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Comparing yourself with others

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by yungming88, Jan 16, 2015.

  1. yungming88

    yungming88 Fapstronaut

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    Hi everyone,

    I wanted to write to you about my own issues and demons that I face. I am, like many of us on this forum, a porn addict. I have been PMO since I was 13 and I realised that my little porn hobby spiralled out of control after I met with my first girl when I was 24. We both met overseas, did the long distance thing and I think during that time I used porn heavily to make up for the loss of sexual intimacy in my life. When we eventually broke up in 2012, I went further deeper into the hole and started fapping almost everyday. It was at the beginning of 2014 that I started this program and there were two good period in that year when I was doing well for myself. The first half of the year where I went for 80-odd days and the second half of the year where I went 110+ days! The months in the mid year and the last month or so, I reverted back to old self unfortunately. I was recently down about this and I continued to read a few more post here and I found one that really resonated with me.

    Success is not linear. It's more of a wave
    (http://www.nofap.com/forum/showthread.php?28010-Just-completed-90-days-here-s-my-Top-10-Tip-List)

    This was such a profound statement to me. That's exactly what I thought to myself. I messed up for a few months in 2013 but I can pick myself up and try again.

    We all are addicted to porn because we filling a void that will never be fulfilled by porn. For me, it's my insecurities and my constant need to compare with others. I am an insecure person deep down - I have been working on this part of myself for years..since I was 15 actually. And though I feel like I have made a major progress in those year, that little insecure guys comes out once and a while. I compare myself with others a lot - a part of me which I truly don't like. I will be honest with you, 2011 was the last time I properly had sex. Now the years between then and now scare me and right now I am comparing myself to some imaginary person who I don't even know. I know I shouldn't be down about this petty little thing but someone my ego or my head or something in me still responds to this..

    I was wondering what do you do to improve yourself, lower your insecurities and stop comparing yourself to others? I mean, is it possible for us to stop comparing oneself to others? Is that not human nature after all?
     

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