Expressing Yourself To Women - The Conundrum

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by aps1991, Jul 29, 2017.

  1. aps1991

    aps1991 Fapstronaut

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    Hi,

    What's the best way to express your true feelings to a woman you're attracted to?

    In my experience simply going up to them and telling them that I think they're sexy just gets a "thanks" and the conversation dies immediately. However the alternative of focusing on getting to know them presents the danger of never saying what you truly feel i.e. staying in your comfort zone and consequently putting yourself in the friend zone. Once I focus on getting to know a woman I'm attracted to I fear that telling them how I truly feel about them will kill off any further interactions with them. I'd rather have them as a friend than not have them in my life at all.

    Don't get me wrong - I think it's really important to get to know the woman properly. I couldn't date a woman I have no connection to. But I need to find the middle ground of getting to know them while also expressing my true feelings if I want to engage in a quality romantic relationship with a woman. Any advice?

    Andrew
     
  2. Karimtolstoi

    Karimtolstoi Fapstronaut

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    I share the same point of view : without establishing a connection first there is no need to express your feelings to a woman.
     
  3. faplordxd

    faplordxd Fapstronaut

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    Wait until she does dont even mention liking her or compliment her looks until after you guys fuck
     
  4. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

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    The approach is better if you make causal conversation from there. I'm female if this helps. Telling a woman you don't know that she's sexy usually comes off as creepy. If the woman is quite attractive she's heard compliments about her appearance daily and so another one means nothing. You have to connect with her on another level. After the initial meeting I say the best effort is to show you are attracted to her. So practice flirting, pull out her chair hold open the door. Set up dates. Then say things like you look amazing today. Don't use sex or sexy. The guys that get friend zoned fall into two categories . The first would have been friend zoned no matter what they did as the woman just does not find him attractive. That one is out of your control. The second one is a man who waits too long to make a move. If she lies you but you don't kiss her for two months she's friend zoned you and you don't come back.
     
    Salt, Runtilmylegsdropoff and aps1991 like this.
  5. aps1991

    aps1991 Fapstronaut

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    This is a really useful answer, GG2002 - thank you. It's fantastic to get the female perspective on this issue. The not knowing what the woman is thinking is what contributes most to my anxiety in this, so your answer helps reduce that.

    Your suggested approach sounds balanced, sensible and in line with my values (unlike the pick-up artist drivel I've fallen for in the past).
     
    GG2002 likes this.

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