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Crush said what I feel for her isnt love.

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Potato93, Jul 10, 2018.

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  1. Potato93

    Potato93 Fapstronaut

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    For me love is about caring for the other person and feeling special when she's around.
    Love is about acknowledging your errors and forgiveness.
    Love is travelling miles just to see her smile because it makes you more present in life.
    Love is about letting the other person go because you try to put yourself into her shoes.

    That doesnt mean I dont respect myself too, neither depend on other peoples happiness.
    Its the worst thing in the world when somebody you care say the contrary.
    I feel like anything I say (good or bad) is going to be contested anyway.
     
  2. r8js

    r8js Fapstronaut

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    Same story here i was with a girl. I was happy atleast she was around me. I wanted nothing more than that. I was committed she would not have any bad experience b/c of my addicted mindset. So,i just started taking simple small steps. But she just friendzoned me.
     
  3. Ra's Al Ghul

    Ra's Al Ghul Fapstronaut

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    Unrequited love is the worst. Tough break. Try to move on, and take it day by day.
     
  4. NoBrainer

    NoBrainer Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    She doesn't understand love I guess. Her loss.
     
  5. What can you say man? She's not into you. Been there.....it's definitely a knife-to-the-gut sort of feeling.

    What has me curious though.....is that you consider your feelings for her to be "love."

    Cause the same girls I've asked out in the past, and been rejected by, and made me feel as though all is lost? I later came to realize that it wasn't because I was in love with these girls, but because I was more-or-less desperate. Not that these weren't great girls to be with, but to say I was in love with them was a bit of a stretch.

    Not to imply that you're desperate, or that you're lying. It's just that what you have written sounds like something I would've said in the past.
     
  6. r8js

    r8js Fapstronaut

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    I may not be perfect for love , i may not get love ,but i also donot want to be bad person for females. I donot want to have that dirty impure feelings for them.
     
  7. reborn999

    reborn999 Fapstronaut

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    go mgtow man :),
     
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  8. Potato93

    Potato93 Fapstronaut

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    What is the problem of being desperate? Please, elaborate.
    You can be desperate AND in love. It's not a binary thing.
     
    Last edited: Jul 11, 2018
  9. Potato93

    Potato93 Fapstronaut

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    No, Im not. That would be just stupid generalization.
     
    Deleted Account and NoBrainer like this.

  10. Nah, they're definitely not binary things. As humans, engaging with other humans, in this thing we call life....I'd say we seldom deal in binary.

    When you are desperate though, it might cause you to interpret a situation differently than you might if you weren't desperate.

    For all I know, this girl could have been your true love, and what took place is an unfortunate circumstance of unrequited love.

    For all I know, desperation led you to believe that this was love, but in reality, you were just trying to fill the void.

    For all I know, it's both....I'm just suggesting you think through this a little more.


    Ask yourself....what is love and were you in love with this girl.



    As far as what's wrong with desperation, nothing is inherently wrong with it. It's an emotional state that comes about when life deals you a shit hand. It happens.
    The problem is that desperation could have you misjudging things, thus causing you to act in an otherwise productive manner.


    For example, hitting on a girl that isn't interested in you, because she was nice and talked to you and you thought something was there, but there really wasn't. Not saying that's what you did, just throwing that out there, cause, unfortunately, I've been there, so that example makes sense to me :(


    In that case, she wasn't into you early on, but she could've developed a love interest over time, but now you told her.........and depending on the extent to which you let your feelings be known (ie., asking her out vs. writing a 5 page poem describing your love to her and dropping it off in her mailbox, even though she never gave you an address), you could've destroyed any chance with this girl, or maybe even thrown away a perfectly good friendship, because this girl will never be into you, and you either kept trying to make something happen or you end it prematurely because you can't stand to simply be friends with someone you're in love with.


    So..........yeah, desperation has problems that come with it lol.
     
  11. reborn999

    reborn999 Fapstronaut

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    I think just focus on yourself man, that's what I'm saying,, girls come and go man,
     
  12. reborn999

    reborn999 Fapstronaut

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    bro ive been in love and when it doens't go like the movie, then maybe y ou gotta realize, movies aren't real life, somebody go's we be hurt and there is no happy ending, for some there is, but that's mostly in movies man
     
  13. EXPONENTIALLY

    EXPONENTIALLY Fapstronaut

    if she's a brain-dead jezebel used up zombie leech, you can't go far with her anyway
     
  14. tweeby

    tweeby Banned

    What you've described is infatuation. . . Sorry man.
     
  15. tweeby

    tweeby Banned

    Because you don't offer anything.

    Consider this, every (straight) woman desires a guy who is free.
    You should be free as a bird, flapping around, singing, full of joy with life. Women want to FUCK the bird and throw it in a cage (cage = committment).

    When birds try to fly into the cage, wouldn't you think something is wrong with that bird? After all, who wants a bird that WANTS to be in the cage? No, women want the birds that are FREE, WILD, and BEAUTIFUL. They want A GOOD CATCH. Good Catches do not fly into cages. Only wounded or needy birds do.

    Women aren't complicated, our feelings just get in the way of what we WANT to do rather then what we SHOULD do. We want to rub their feet and build statues of them. We should demand respect and reward them only for good behavior.

    No you can NOT, love is mutual, if you are in love and she is not, then that's infatuation.
     
    Last edited: Jul 12, 2018
  16. EXPONENTIALLY

    EXPONENTIALLY Fapstronaut

    But as long as the
    doesn't stop, then it's love. Romanticized lust isn't love.
     
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  17. Just love. Love is an amazing thing like...

    Honestly, I wish I knew what love was earlier in life; it would have staved off so much fucking hurt my dude.

    But alas, we all make shitty mistakes....
    Anyway, it sounds like you love this person. So love them. Love them and make no fucking apologies for it! No matter where you are, no matter where you go, no matter who you end up having sex with in the end; love them! It sounds like they are worth it.

    Love is infinite, and incredible. Go forever. Love you my dude

    xoxo
     
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  18. Potato93

    Potato93 Fapstronaut

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    A good catch or not its going to end inside the jail anyway, so why not accepting what you have instead of always seeking for more? :(
    Man, Im sorry, but you're so wrong... NO ONE can contest your own love.
    I wish and I offer my love. No its not infatuation.

    [​IMG]

    short lived passion is far from what Ive experienced.
    For someone that has a signature saying "dont mistake kindness for weakness." You truly contradict yourself.
     
    Last edited: Jul 11, 2018
  19. My dude... love is okay. Always.

    If she (THEY) doesn't love you? Love is okay.
    If she (THEY) loves you passionately? Love is okay.
    If she (THEY) loves you... hardly? Love is okay.
    If she (THEY) loves you barely? Love is okay.

    Love is always okay. Even if they don't love you in return... love is always okay. Love is great. Love love...
    But if they don't love you back? Just.. just move on. I know it's hard. But you get there. You always get there.

    Love, Always
    No one is exempt from the odds of even.

    xoxo
     
    Potato93 likes this.
  20. Potato93

    Potato93 Fapstronaut

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    Im trying to understand you at my best, but if she explicit says that she will never be into you why wouldnt that be misjudgement as well? Since she never took the chance to actually see through that desperation.

    Why asking her out destroys any chance, wouldnt it be worst to regret of never having the courage of doing so? Even if you find the odds against you...

    having her contesting your feelings is already enough, don't let it change you.
     
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