Five months in loneliness is starting to kick in

Ive been sober for five months. The anixety is activated when I contemplate relapsing to be honest. I hate porn. I find the idea of people actually enjoying a woman give herself for profit appauling. I know it's only natural for us human beings to have carnal desires and such. Some of us are more liberal or conservative about it than others. I've improved greatly because of nofap I've lost weight, I'm more active, but I still feel like I struggle with my game. I've never been exactly a pick up artist or a master with the ladies to say the least. I'm a funny guy I make them laugh but that's really it. I'm not exactly experienced I never really sealed the deal ever. Twenty and a virgin. I'm just not the kind of person to give myself to any girl. I have to love her or feel Some type of way. That's where the loneliness is setting in. I think I used porn to cope with loneliness. Since the web is filled with millions of women, I just fapped to whatever woman I felt chose. It wasnt the real thing however so I basically conformed to an illusion. Im not the kind of person to use people to sit here and enjoy them physically and then abandon them when I'm gratified. It's not who I am. I refuse to go back to porn because it killed me inside. I still have my morals but I'm trying to become the man I should have been had I never encountered this disgusting plague. I'm just trying my best to connect with a female and see if I can cure this loneliness but at this point I'm contemplating giving myself to the first female that wants it what should I do to combat this loneliness? I'm trying my best to purge myself of stimulants I'm trying to quit drinking I dont do drugs my only form of releasing endorphins is exercise and friends but what can I do to combat this loneliness I feel sometimes.

 

What do you mean? Explain.

 

Couldn't agree more. My whole life I've always craved love and girls and that's honestly why I feel miserable I think. If I sit here and just push it It out im positive I can truly find happiness thanks man.