Curvy or Skinny? Now Im confused

I'm not sure I can provide you the definitive type of answer that you might like or even that such an answer can be given. However, after laying off from PMO for a while, I personally found my "type" to become much less relevant when I notice people I find attractive. I'll admit it is kind of confusing and frustrating to realize how many options there are, but I try not to worry about it too much and spin it as a positive.

Whether you are looking for more casual hookups or a serious relationship, I don't see how being attracted to a variety of women can hurt you. If you're just looking to hookup, you have that many more options and can take time to appreciate different body types. If you are looking for a serious relationship, it just means that you don't have to be quite as selective when it comes to looks and you can think more about compatibility. Either way, I wouldn't stress about the cause of what you're experiencing.

 

I realize the context of a monogamous relationship complicates things, but I would be reluctant to call an attraction to a particular type of person a fetish assuming the attraction isn't to something out of the ordinary about a person (e.g. plastic surgery, amputees, morbid obesity, etc.). I also think it's narrow-minded to think that a person has one innate "type" and anything outside of that becomes a fetish. Certainly, PMO can be the causes of changing preferences (which I don't necessarily think is a good thing), but I don't think a changing preference is inherently bad. For example, I had a meaningful relationship romantic relationship with a latino man, and since then, I've been more interested in latino men.

In your specific case, if the ogling is bothering both you and your SO, I totally understand using therapy to mitigate that attraction and improve your relationship. That said, I think therapy would be totally unnecessary in the face of a sexual preference – or even a fetish – that isn't harmful to anyone. I don't think the factor that should differentiate whether the attraction is a problem is whether the fetish is "true" (which I think by your terms really refers to longstanding or something new), but instead by whether the fetish is a problem for the individual or those close to them. There would be nothing wrong with Mixtec engaging in a real relationship with a petite asian woman, so I don't see how the result of that therapy would be worth the time, money, and effort.

 

If you're into asian girls then just go for them bruh

Im like you but with white girls its all just personal preference

 

I admire you for keeping your boyfriend so whipped

Idk how you got him to go to THERAPY because he looks at other girls lol

Its not a fetish to be into a certain type of girl and even if it is who gives a fuck

Why would you want someone to go to therapy for finding girls attractive

 

This isn't something I did.
It's something he wanted to do.

I simply wanted to help the OP.
And there are differences between fetishes and kinks and for people who have such problems with PMO I find it constantly fascinating that men know so little about it.
I was answering the OP who had a question about what he prefers....
And knowing about fetishes and your own personal evolution, what is true to you and, for instance if you had a trauma that brought it about, for instance (might require therapy)
Also, if you are in a situation where it can be uncomfortable... Like work or with family.
I personally prefer dark skinned women... Yet I'm with a man currently.
Just because I have a preference, don't mean I have a fetish for this.

And also, if you end up chasing a fetish IRL, it's just going to evolve, eventually the same way it would on screen.... If it's not a true fetish.
Again, play all you want in the ignorance is bliss card, it's your life.
I was just trying to be helpful.
My SO is a year plus PM free.

But what Do I know?

 

I think you are overthinking this just a bit. Many people are attracted to all types of looks. If you are not in a relationship explore both, play the field. Ultimately when you choose to settle down you should focus on things other than looks or type but compatibility. That Asian girl may treat you poorly or just not be compatible. Same with the Hispanic girl.

 

First, I want to apologize if I can off as condescending or it seemed like I was trying to invalidate your opinion. Congrats to you and your SO for your achievements this last year. I know I can get a little militant when I feel someone in a position of vulnerability is being given advice from someone who is acting as an expert. I can see you have your own situation figured out, and I'm legitimately happy for you, but it's a little imposing to say the knowledge of your situation gives you knowledge of what constitutes a fetish and how all men operate. I just wanted to provide the caveat that your own experiences might not be the right answer for the OP. Your experiences are valid, and I'm glad you are willing to self-disclose to help others.

Based on this post, I don't think we have that different of opinions. Our usages of the terms "kink" and "fetish" probably differ and that might be the misunderstanding. Denotatively, there is little difference between the two, so our connotations are bound to play a big role there. That aside, I don't think the OP expressed specifically that his attractions were uncomfortable aside from them being confusing and the concern of whether or not they were lasting. Hence, I don't see how therapy would be helpful.

 

Like whatever, just make sure they're truly female.

 

See post here https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.p...choolgirl-porn-fetish-trigger-warning.116647/