1. Welcome to NoFap! We have disabled new forum accounts from being registered for the time being. In the meantime, you can join our weekly accountability groups.
    Dismiss Notice

[Discussion] Porn in couple

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by Marcothebest_1995, Oct 27, 2017.

  1. Marcothebest_1995

    Marcothebest_1995 Fapstronaut

    519
    774
    93
    Hey there, I want to start a discussion.
    While I was brushing my teeth this morning, I thought "ok, I'm now in NoFap and I am abstaining from Porn and Masturbation. What if I find a girlfriend and she wants one day to watch porn with me?"
    At first I thought "it's different, I am not alone and she would take care of me", then I thought that the fantasies I am suffocating would sneak back into my brain. And I thought "would smoking with friends be less harmful for my health? If I were an alcoholist, I would be forced to abstain also from the beer with a friend. I would never take heroine even in company, for sure. I suppose that as P is an addiction, I should use this mentality.

    Now I'm sticking to this mentality. I want your opinion, guys. Let the debate begin
     
  2. somatochrome

    somatochrome Fapstronaut

    12
    13
    3
    I think the answer is pretty obvious and you've reasoned it out. Addictive habits don't just vanish in the company of others.
     
    DIYAS1 and GG2002 like this.
  3. Gotham Outlaw

    Gotham Outlaw Fapstronaut

    579
    3,902
    123
    That is the right mentality to have. If you get a girlfriend she's going to find out about your porn addiction and nofap journey anyways, and wouldn't want to tempt you.
     
    DIYAS1, GG2002 and Marcothebest_1995 like this.
  4. Byris

    Byris Fapstronaut

    126
    265
    63
    Personally, I always thought the use of porn while in a relationship was kinda sad, I find it's kind of like telling the other person, you're not enough for me, I need someone else to get off, especially when they're together watching it.
     
  5. Why watch porn? Get you a gf and make your own. I mean you don't have to film it but play dress up and do the porn thing. Did a few times with some old GFs and it was fun. Much better than watching porn.
     
    DIYAS1 and Marcothebest_1995 like this.
  6. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    2,007
    3,391
    143
    Exactly.
     
  7. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    2,007
    3,391
    143
    I think this may Be partly you not accepting you will never watch porn again. You just can’t totally let it go. When you meet someone you are serious about dating you need to reveal your past pmo addiction to her. If she’s not okay with it or does not want to give up porn she’s a bad match. It’s the same Logic that an alcoholic tells the partner and she keeps getting wasted and asking him to join in!
     
    Gotham Outlaw likes this.
  8. Marcothebest_1995

    Marcothebest_1995 Fapstronaut

    519
    774
    93
    Thank you but... I don't want to watch porn anymore. I've been 27 days without porn and I feel very good (counter says day 12 as I relapsed on M).
    Just these days will be hard as I know that I'm at the month and this puts me pressure.
     
  9. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    2,007
    3,391
    143
    Sorry but you are being a bit contradictory. You say you don’t want to watch porn anymore but then say it’s the end of the month so that puts pressure on me? Most people that have a porn addiction don’t just suddenly no longer want to watch it after quitting for 27 days. There’s nothing wrong with that it’s normal but telling yourself that you are completely cured that quickly of dangerous to your recovery. Let me try this what if I said to you that you will never be able to watch porn again no matter what. Not in a relationship not on occasion not after 90 days. How does that make you feel?
     
  10. Marcothebest_1995

    Marcothebest_1995 Fapstronaut

    519
    774
    93
    Extremely comfortable. If you go to my personal journal of reboot, I can tell you that I started this route as I had a huge reject about watching porn and masturbating.
     
  11. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    2,007
    3,391
    143
    Awesome! Then I think the answer is just be open early on with your partners about your past and tell them you can’t watch porn. Even though it’s VERY difficult to find a man that does not watch porn it’s not too hard to find a woman that does not or who would not give it up for her partner. If by chance you get a woman who is not okay with that then she’s not for you. I would not worry too much. Watching porn is not that important to most women.
     
    Gotham Outlaw likes this.
  12. Pootle

    Pootle Fapstronaut

    114
    136
    43
    What happens if you gf never says she wants to watch porn with you?
     
  13. Marcothebest_1995

    Marcothebest_1995 Fapstronaut

    519
    774
    93
    I will never be even tempted slightly to do it, there would be no problem at all
     
    Pootle likes this.
  14. Why you're watching porn if you had a girlfriend or trying to find a girlfriend? I like to have the real thing.(My opinion)
     
  15. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    2,007
    3,391
    143
    That’s like asking an alcoholic in recovery if he wants to have a drink with you. You tell your gf you are a former porn addict and can’t watch it. If she still pushes it then you end things. If she loves you she won’t push you to do things that harm you. Honestly many women will be over the moon that you somt want to watch porn! Women in general watch it a lot less frequently and it’s not important to them.
     
    Gotham Outlaw likes this.
  16. GG2002

    GG2002 Fapstronaut

    2,007
    3,391
    143
    Some couples like to view porn together it spices things up for them.
     
  17. OH
     
  18. Pootle

    Pootle Fapstronaut

    114
    136
    43
    I think there may be some misunderstanding with my post - the word 'never' is deliberately placed in the sentence for good reason MacroB is contemplating and assuming a 'what if scenario' - there doesn't seem or appear to be a GF at the moment.

    If my post would have read "What happens if you gf says she wants to watch porn with you?" then your reply would be a fair challenge.

    This post is for clarification only, there is no intention to cause offence to anyone.
     

Share This Page