Delayed Ejaculation

Doesn't sound like a physical problem, or it would have affected masturbation. That seems like a good thing. My advice, from experience:

1. No more porn (and no more masturbation until at least you're better)! Your brain has, no doubt, completely fucked up it's understanding of sex and what gets you off. Added to that, you may have problems from death grip - your wife's vagina is not as tight as your fist-grip. But time can heal both of these.

2. Talk to her! This problem is going to take time to fix, and you will need her support. She may also think it's her fault. I would also recommend not letting her finish you off with hand or mouth until you're cured.

3. You probably have some anxiety about this during the act. A voice pleading inside to finish in her. This is tough, but you have to learn not to listen to the voice. Learn to have complete faith that you will fix this problem, but that it may not be overnight. Tell yourself, before and during sex, that this time you're not expecting to finish, and your goal is to enjoy the act of intimacy with your wife. Once that voice has been quietened, time will hopefully take it's course. And if you're not orgasming from any other outlet, well eventually your body and mind will (apologies for sounding crass) 'take what it's being given'.

4. To repeat slightly, time is required. It might take a month, it might take 3 months, it might take 6-12 months. I don't know. I only have my own experience. For me, I felt positive changes within weeks, and the problem was basically gone within months, with a few specific exceptions (when I just wake up, which is more related to me being a slow waker). It may be different for you, it may be the same. But try to trust the process. If it takes time, I can imagine there'll be temptation to begin M-ing again, for relief.

Hope that helps.

 

I guess you can do the PM challenge an have sex with your partner to get used to ejaculate during sexual intercourse. If she pressures you for the pregnancy but you can't ejaculate, you can masturbate during the sex and then go back to the sex to ejaculate.

 

That may help him get her pregnant but won’t help with the overall problem. Gotta stop using his hand even during sex.

 

Yes but by masturbation can't be necessarily with hands, can be body parts.

 

My apologies when the OP said he had ED and could only ejaculate with masturbation I presumed that meant his hand. I’m not quite sure how someone engaging in solo masturbation could use another body part their own? If he’s running his genitals against her body or using any part of her body that’s not masturbation. And I think that’s a good step towards retraining yourself to O differently and from a partner but that’s not going to be an effective way to impregnate a woman and I am one. You have to use your hand. And to reboot you have to break old pathways. If you are used to your hand and you keep using it even with your wife it will never heal.

I suppose the question for the writer is what is his immediate goal successful sex or pregnancy? And I have to wonder if the wife is just saying it’s pregnacy but is really concerned that he can’t perform normally in bed?

 

You need a hard mode reboot

 

From the description you give a good 45-60 days.