Frustrated and angry : can't get erection when I'm standing up

Discussion in 'Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunctions' started by nofepfepforlife, Jun 24, 2017.

  1. nofepfepforlife

    nofepfepforlife Fapstronaut

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    I'm still struggling with this BS issue. I can maintain it standing if I'm really aroused and constantly stimulating but this doesn't always work. Often the mood, feeling and blood flow will just cease if I go from seated to standing. The ONLY TIME this never happens is when I first wake up. Not even necessarily a morning wood, just from morning arousal. I can get out of bed and maintain my erection just fine standing up. Any other time of the day it just cant happen. Since I've noticed this issue I've only been able to maintain a standing one (outside of mornings) ONCE and that was for a fair while and it stayed 100% hard so I cannot for the life of me find the clue here as to what is causing this problem.

    PLEASE I'm begging this forum to help me, I can't find reliable information anywhere on the internet on this issue, it's driving me fucking mad. I don't want to have to awkwardly sit down, get hard then have sex every time I need to, this is BULLSHIT!

    I've heard its pelvic floor, mind-muscle connection, conditioning from seated fapping for a long time etc etc but no one offers a clear cut treatment. I can't figure out if it's reverse or normal kegals or certain stomach exercise like "Hypopressive " and "low pressure". WTH am I meant to do!? This is making me so angry and frustrated especially because no one can give me any answers. I have no idea what I did right that one time in the afternoon and I have no idea what physically changes to allow me to maintain one standing in the MORNINGS! Mind you not once since I noticed this problem have I been able to get one whilst already standing, I ALWAYS have to be seated or laying down first. Laying on my back or side I can get erections just fine, seated I can just find. I cannot do it if I'm on my knees or standing and if I get one before that It's a great struggle to maintain it.
     
  2. FlatlineFred

    FlatlineFred Fapstronaut

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    What is the special part about getting an e standing up that you find important?

    Most folks make out on a couch or bed.

    How is the standing part important?
     
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  3. nofepfepforlife

    nofepfepforlife Fapstronaut

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    Basically makes doggy style impossible and probably missionary too. The other night it seemed missionary might've been possible. Either way, what if during sex I need to move around/change positions then I lose my boner because of this condition?
     
  4. nofepfepforlife

    nofepfepforlife Fapstronaut

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    Found this on another forum. It falls inline with the whole mind-muscle connection and not so much with pelvic floor conditioning (i mean as far as i can tell my pelvic floor seems neither weak or particularly strong and if it were weak wouldn't that make all erections difficult?). Still strange though I have aboslutely no issue getting them on my back, my side and when seated but suddenly if im upright on my knees or i stand up i lose it and i cannot get one whilst already standing.

    anyway here's his post;

    "I had the same problem. Well, I fixed it (around 1 month of constant work).

    I am very athletic, so I cannot contribute to this problem to physical limits. I also have excellent morning erections, and sitting/laying down. I believe, as well, that my problem was caused from masterbating too much sitting down, and never standing up. I would stand up, and it would die.

    Well, here was my training:

    I would masterbate until very close to orgasm, and when I feel I'm a few seconds away, I would stand up and finish off standing up. This was to teach my brain to associate standing up as a good thing.

    After a week or so of this (once or twice a day), I would stand up half a minute before orgasm, and finish off. Erection might get a bit weaker, but I'd keep going.

    I gradually built up to being able to fully masterbate standing up. Now, I have ZERO problems. The trick is to SLOWLY get your brain accustomed to associating standing up to be something enjoyable and possitive, not negative. Hope that helped."
     
  5. FlatlineFred

    FlatlineFred Fapstronaut

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    Hmm. Shame the training involves m & p
     
  6. nofepfepforlife

    nofepfepforlife Fapstronaut

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    Indeed. I guess I'll have to wait another 4 months and practice with a girl...
     
  7. nofepfepforlife

    nofepfepforlife Fapstronaut

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    bit of an update: those hyporepressive and low pressure exercises seem to have helped with maintaining and standing erection. what i do know is that my capacity to maintain a standing erection is perfectly fine, assuming i'm sufficiently stimulated. if im horny and actually ENJOYING myself then it works fine. it just seems easier to maintain seated with less stimulation but I guess all my fears of an organic issue are ruled out. still cant get one while im already standing though. i suppose as i progress further into my reboot that aspect will continue to improve.
     
  8. I will win

    I will win Fapstronaut

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    Is getting an erection while standing up really that important?
     
  9. nofepfepforlife

    nofepfepforlife Fapstronaut

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    Yes to me it is. Being able to fuck a girl from behind or me ontop of her is extremely important. Anyway, I've established my lack of ability to maintain an erection whilist standing is at least 90% due to PIED, so that means it's curable. I did a test and it seems fine if porn is involved (yes I realise this is a relapse because I was kind of edging), but at least I can finally rule out all organic issues and know confirm to myself that it's ALL in my brain so now I can finally relax and stop stressing out so much and less stress probably means a faster and more pleasant recovery.

    Despite 6 years of porn abuse and fetishes, I can take solace in the fact my brain already has experience with a real person and the re-wiring process wont be so difficult, it's waiting for things to re-sensitise that will be the long path.
     
  10. FlatlineFred

    FlatlineFred Fapstronaut

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  11. nofepfepforlife

    nofepfepforlife Fapstronaut

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    its
    slowly improving...kind. i think ive figured out how to resolve the issue (mostly), it'll just take time and practice.
     
  12. drkarim

    drkarim Fapstronaut

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    is there any updates i havethe same problem of keeping standing erections
     
  13. Bobeed

    Bobeed Fapstronaut

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    I have the same problem, advice is welcome
     
    nofepfepforlife likes this.
  14. drkarim

    drkarim Fapstronaut

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    we can discuss it if u want ...for instance what do u think is the exact cause?
     
    nofepfepforlife likes this.
  15. nofepfepforlife

    nofepfepforlife Fapstronaut

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    I still have no idea! It seems to have improved SLIGHTLY as my PIED symptoms get better. I read this is a possible symptom of "sexual exhaustion". I'm not sure about that though...As Ive said before, if I have morning wood I can stand up and walk around with a boner in the mornings but if I get a boner in the middle of the day or evening whilst seated, it will go down if I stand up. Only sometimes I can maintain it standing up if I sufficiently stimulated/aroused. I still cant get boners while already standing up though, it just gets a little semi-hard but NEVER erect. There was ONE time in the last several months that I managed to get hard while seated in the middle of the day and then walk around with a 100% erection and it wouldn't subside for 30+ seconds and no stimulation was required. I wish I knew what I did to make that happen. I only remember doing a bit of a kegal as I noticed it dying down a little bit so MAYBE this is actually a pelvic floor issue. But I aboslutely cannot be sure if it's a weak or tense pelvic floor. Worse, it would be imbalanced in certain areas thus making the issue far more complicated.

    I've read all over the internet; it would be conditioning, mind-muscle connection, purely mental, pelvic floor, sexual exhaustion..but nothing has yielded a satisfying answer yet. My best guess this is a combination of pelvic floor conditioning, mental conditioning (fapping seated for years) and a symptom of PIED/sexual exhaustion. So our best hope to to treat the PIED symptoms and TRAIN ourselves to associate arousal with standing up. I don't believe this will cure us but I did read one guy managed to cure HIMSELF by masturbating laying down/seated like usual but as he was getting close to climax he would use the last 30-60 seconds of masturbation standing, making sure he climaxed while standing and after a week of this he managed to cure himself. I don't know if this made it so he could get erections while already standing up though, but it did make sure he could maintain them while standing.

    My situation was worse at the beginning of reboot but I noticed that if I get hard seated then stand up and fap, the erection and libido doesn't instantly die anymore if I'm aroused enough and doing stimulation, so at least it's improved a little bit with my PIED symptoms (as in if I'm aroused enough it can stay up) but it still doesn't explain the physical aspect of the problem. Why can I maintain erections standing up in the morning? Why can't I GET them whilst already standing up!? If I have a wet dream and I have post-hardness I can still walk around with that erection. It completely beats me. And what's more frustrating is I still haven't found any solid answers to this on the internet and I highly doubt any doctors would help us because modern medicine is sadly still very backward when it comes to male sexual health and functioning and of course most doctors will just tell us it's in our head and to take blue pills.
     
    drkarim likes this.
  16. nofepfepforlife

    nofepfepforlife Fapstronaut

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    I read it's due to an overly tense pelvic floor. So I guess our fapping habbits made our floors weak (in my case it was fapping seated nearly every day for 6 years a long with a smokers cough and angry yelling :/) so when the floor is weak it becomes very tense to compensate sort of...like if it's weak it has to work harder all the time to hold everything together and thus you get a tense floor. I plan to balance this with certain exercises. I still want to do kegals because they improve my EQ and keep my glans inflated but I also realised that when standing my floor muscles ARE actually tense and are being sucked in/pulled up all the time. I consciously relaxed them and realised how tense and uptight the the floor is.

    If anyone else suspects pelvic floor issues please post in this thread.
     
  17. Drew140

    Drew140 Guest

    Try 5 grams of L Arginine for 6 weeks daily. It helps circulation. Limit MO has much as possible. It's an amino acid and perfectly safe. I have ED and My doctor gave me the clearance to take it. In the morning on an empty stomach. The pills are big but it's worth it.
     
  18. Drew140

    Drew140 Guest

    You will be firmer during the day, nice sex drive, and when I relapsed I exploded like a volcano. Yes I get boners standing up. I'd also rest your dick and make sure during sex you use a lot of lube.
     
  19. nofepfepforlife

    nofepfepforlife Fapstronaut

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    I did take l arginine and pycnogenol together for a month and it made no difference to my problem. i simply cant get full erections when im standing up and i have usually lose them very quickly if i get hard i the seated position then stand up. only sometimes i can stay hard when standing up if i keep the stimulation going and other times my libido and penis die soon as i stand up. its just gonna be a bit embarassing during sex that ill have to explain i need to be laying down and/or on my side first to get hard THEN try for missionary/doggy position.
     
  20. Drew140

    Drew140 Guest

    And as you said you had all your plumbing checked out right?
     

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