoMore Fapstronaut

    126
    146
    43
    How did I hurt others? I never hurt anybody. I am pretty much open to what they want. I don't think I am treating them as sex objects, I don't go around looking at their butts while they walk on the street, I don't go around wolf whistling at them like those other losers.... In fact, it's the other way around, women GAWK at me and their the one that see me as a sex object. I approach, I flirt at them, and they automatically just come up to me (most). There's nothing wrong with being secure sexually. I am giving them the ultimate experience out of their bored lives. No, I have not watched porn for 71 days. I do get to know them...and I love each and everyone of them. I love the female energy.
     
  8. vibemaker

    vibemaker Fapstronaut

    817
    10,925
    123
    My Journal
    Wow, this labeling is so sad man.
     
    Eleanor and vxlccm like this.
  9. @FapFapFapNoMore dont sorry about all these SJWs on the thread, you have a good thing going according to the info. People on this fourm seem to believe that we need to return to fundamental Christian ways of sexuality, which is just ridiculous. Live your life the way that you want to!
     
    FapFapFapNoMore likes this.
  10. vxlccm

    vxlccm Fapstronaut

    5,292
    101,895
    143
    My Journal
    Valuing people as people. That's all some people are saying. My wife is no number to me. She's everything... infinite. So, 1000/100 doesn't even cover it. Well, yes, many of us are Christians but that doesn't equate to overly judgemental about someone else's moral choices. I believe in freedom to choose, and respect the rights of all in that.

    I expect everyone will learn as they do try relationships. What's really important is what's on the inside. True love is out there and worth far more than various lusts. Which, I do believe is fully compatible with NoFap in the sense of focusing back on real life and real people instead of pixels -- you know? In any case, good luck on NoFap because it will certainly lead you to the better life :)
     
    GG2002 and Eleanor like this.
  11. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    2,007
    3,391
    143
    I’m not Christian or religious at all just FYI my response has nothing to do with religion.
     
  12. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    2,007
    3,391
    143
    You don’t think you are treating them as sex objects but are you? Just because you don’t walk around looking at butts does not mean you don’t treat them as objects. And you say that you are open to anything they want. So what if One said I want to be monogamous? Would that be good with you?

    Look back at your posts and notice how much they focus on the sex part of these relationships? Notice also how much they focus on you, your wants and needs? And you seem to think that being stellar in bed (which you talk about a lot) and having women ogle you is what makes a relationship. It’s not. Just a heads up men that are actually good in bed rarely go around saying that. It’s the insecure men that do, and they usually know they are not so hot in bed. Likewise men saying about women gawking at you! You come over as very narcissistic but I suspect that’s mostly insecurity. There is a line between confident and arrogant.

    You have just taking the same behavior you were doing out of porn and onto women. You are overly focused on sex. Don’t you see that? Sex is not what makes a relationship.

    And mark my words when I tell you this is going to crash and burn and you are going to hurt women. But that’s not really my point for calling you out here. It’s your mentality. You may have stopped porn but you are still thinking like an addict.
     
  13. FapFapFapNoMore

    FapFapFapNoMore Fapstronaut

    126
    146
    43
    Geez, you are starting to sound like one of those radical feminists accusing men of rape when all they ever wanted from men was attention that they are not getting. You are not my counselor. And...of course, if one said she wants a monogamous relationship then that's what I'd want. I have self-control. If I sound narcissistic, I don't really care what I say because I'm pretty blunt I guess? and oh oh oh oh no ahaha I'm so bad in bed and I'm so proud of it. Now attack me with your those words...I am still standing :)
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  14. FapFapFapNoMore

    FapFapFapNoMore Fapstronaut

    126
    146
    43
    Well good for you buddy boy. I wish I had a wife like yours and morals like yours. but right now I'm looking to rock and roll. If the right one shows up, then I can stop rockin and rollin' that's just how life is.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  15. MCStruggler

    MCStruggler Fapstronaut

    10
    11
    3
    I'm glad that you have beat PMO for good hopefully & I'm happy for you that you have a girlfriend & became more sociable & confident in dealing with women but Reading your post made me feel a bit uncomfortable since you dont seem to be really into your girlfriend & it almost seems as if you seduced her just for the sake of having a girlfriend & getting laid which I (partially because of my religious ideals) i find very wrong but also quite risky for you in the long run if you keep focussing too much on women & their attributes (& perhaps basing your selfworth too much on their approval) may lead you back to pmo or on the slippery slope to an even more destructive & related addiction: Full on sex addiction.....

    I dont want to come over as what we call in dutch doomthinker/doomsdayprophetbut my main point is that women should not become a goal by themselves since they are just a need & means to get what every human being really longs for which are attention appriciation, affection, stability & most importantly love which we all will give & receive when we will seek our content & happiness within ourselves first before we go out looking for it in desires or other places where we will not find it
     
    Last edited: Mar 9, 2018
  16. Regardless, you are insulting this man on something which has no grounds for insult. What he chooses to do with his life is his own choice. And according to him, all parties involved are absolutely fine. All of you people attacking him for having an open relationship need to open your eyes. Although PMO is a negative result of the sexual revolution, this isn't one as well.
     
  17. FapFapFapNoMore

    FapFapFapNoMore Fapstronaut

    126
    146
    43
    oh no no, there's no insult at all:) It's so fun to hear from both sides of the coin. It's like watching babies argue over an ice cream cone.
     
  18. Lol
     
  19. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    2,007
    3,391
    143
    No one is attacking him for having an open relationship. There is nothing wrong with that. But this is a forum for pmo addicts in recovery and their partners. It’s not about his relationship. It’s about the words and the way he sees these women. If the goal is to truly overcome pmo addiction and the mentality then that’s not what’s going on here.

    Then you have pmo addicts all men giving the op the atta boy. Of course because they have the same mentality. The addicts in recovery are the ones also saying no this is not healthy at all. If you are a pmo addict looking to recover who do you think are the best people to give you advice? Those in recovery for sometime or other addicts? And if you are looking for advice on dating women and how they think and act who is best to advise you on that? Other dudes who are porn addicts?

    This is not radical feminism and I said nothing about rape. I also never insulted anyone. If you are insulted by the truth or a different perspective then maybe you should rethink your actions. Just because you don’t like what someone is saying does not mean it’s an insult!

    And if you think I’m in the minority the OP should post his original post and comments thereafter over in the partners section where it’s almost all women and some ex addicts in long term recovery. See what the women and those men have to say about this. Then I suppose all of them are radical feminists or religious zealots?
     

Share This Page