Failed after 7 days Everytime!

Hi B.Wayne - Welcome! Thanks for sharing your story with us. Isn’t it nice to be able to get that off your chest without worrying about being judged by people who don’t understand your predicament? I can tell that you sincerely want PMO out of your life. Be grateful for that desire! It will be the catalyst for changing your unwanted behavior. Having that desire is a great first step. I want you to know that we know exactly what you are going through. Fighting those urges is hell on earth, wouldn’t you agree? It sounds like you have come to realize the gravity of your situation, now what can be done about it? The answer is PLENTY! Hope is not lost my friend. People overcome this problem all the time, and they are just as entrenched if not more so than you are. Is it hard to do? Unfortunately yes, it will require you to put in some serious effort. If you are willing to do whatever it takes then I say you are ready to start your journey today.
Here are a few pointers to start with:

1. Use this website to your advantage. Learn how to use it first. Start your day tracker. Read what people are doing, follow people who have similar stories to your own.

2. Start a journal in the journals forum. This will allow you to write down and keep track of your thoughts and feelings. Being able to see thought and behavior patterns is a crucial part of avoiding the PMO pit. Your journal will also serve as an update to the community on your progress. It’s a good place to ask questions and to get feedback and ideas from your friends on this site. You can track how many days you have gone, it helps you be accountable for your actions - you have to be honest with yourself and everyone else, even when the truth hurts.

3. Set other goals for yourself. You need to take control of other areas of your life so that you start believing that you control your own destiny. Exercise is an excellent thing to do as it helps burn off some (not all) of that sexual tension. Maybe make a goal to journal every day. Goals that get you out of your comfort zone are especially effective. I take cold showers every day and it isn’t very fun but I do it because I need to convince myself that I can do hard things. What scares the hell out of you? If public speaking scares you then join a Toastmasters club, etc, etc, etc. Masurbation is an escape from uncomfortable or difficult situations. When you tackle uncomfortable situations in a healthy way you gain mental stamina, the stamina required to someday kick your PMO habit. You gain confidence that you can overcome adversity without turning to your PMO crutch. Goals will also help take your mind off your predicament, they keep you busy and productive. If all you are thinking about is how badly you don’t want to PMO, I have bad news for you, you will become a victim of you own obsessive thoughts.

4. Become aware of how your thoughts and feelings lead you down the path to PMO. Look into meditation, you will become aware of your thoughts as they come and go. You will learn to not allow thoughts to control your emotions.

5. Don’t beat yourself up! The reality of your situation is that you have a deep seated addiction but it is only a problem and it can be dealt with! It can be overcome. As you start your journey to reboot you will have setbacks and disappointments. Joining this website won’t magically help you never PMO again. What it will do is help you be more self aware. You will learn as you fall and pick yourself up over and over and over again. But this journey is different because you may fall but you are learning from your mistakes and you are becoming wiser and you learn what you will do differently the next time. But never let “learning” be an excuse to purposely PMO. I say this because our minds look for any excuse to get that dopamine hit. You may discover that there are multiple reasons why you PMO. You must find ways to defend yourself against each reason.

B.Wayne, you can do this! There are so many people on this site ready to help you! We want for you what we want for ourselves! We are all recovering and rebooting. We are all on different parts of our journeys (I’m on day six!) so we will need you to be here for us as well. We need your encouraging words, we need your good example, we need to know when you have success and failures so we can also learn from your experiences. As you encourage others on this website you will feel hope and self confidence enter into your life.

So welcome B.Wayne! You’re in good company my friend. We are stronger when we do this together. You’ll do great!

 

Thanks. Can you tell that I’m passionate about the topic?

 

B.Wayne, you are very welcome! If you ever need to chat please feel free to PM me. I hear you loud and clear on the overwhelming powerful uncomfortable urges that come - they are so horrible! You feel doomed to despair, like you are being sucked into a black hole. You feel powerless and you know that it is only a matter of time before they get the best of you. These urges are the reason why I have reset over and over again. There have been periods in my life where I could only go 7 days and then I would PMO. However, I have had some success in the past - there was a time where those urges lasted for 3 full days and nights. The urges were relentless. I frantically tried to do anything else to get my mind off it. I thought I would go insane. I was in hell. I came out the other side mentally exhausted but I was so glad that I proved to myself that I could do it. I was able to go for about 45 days after that. Then I forgot that I had a problem, then it snuck up on me and bit me in the rear end!

I look forward to seeing you progress and especially reading your first journal entry . Let me know if you have any questions or if I can help you get your feet wet here.

 

Glad to hear it B.Wayne. You will! Put in the required effort and you will. I hope you have a great day! Just make it through today, take a step forward and be strong today.