Day 60

So I think I'm a little more than Day 60. Almost relapsed yesterday bc of boredom and alcohol. Throughout my reboot there's been a few times where I would slip up and start browsing instagram for something arousing or start touching down there. Never edged though, maybe a little once. I notice when I slip up like that I snap out of it but I feel tired/down for the rest of the day.

For this next month I think I'm going to do hardcore mode and see the benefits. One thing I do alot is fantasize about a love life and just cuddling and being w a SO. I think I'm just extremely lonely with alot of stress on me and that won't go away. So Im lost.

But as for benefits, idk. I'm definitely better at talking to girls but dont know I can't ask them out. I get nervous around pretty girls still but it's getting better. I've made muscle gains but that's from working out/eating right. I have confidence in the way that I look up in a room instead of looking down and shy.

Not to the point where I want to be yet, I really really want a relationship. I think that would be a huge stress relief. Somebody to be with and share. I'm making pRogers from 4 months ago and about a year before then PMOing myself to sleep every single night, not working out, and failing classes. I was so messy and lazy I would O into a paper towel and just throw it on the ground in my room. There were just probably 30 crumpled up paper towels randomly in my room. This was going on every night for about a year and a half. So I think I'm progressing. Just sad sometimes looking at my reality.

 

Thinking about stopping cigs/weed temporarily

 

Relationship is not a magical cure for depression. Sure you can fly for a while on the wings of love but get even lower and more depressed afterwards. Being alone is more like neutral and being in relationship can be haven or hell. If you choose to go up on emotional roller coaster then you are choosing to go down as well.

Depression should go away during month 3. Just keep busy and train cause moving a lot helps a lot with depression. Sport is healthy. After you are over depression in month 3 then you should start feeling really confident and great about yourself.

Also after 90 days you have to find new motivation cause not fapping wont cut it, you will be stuck without adding new good things to the mix. If you want to be better with talking to a girls then you can google my guide - Guide on interacting with girls

But gratz ! Hardest part is over.
Be careful with alcohol cause too much relapse will follow. Seen a 400+ day guy relapsed after drinking twice more than usual.

 

Thanks. I'm not sure I don't think I have depression. I'll be good with one night stands. It's not even about sex I just want somebody. And sex lmao. But thanks, I'll check that out

 

July? Alright i suppose ,you?