Feeling Sorry about myself

I think it's more common than you think. Barely .01% of guys are happy out there or have it all for them. Everyone else is struggling. They just put on a face of happiness cause no one likes to put forth the image of unhappiness. But in reality everyone is going through emotional problem or some other problem(financial, medical, legal, etc)

It's good to be nice but sadly it doesn't always work. There are other qualities as well. Punctual, good smell, interesting, funny, hardworking, reliable, trustworthy.

 

True. I had meaningless sex just cause I was ashamed at being a virgin and now I regret it forever. I was suicidal after it. So it's okay to wait. And to be honest sex is overrated. I'm 27 and if I never have sex it's okay with me.

 

I think you know basing your value on how you perceive others view you is not good. It is easy enough to do because we want positive feedback. But if you really are a nice guy then I bet a lot of folks would think a lot of you. These folks may not know you, but if they did then they'd think so. These would themselves be really good people. Good people see the value in goodness. I would think the opinion of good people, even if you don't know them, would count more than the opinion of not so good people even if you do know them. My point is just because you may not see positive feedback in your everyday life doesn't mean that people don't value you.

I get feeling down when you don't see the results you want in life. That is natural enough. But what else can you do but keep doing what you are doing, the right thing? With the perspective of age I've realized a lot of what I wanted wasn't really good for me. I realized a lot of the people I thought were happy because they had sex or something else I didn't have were not in fact happy. I also realized when I did finally get the things I wanted that other people had that it didn't make me happy. And it really didn't make me happy if I compromised myself in some way to get it.

 

I also had that "virginity stress" mate! I still have I guess. Had few attempts with hookers, but I was failing all the time. And the pressure! It was hard for me wven to exist - so I understand you perfectly my friend!
Well... the only thing we have is trying. Don't give up. The day when we will forgive and respect ourselves again is near. I believe in it.

 

I'm going thru that except with my ex. I am the reason we broke up. She was everything you could ask for i swear to you. Model, can sing, cook, etc... I fucked it all up for porn. I chose porn over her. I hate myself for that choice and I will never forget that. I'm moving on but it's not easy at all. Especially after 3 years.

 

Dude you're 22! What are you stressing about? Having sex shouldn't be about satisfying anyone's curiosity, it should be something you're willing to do once you've managed to bond with the girl of your dreams, otherwise it's pointless, meaningless and chances are you'll forget you even had it shortly after. As of right now I'm a virgin as well, I had a sexual experience with a great girl but I did feel like we were moving too fast so I put a stop to it and I figured there's no need to rush or do it for the sake of our curiosity.

There are people who are virgins, older than us, unemployed, sit at home doing nothing but playing videogames and guess what?
They're way happier and less stressed than we are simply because they love themselves and they don't *need* anything outside of their comfort zone, they love themselves and what they do, not saying this is an ideal lifestyle - it's just that if you don't love yourself and who you are, others won't either.

If you had a good childhood you can just remember those days, not a care in the world... If you truly believe you're a good person and you do good deeds then the Universe will eventually answer all your prayers, but first you need to relax and have patience!

 

Ahh I understand. I had the curiosity to drive a motorbike. I'm 27 and still don't know how to drive. Ended up in an accident. Glad no one got injured.

Maybe some stuff are better when we see others and learn. Like we had curiosity to touch fire or feel an electric shock. Eventually it went away.

On a slightly different note, we never know what's good for us. At times some curiosities shouldn't be entertained. Like curiosity to take drugs or get drunk. I tried beer but didnt enjoy it. Haven't drunk more than 1 glass.

at times we have to do stuff we dont like, for example take medicines. And at times we have to not go towards stuff we may like. Like porn. Not sure if it makes much sense.

Also sex shouldnt be the only curiosity. you would have other curiosities as well. I had to go on a solo trip. There are other curiosities and other sources in dopamine.
grow plants
cook food
dance
sing
hang out with friends
watch a movie
play a prank
pet an animal
go for a motorcycle ride
laze on a hammock

There are other curiosities than sex. This is from someone who regrets losing his virginity. I mean bah...

 

I can relate to this a lot. The whole being a virgin thing completely burned me up inside it started to drive me insane. A constant mental block which I could just not overcome and it made me seriously socially awkward because I could not figure out why everyone else was getting laid and having girlfriends whereas I had nothing going for me. People kept telling me that I’m a good looking guy yet I still was not getting any results. And just seeing guys who were not as good looking and overweight with girlfriends who most guys would think were out of their league made me feel like something was wrong with me.

Its all about confidence and mind-set once you have that figured out anything is possible. What I did to overcome this was a bit extreme but you know what they say desperate people will do anything. So to get over this irrational mental block of being a virgin I took the advice from one of my friends. Now he had mentioned escorts before but I never really took him seriously at all I did not want to go down that path. It was not until a year later when my situation was still the same that I decided to finally do it. And you know what it was a huge relief and a massive weight off my shoulders because your mind will constantly be giving you negative thoughts. In my case I had these negative affirmations “I’m still a virgin” and "I cant get laid" that would play through my head every single day. That no longer happens anymore because I have overcome that mental block that was holding me back. I got over my negative thoughts of never having first, second or third base or a BJ all in one night.

Fast forward a few more years and I have picked up hundreds of girl’s phone numbers, been on countless dates and a few months ago I had a one-night stand, no need for escorts anymore I have the proof and belief that I can actually DO it. So I’m not saying that you should sleep with an escort I’m just saying that you have a serious mental block and you NEED to overcome it by doing something about it otherwise all this worrying will make you sick.

 

I think I know how you feel. But try not to worry about it. Don't focus on women so much and focus on pursuing your passions. I know quite a number of people who've ended up meeting their SO when they weren't even looking for them. From what I know about women is that they love men who are passionate, and the way you become passionate is pursuing your passion. I should add women like men who are confident as well and you'll become confident when you pursue your passion.