Ed from nerve damage/excessive masturbation

Discussion in 'Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunctions' started by Addicted98, Jul 26, 2018.

  1. Addicted98

    Addicted98 Fapstronaut

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    So before I go into my Ed I'm going to let everyone in on my habits and everything. I eat pretty good meaning protein a good amt of carbs and some fats I'm about 180lbs and I'm 19 almost 20 I smoke weed prettt much everyday. I workout ocasoccasion I'm not obese anymore and I drink alot of water and have pretty decent sleep a solid 6-9 hours every night. Aside from the nights I would masturbate or stay up late but the next day I usually had off from work so I ended up getting the missed sleep( but there were nights i would keep my self up just to climax. I had a relationship sexually with another girl but I only got Ed whenever we would have sex more than 3 or 4 times in a day me and her would do 7 as our record one day. we're we nymphos together eventually our 2 years of sexual experiences stopped whenever we broke up. We we're apart for about 6 months roughly I went back to her because I felt I loved her but I think I was just at the time really addicted to sexual touch of any kind. I masturbated alot sometimes even 3 or 4 times when I wouldn't see her during the whole relationship.whenrever I'd be bored and alone I'd usually jackoff. during this break I was 18and had a one night stand and rocked this girl's world which is why I still have some confidence and whenever I am hard I'm 7.5 so i don't really feel small. Before getting back together with my nymphos girlfriend i became even more Infatuated with porn which lead to the 3 to 4 times a day like a said. I would premature ejac all the time whenever we got back together but I also was able to have long sex during the time as well with her which now I see as a sign of the too much madturmastur. We ended up breaking our relationship off after about a month of getting back together because of her going to rehab and aborting our kid without letting me know. After our relationship ended I kept up the masturbation at the same pace I eventually started losing a desire for female contact at school because no girl showed any desire for me at all I turned to porn. I became addicted I eventually sucumbed to edging because it was the most pleasurable for me alone and it felt like I was cumming like abpornstar really because I would have such a backed up load from edging but at the same time it literally forced me to masturbate less because after a long amt of stimulation it gets harder to get an erection.i started buying sex toys and lube alot and even had a porn membership I was spending alot of my hard earned money just to get off when I could have been impressing a real girl. I extremely regret all the rough masturbation and dry palm now because it makes me feel so much further from ever getting the nerve tissue back. also didn't always have the money for lube so I would dry palm all the time untill it was the norm.Eventually my masturbation has slowed down to like once or twice a day (because of edging). I've been looking at porn for about 8 to 9 years now without taking a month off or anything Im alot more fit than when I started masturbating. Everyone supported getting a sextoy if i was so horny so I did and my addiction depends further out of control having the pocket pussy made it feel like I could pleasure myself just like a woman but without the emotional connection. It has been about a year and a half since ive been with the nympho so time wise it hasnt been that long so it has been awhile since I've had sex. I've gained confidence in my body but I've lost it in my dick the other night I had not jacked off in a day or so and went to hangout with a girl we made out and got all in the mood and everything was going amazing o was rubbing her and she was getting super turned on and I had a pretty solid hard boner and we we're about tohave sex and I felt pretty rock hard but we couldn't have sex because her sister had to stop by. So then I jacked off the next day and there was another two day masturbation break so I figured I would be perfect when the time came to get a hard dick.( I did this whenever I had the 1st break with my girlfriend and rocked the girl's world.) Anyway time had come and I brought her over to my house I was having stomach issues the day of but not at the time of the desired sex we had taken an edible and smoked a bowl and took a dab. Both of us use cannibis as a medicine I use it for my anxiety and she uses it for sleep and appetite. Anyway we start 69ing which in hindsight reallyrwasnt the smartest idea I should've just went straight for it lol. it feels amazing I love the way it feels in her mouth did that for like 5 mins then i eventually just want to take her so then I put her on her back and my dick is a boner I stick it in tons of ecstasy it felt amazing and for the first like 30 seconds I was going strong but then I just started fucking her faster thinking shit is she even enjoying. it so I started going faster for her and lost it all together and I just go limp not I wasn't rock hard when I put it in but shit I wasn't limp. I then ask her to blow me after it goes limp and eventually after seeing her stuggle to suck me hard we eventually stop. Everything that she was doing was turning me on and all the sucking felt like i was fucking a pornstar I almost just couldn't feel anything in my dick by the end of the blowjob it almost felt numb but it wasn't it was almost like overstimulated. I felt so embarrassed and It brought back feelings of my anxiety that started from my ex girlfriend I just felt at a loss for words besides I was "too high and felt overstimulated". The next morning it was only about after a 6 hour nap that was kinda scattered so I might have had a lot less testosterone but regardless I should've been able to get a hard on for a girl I like this much.i woke up and I made my move again we started kissing and my dick started to get hard and in the heat of the moment I ripped off my pants before I was fullyhard and got in position to have sex and it went limp instantly my mind is filled with doubt and distress and I start rushing to put my clothes back on. I honestly don't want to watch porn anymore I just wanted a girl like the one the other night I think she likes me back but definitely not sexually after what happened. I just feel scared because I feel like I've damaged my tissue and or my brains pathways for seeing nude imagery/being able to stay hard with a woman I love and I think is perfect. Just looking for some guidance please.
     
  2. Addicted98

    Addicted98 Fapstronaut

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    Heres my update I haven't watched porn in a good 5 days it's not much of a struggle. I've been ready to quit porn for awhile but I felt like I needed a female to make me orgasm everyday or even twice a day so in my mind I was making myself a better man by masturbating and training my dick to stay hard for awhile through edging. I look back at this decision and didn't realize how stupid I was to really think I couldn't damage myself. I think ii reall was just masturbating because of my depression/loneliness. But now that I have a girl I really like and am attracted to I just feel so determined to stop coldturkey. After I graduated school I stoppedseeing my peers everyday and most of my friends went into military so it kinda leftme with a social gap for females. But now that I've found the perfect one I just wantto love her heart out. I just am hoping so bady that she'll accept me for who I amand that I don't have irreversible damage. I use cannibis as my medicine but I am going make major cutbacks to my smoking the only reason I'm not so adimant about doing this is because i use it as medicine for my scoliosis. Sometimes my back will hurt really bad when I'm not smoking that's why I do it.
     
  3. Addicted98

    Addicted98 Fapstronaut

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    I am going to quit smoking blunts for a awhile too starting tonight I know the tobacco isn't good for my blood flow. I now think back to when I first started smoking weed and had run out and started smoking blunts with no weed for the tobacco high out of a bong (so it was pretty intense and pmo but this was prior to the good sexual experience with the one night stand girl. But this still must have had attributed to my condition now. I feel like the tobacco was only making my m addiction worse. I was depressed and just want a way out so I would pmo everyday for so long it sucks now because I look back and I was so addicted that I hadn't really noticed my problem I felt I was doing it all perfect. I regret being so blind before this is another part of the healing journey I need to take.
     
  4. Addicted98

    Addicted98 Fapstronaut

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    Even though I've only been doing the wraps it still is tobacco.
     
  5. Addicted98

    Addicted98 Fapstronaut

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    Day 6 no blunts or or pmo still going strong. Had slight morning wood.
     
  6. Addicted98

    Addicted98 Fapstronaut

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    Almost relasped seeing porn tonight whenever I was gonna show my friend my followers.
     
  7. Addicted98

    Addicted98 Fapstronaut

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    Relapsed on the blunts at a party with my friend going back in the Navy which sucked. But at the same time last night two separate girls checked me out one set was some girls in a car at the stoplight and at Walmart. How is it that as soon as my pied happens all of the girls start talking to me like wtffffff. Also feeling sort of hopeless about my dick and the damage I may have done. I've been having sort of an easier time peeing if that counts for anything.
     
  8. I know how you feel dude. This is my 3rd reboot and now that I'm taking it seriously, I feel like girls seem more interested in me. I will admit that not ejaculating for almost 3 weeks is kind of making me more aggressive. besides that, don't feel hopeless. I feel I've done damage to my penis over the last 13* years. I can't hold an erection standing up and when a girl is riding on top. My erection angle is also low and leans towards the right.

    My suggestion
    would be to leave your d*ck alone, stay away from porn, eat clean and get some hobbies. You only get one penis so take care of it... I wish I could have my 18-year-old penis back. I'm 28 now. Sex isn't over for me but the bad habits and abuse surely are.

    (Supplement L-Arginine for blood flow and or check out a product called steel libido red)
     
  9. Addicted98

    Addicted98 Fapstronaut

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    These nights I find the hardest not jacking off because I have absolutely nothing to do aside from get stoned and play Xbox.
     
  10. MarinoBigFan1984

    MarinoBigFan1984 Fapstronaut

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