Day 90 but I feel so low

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Paper, Nov 30, 2018.

  1. Paper

    Paper Fapstronaut

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    I feel so depressed and sad, I feel like people start hating me, my self-esteem is so low, I don't know what to do...
     
  2. Walk_it_out

    Walk_it_out Fapstronaut

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    I'm sorry to hear man it will get better.. have you felt that way the whole time?
     
    TantusJulius likes this.
  3. Paper

    Paper Fapstronaut

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    I feel like this whole week.
     
  4. Jason_Tesla_19

    Jason_Tesla_19 Fapstronaut

    It may be a flatline, or the beginning of PAWS. Keep your chin up and keep going strong!
     
  5. end_it_for_good

    end_it_for_good Fapstronaut

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    hows your social connection?
    hows your work/school?
    hows your connection to family?
    how is it creating new romantic relationships?
     
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  6. Paper

    Paper Fapstronaut

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    I have feeling, that people no longer care what I say, like everybody who passes me by, looks at me with anger.
    With family everything is nice, haven't been home for a week.
    Being single sometimes makes me sad.
    Last week I edged for a minute, but I have feeling ,that I should reset that counter, I don't have those brainfogs, I can still easily start to communicate with people, to explain shorter- I am not that person who was before anyway, but something is wrong, but I don't want to believe, that edging can throw you back to complete zero. I don't know, today and yesterday are not cool for me, previous days were kinda cool, I got good grades in tests with ease , but I just feel sad now, I see couples everywhere, but I am all alone, When I invite people to do something, like going to the club, they are not able, I just want to talk with someone, I feel shy again...Probably I had truly thrown myself to complete start.
     
    VeganRights likes this.
  7. Man08

    Man08 Fapstronaut

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    Stay strong man! It really makes you sad to think at such things, so, don't think, or even better, accept your current situation and with faith, believe that you will have someone by your side, put this thought in the back of your mind and let things happen.I know how it feels because I felt this sadness so many times, so, I had to find a way to feel that "feeling" of having someone by your side, this got my into a world of fantasies, where I would spend time in my head dreaming at imaginary girls, bad mistake...
     
  8. Mitsuro

    Mitsuro Fapstronaut

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    Sorry to hear you are having a tough time. Hang in there, tbh edging will mess you up so stay away from that. If you feel better resetting then do, in a way the numbers are meaningless. It’s the quality of your recovery, acceptance and self acceptance especially is a vital part of recovery. You are not anywhere near back to zero, you must learn from this and move on, we can be our own worst enemies. It sounds like you need to be aware of your thoughts and the negativity they can create. One of the best tools I have used is a daily gratitude list. I’ve done one for 20 months now, I’ve got to say it has been life changing. It is all about perception and you need to shift it, I’m not saying it’s the cure but it sure helps and you have nothing to lose but a new perception to gain.
    Peace and strength to you!
     
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  9. Paper

    Paper Fapstronaut

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    Thanks mate, I start thinking about leaving this community, but not this goal, that I will just continue living as it is, without P or M, just going with the flow. I think I just need time to meditate or take a rest from daily social life and working all the time :/
     
  10. Mitsuro

    Mitsuro Fapstronaut

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    Hopefully you stay around. I agree rest is really important, as an addict I never really knew how to rest properly and to some extent I still find it hard. It’s becuase I wear myself out mentally, even when I’m not doing anything I would be worrying and overthinking. Yes meditation is great, look up self compassion and self love ones, it sounds like you have being very hard on yourself and would benefit a lot from cultivating a base of self support.
     
  11. Harvey27-_-

    Harvey27-_- New Fapstronaut

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    Dude its just a phase, any masturbation or porn will ruin you even more. Keep motivated. The longer you keep dedicated the better it will be
     
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  12. Paper

    Paper Fapstronaut

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    I had edged a week ago already, I think it ruined it all...
     
  13. A nu start

    A nu start Fapstronaut

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    Are you hitting the gym, eating well, getting some sunlight?
    Everyone says that nofap isn't the 'cure-all'. You need to use it as a springboard to start other good habits.
    Go lift some weights, have a nice meal and then sit in the sun for 10 minutes. Tell me you still feel like shit after that.
     
  14. Paper

    Paper Fapstronaut

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    I am hitting gym only when I have a time, computer sciences, pretty tough course, but yeah, Yesterday I went to the gym, but my mistake was, that I went on empty stomach, so no strenght, after that I went to dorms to eat and relax, later I went to the club, but still I felt sad, today I feel a bit better, but insecurities bother me.
     
  15. Walk_it_out

    Walk_it_out Fapstronaut

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    It will get better bro..maybe you have things to face that are making you sad? Let your emotions out if you are able. It's ok and needful to do..keep doing what you can and press forward even when it's hard. Its always worth it man..you are doing really well...it will pass just ride this storm out
     
  16. yaaz

    yaaz Fapstronaut

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    Hang on brother , life is not always a “cake” , not because u did 90 days that u will never experience those symptoms. Either u have some other mental issue not related to PMO which i dont think is the case , or u r having stressfull days in ur work or school . If u really did the 90 day challenge then i am sure that u can manage it with time . A person who does 90 is “strong” and does not let those feelings get into him

    Remeber that
     
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  17. MusicMan123

    MusicMan123 Fapstronaut

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    Been there done that. Edging is a disaster. Like playing with fire hoping not to get burned.
     
    Walk_it_out likes this.
  18. Paper

    Paper Fapstronaut

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    I am motivated to continue, but I don't understand this reason for my sadness, I can't create good jokes anymore, I don't feel like talking with anyone...
     
    Walk_it_out likes this.
  19. Paper

    Paper Fapstronaut

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    Thanks mate! :)
     
  20. Paper

    Paper Fapstronaut

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    You have edged in this period of 90 days, how it affected you, did you felt anything ?
     

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