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Do you guys ever feel like you stop being yoursrlf when you come across a pretty girl?

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Kman20, Nov 1, 2018.

  1. Kman20

    Kman20 Fapstronaut

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    Somewhere along the line a girl comes intk your life and wow she’s cute. You kind of stop working on yourself. Stop pursuing your hobbies. Stop focusing on your career. Hanging out with this girl and trying to make her your girlfriend becomes your new priority and being around her just seems so much more fun than investing in yourself. And you start acting fake when you’re with her or for her. Do you guys ever feel like this ? I mean you could keep doing what you were doing before you came across her but you feel like you’re missing out.
     
  2. I had felt that way when I was younger and found it was not benefting me. I found being myself and doing what I like actually drew in women that stick around more than when I used to act fake and needy just because she looked hot. Find women that like you as you are
     
  3. charlie78

    charlie78 Fapstronaut

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    That's true. Being yourself is the biggest favour you can ever do to yourself when it comes to this subject.
     
    Kman20 likes this.
  4. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

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    If someone's physical attributes alone is enough for you to drop who you are (acting fake out of fear of not being good enough) and your life's priorities, then the value you place on yourself is very low and your investment in yourself was not really something you wanted to do for yourself (more so for the opinions of others).

    You will come across as someone that's not being real and someone that's willing to manipulate their way towards their hidden agenda. You will come across as someone that doesn't see "pretty" girls as real people.

    How exactly are you making them your girlfriend? You invite them out to a date. They're either interested or they're not. Why do you need to drop everything to make this a priority?

    You make the impression that you don't value yourself and you don't enjoy your life too much. So why would anybody else want to be with you? Acting fake isn't the answer. Having a pretty girlfriend will probably make things worst for you in the long run. Especially after she's figured out that you don't respect yourself much and that you were being fake the entire time.

    Maybe it's a combination of a self esteem issue and a lack of experience issue for you.
     
    JKnight and Kman20 like this.
  5. Kman20

    Kman20 Fapstronaut

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    You make the impression that you don’t value yourslef and you don’t enjoy your life too much. This strikes me because mahbe I’m not doing anything that’s really all that fun.

    I’ve noticed times when I’d be having a lot of fun and think I’d rather be doing this than hanging out with a girl or chasing girls. I guess I need to keep working on it. Thanks for your reply.
     
    charlie78 likes this.
  6. elevate

    elevate Fapstronaut

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    It's not that you should do one and drop the other. You can do both.

    Aim to get to a point where you can enjoy your life and at any time you feel like it you can invite people to join your life. They either will or they won't, but either way you're fine with it. It's just a bonus if they want to join you.

    The problem is when you're needing someone else to make your life worth living and it's no good without that other person or you're trying to create a lifestyle for the sole purpose of what someone else would want or think about it rather than something you would actually want.

    If you don't have that life currently, you can still invite someone into your life and work on it as you go. Just be more aware of your motives behind what you're doing and who you're doing it for.
     
    Kman20 likes this.

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