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Day 19

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by nwo4life, Feb 8, 2019.

  1. Feb 8, 2019 #1
    nwo4life

    nwo4life Fapstronaut

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    Hi, a brief update for you guys and after some advice....

    I’m on day 19....doing ok, almost totally forgotten about porn, although I have pics of my Mrs feet/shoes which I used to fap to (because there was no sex), and pics of her standing on me, does looking at these count as a sort of porn? Or is it ok because there her feet?

    Saying this...on day 15, SHE actually initiated sex for the first time in a long time, kissing touching etc, and even allowed me her feet and she enjoyed it! I couldn’t believe my luck. I did ejaculate, is this a fail as I haven’t since?

    Since then it’s gone flat again, with the NoFap I’m starting to feel more and more emotions towards her, also starting to be turned on by more then just her feet and can’t bare to be away from her etc and jus want to make love, but she doesn’t seem to feel the same way? Or am I just over thinking??

    Thankyou
     
    nwo4life, Feb 8, 2019
    nwo4life, Feb 8, 2019
    #1
  2. Feb 9, 2019 #2
    boilerball123

    boilerball123 Fapstronaut

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    My Journal
    Congrats on making it this far. Regarding the pictures, I would avoid and consider deleting. Even though they are you wife's feet, they are still pixels, an image, and not the real thing. When we start to substitute images for reality, we start to go down the porn path, which is costly and detrimental.

    As far as the sex/ejac goes, it being a fail or no fail really depends on your goals and what you are trying to achieve. If you are trying to avoid orgasm as a part of a larger reboot, then it is a fail. Talk to your wife about what you are doing and work together to reach your PMO free goals. If this isn't your aim, then you are doing ok.

    If you haven't been talking to your wife through this process, however, you are missing something and your sex is not going to reach the closeness and love-making aims for both of you.

    Keep fighting.
     
    boilerball123, Feb 9, 2019
    boilerball123, Feb 9, 2019
    #2
  3. Feb 9, 2019 #3
    nwo4life

    nwo4life Fapstronaut

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    Thankyou for your reply

    I think I will delete the pics, as you say they are not the deal thing and only a memory really.
    My wife is very unaffectionate even in terms of kiss an cuddle etc, so the feet have kept me going (fapping) as the sex wasn’t there so when she initiated sex I couldn’t resist. I’m not a massive porn fan so I don’t feel that is a problem,
    The goal of nofap for me was to try stop fapping over her feet, and to engage more with her physically an emotionally, which I think was working but seems to have flattened,
    Also the benefits more energy, less depressed, more confident, and I feel more attracted to her in other ways I haven’t before.
    I don’t think I can talk to her about this because she wouldn’t understand, I’m hoping the more days I get under my belt the better the attraction from her to me will be.
    It’s hard tho day 20....
     
    nwo4life, Feb 9, 2019
    nwo4life, Feb 9, 2019
    #3

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